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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think its not ok to call people mental

145 replies

LEMisafucker · 27/10/2013 21:59

It would appear that mental health is one of those areas where it is still OK to be prejudiced. To the extent where people do it without any real malice and would probably realise they are causing upset.

But the thing is, it DOES upset me and i am pretty sure it upsets others.

It upsets me because i a have fairly minor mental health issues, they often quite a negative impact on my life but its ok, im on medication, it helps. Other people aren't quite so lucky and their illnesses have a huge impact.

Over and over i see this on threads - Well, shes mental or she needs her meds The connotation being that a person is derranged or barking mad.

In tesco they have a halloween costume called "mental patient" Hmm

I suppose i am technically a mental patient - but im not likely to go running down the street murdering people and social services have not seen fit to remove my children.

I don't want to upset anyone but mental illness has enough taboo, people don't seek help because they are ashamed as it is still so misunderstood - something that isn't spoken about, but still joked about.

I know this may seem trivial to some people but I have had people treat me differently because i have had some mh problems - nothing major really, PND and anxiety, but you can see people sort of taking a step back say if you tell them you are on ADs. I have learnt its better not to tell anyone, but if i were a diabetic i wouldn't feel the need to keep that a secret.

I just wanted to challenge the taboo a bit (apologies if it was comments on another thread that made me want to post this but didn't want to "kick off" on the thread anymore than i did and hijack, it just really gets me down)

OP posts:
MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:38

You keep saying that "mental" now means "crazy" or "mad", and so no longer derogatory, but both of those terms are also derogatory terms for the mentally ill.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 27/10/2013 23:39

YY, murder.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:39

'Your interpretation is simply less tenable than mine. Sorry, but it is'

I'm not twisting it - that's your quote. My interpretation, as I've explained, is the way the word makes me feel. Which is not offended. You've said that opinion is less tenable than yours.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:40

I don't think odd, bizarre, crazy or wild are disablist terms either?! Do you?

LRDtheFeministDragon · 27/10/2013 23:41

Yes - and does 'feelings' occur in that quotation? Why no, it does not. You made that up.

The reason I say your interpretation is less tenable than mine is exactly what others have said - you claim 'mental' isn't offensive because you use it to be rude about behaviour that seems to you 'mad' or 'crazy'. But that is rude in itself! So you have no argument.

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:41

Crazy is. What do you think crazy is in reference to?

LRDtheFeministDragon · 27/10/2013 23:42

Uh, yeah, obviously crazy is disablist.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:42

What about looney/lunatic? I hear that all the time here.

SPsTombRaidingWithCliff · 27/10/2013 23:43

I've called my mum mental a few times and she has called me it as well as described situations as mental.

She has and had MH problems. Some more severe than others but the word mental when used between us has nothing to do with her MH at all.

She knows that and as do I. Its just a descriptive word as is mad, crazy etc in the way we use it.

But there are some words we avoid using in the house and hate kids using even if they are repeating a new story etc so I guess words have different affects/effects (?) on people.

Words I hate hearing even though they aren't offensive but they are really like trigger words.

I get where the word comes from and how people can be offended by it though. Imo it depends on context.

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:43

Um yeah.. loony is too..

You really have to ask?

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:44

I said much earlier in the thread that crazy was just as offensive.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:45

Hmm I wasn't asking.

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:46

"What about looney/lunatic?"

You did ask Confused

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:48

Crazy doesn't have anything to do with mental illness. It is a word that means someone is acting wild, or particularly enthusiastic.

It was attributed to offensively describe mental health patients at some point in the past. Fine.

I think it's fair to say, modern times have moved past this. We all know that you don't call someone with MH issues crazy. Or mental.

Those words have new meanings now

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:49

Dictionary definitions

  1. mentally deranged; demented; insane.
AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:49

Sorry banshees - it wasn't meant to be a question, I was making the point that some words are used here that really are very derogatory. Focusing on a word that has moved far beyond that is pointless and trite.

I think I might have been better off giving a fuller description with that post - it does look like a question! Grin

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:50

"I think it's fair to say, modern times have moved past this. We all know that you don't call someone with MH issues crazy. Or mental. "

That'd be nice if it were true.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:51

Erm, banshees you did read the other two definitions too, right?

Words often have more than one meaning.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 27/10/2013 23:52

Yes, 'crazy' does have to do with mental illness. It comes from the word 'crazed', meaning mentally ill.

You have admitted you may be ignorant of words' meaning. Don't you think it is a bit off to then pretend you know which words have 'moved beyond' your 'definitions'?

As a side note, citing a dictionary does not make you an authority, you know.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:53

I'm gonna say that it is true where I am, or at least in the circles I move in.

People will say such like 'I had mental night last night', and there is never any implication that this is in anything other than a reference to having a wild time.

From this thread, I've seen that clearly some people are still in cultures where people use the term mental or crazy as a terribly offensive term, and that is probably why the opinions are differing.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:54

I didn't cite a dictionary, banshees posted a link to a dictionary website.

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:54

Just for the fun of it, and to avoid going through it all one by one.

All from the same dictionary website.

Crazy = 1. mentally deranged; demented; insane.
Lunatic = 1. an insane person.
Loony = 1. lunatic; insane.
Mental = 6. Informal. slightly daft; out of one's mind; crazy: He's mental.
Mad = 1. mentally disturbed; deranged; insane; demented.

Notice how for most of them the very first description is to do with mental health.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 27/10/2013 23:55

Yes, my teacher moved in circles where it was quite acceptable to call children 'special' when they'd got something wrong, and to make a little boy diagnosed with special needs feel awful.

Some 'circles' are like that.

We agree perfectly on this point.

MurderOfBanshees · 27/10/2013 23:55

Just because words have picked up other definitions over time doesn't take away the original meanings, and the associated offensiveness.

AlexaChelsea · 27/10/2013 23:56

But lrd, I wouldn't call someone who was acting in a manner that could be attributed to mental illness, mental. I would consider that offensive.

So yes, we do agree on that.

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