Who WBU? Mortifying train incident.

[MikeReepySpooksard]

Ds, 15 months, has an unfortunate hair pulling habit. Today on the train he got hold of the hair of the teenage girl sitting in the seat behind his and yanked it. She screamed 'get the fuck off me' and glared at him. She kept turning round and glaring at him the rest of the journey.

OP. did you not wonder why she kept giving you evils?
i'll ask again.

If my daughter reacted like that to a very young child I'd be horrified. If it was her initial reaction on having her hair pulled I'd still expect her to immediately apologise upon turning round and seeing who it was. I don't think its ever OK to scream/swear at a child.
I am very surprised your DH didn't say anything though.

you are the unreasonable one. control your child.

also, you don't know what issues the teenager has.

Why can't people read the OP's posts?

For all she knew if could have been the DH since he ignored her when she turned round notanyanymore.

Youthecat Thank. Fuck. Someone understands! :D

I didn't see her glaring, dh told me after we got off the train. I was too busy supervising my 2 kids and dh I didn't see or hear or know anything about it until she and we all had gone.

Mike, I'm sooooooo stealing that!

They got someone for it Maryz, seems he'd killed his GF in Italy and stuffed her in a tiny room in a church, then killed a Mother a mile or so away from here.
Her DC found her when they got home from school, her had mutilated her body and put body parts in a plastic bag beside her.
One of her DC had the same name as one of mine and it kind of stuck, the whole horror of it.

I agree with you mrs miniver.

Of course you have to defend yourself but on seeing it was a toddler even if you didn't feel you ought to apologise you could just say I thought that was an adult. It hurt!

So for the rest of the 1.5 hour journey you didn't see her glaring at your DS?

I had this happen to me once- back to back seats, irritating child on the seat behind me allowed to stand in it started messing with my hair after a few minutes of general fidgeting, which was bad enough.

I told said child to 'stop doing that' firmly and it's terminally wet parents at least had the grace to look sheepish.

They didn't stop the child from standing on the seat, though, which was really annoying as I could feel it fidgeting and wriggling over the top of the seat- very distracting and I didn't know whether it was going to start messing with my hair again or not. If you did that I wouldn't have blamed the girl for turning round and glaring at all.

I actually think if you feel attacked on a train it would be better to leg it and ring the button for a guard than get aggressive - it could make a situation worse.

The teenager wasn't being unreasonable - I take heart that she shouted - good for her that she had the strength to shout out and make a fuss rather than be a good girl and be quiet and nice and non threatening
Lucky for her it was a small child- I know of several teenagers who have been assaulted on public transport.
You are minimising what has happened here and your DH needs a bloody quick lesson on parenting.
Calling others on here cunts isn't helpful.

OP nobody who's read the thread seems to think you're personally at fault at this point apart from in your choice of DH. And the teenager was clearly not BU in reacting to having her hair pulled by someone unknown who didn't apologize. Maybe this would be a good time to step away and have some ?

Yes maybe, but then maybe if she had thought it was DH she would have continued the verbal confrontation? Or maybe, from the positioning of DH and DS it was obvious to her who it was? Or maybe she's just obnoxious? Or maybe DH is a secret hair puller and nearly had his cover blown? Who knows?!

Sorry just seen it was your DH in charge - then you are both BU Are you sure? Someone did something which I had no knowledge of and no control over, but I'm jointly responsible? Because I married the person in question, is that right? Another fine contribution. Is it a full moon tonight?

So your dh told you she had kept glaring?

From your language, I suspect it won't be the first time your child has hear the f word anyway.

Can we get CCTV footage? It's the only way!

*cuntribution. Obviously! Damn autocorrect :o

So everyone on MN swears at babies then?

I've said cunt on here but I categorically do not shout cunt at my toddler.

If hair pulling is a habit of his, you were bloody silly not to consider the possibility of him doing it to random strangers.
If he was standing up on the seat behind her head, close enough to grab her hair he was probably being bloody annoying even before the hair grabbing, tbh.
I hate people invading my space when I'm trapped in a seat on a train or bus.

Someone did something which I had no knowledge of and no control over, but I'm jointly responsible?

So since you weren't there and weren't responsible and don't think you've done anything wrong, why did you start this thread? It reads awfully like you started out wanting to be told the teenager was BU, which is odd, since you didn't know anything about what had happened.

Harold, hair pulling can be a very sexual thing and is happens in a lot of assaults. Shouting may not help if someone is out to beat you up for the sake of it, but may be useful in the case of a surreptitious sexual assault.
There is a brilliant (but vv sad) blog by a young girl who was sexually assaulted a number of times on the tube. She was too scared to say anything while it was happening, but these assaults range from groping to her actually being penetrated digitally. Attackers like this rely on their victims being shocked into silence.