To not allow swimsuit stealing MIL to just 'drop in'

[fairy1303]

Posted many times about MIL.

DSD lives with us full time and MIl very VERy OTT with her/us - she used to be at our house nearly everyday, would take washing home, without permission, took her swimsuit home, is just generally a nightmare.

She recently kicked me out of her car in the rain, told me I was a rude bitch and tried to drive off with DS.

Now, in the interests of civility we have been rubbing along ok, but we have barely seen each other.

DSD had a plastic dressing table thing. We bought her a new grown up one and are passing on the small one to her cousin.

It comes with various accessories, hair brush, pretend perfume bottle etc.
MIL has taken the dressing table to her house as she is seeing the cousin next week before we do.

She has left the lid (small, plastic) of one of the 'perfume bottles' here. She has described where it is. I am seeing her tonight.

She wants to 'pop over' on Tuesday to find it herself. I have suggested I just give it to her tonight when we see her. She is not happy with this, wants to come on Tuesday. I have explained that I have a friend over on tues, may be in and out, is not convenient. She wants me to leave a key out for her and feels I am being completely unreasonable.

Am I? I can't see it anymore as I am too embroiled!

Well done if you have waded through the tedium and got this far!

Are you sure the lid even exists?

Just let your husband pop it over tonight or stick it through the letterbox!

god - I've got a MIL like her too - sympathise! You are def not BU, take the lid as others have said hand it over in front of someone else. DO NOT leave a key anywhere for her unless you are planning on getting the locks changed!!! Similar issues here too.....stay strong !!!

I wonder if she still turns up on Tuesday anyway?

You know, just to check you're not shagging around

She doesn't give up, does she?

Mine would definitely still show up on Tuesday too - I would be waiting for her...... on edge

I read your previous threads, and am amazed at your MIL's continued behaviour. Her latest text is upping the ante, I feel. She is implicitly threatening you, now that she knows that you won't accept her as Alpha Female in your family.
She is now going the 'divide & conquer' route to reel your DH back in.
Be sure to forward her latest text to him, and let her know that you have done so. And be prepared for further slurs. My MIL has conferred (self diagnosed) personality disorders on free-flying DILs

I'm new to your mil, so can I just ask if DH knows what a nutter she is?

I think you're fantastically patient OP.

Do what is best for you and don't let her wind you up!!

Forward the text suggesting you are having an affair to your DH and tell him you en't tolerate this shit.

He can take the precious perfume lid tonight and he can explain to her that her behaviour continues to be unacceptable.

If she comes on Tuesday then you can question her sanity to her face.

Sweet Jesus!
I remember your thread about the swimming cossie - She's still not getting it nor listening to you is she - she's absolutely fucking mental.
What does she want to come around snooping in your house for now, you've already made it perfectly clear that it's not acceptable. You honestly must have the patience of a saint.

In this situation - YADNBU take the missing piece to her and be done with it.
YY to telling her your friend is a member of 'the lesbians'
Let her think what she wants about it.

Meant to add - I'd make sure I was out on Tuesday when she's likely to pop round - she's so ignorant and irrational she probably will anyway, I'd make sure I closed my bedroom curtains and the living room - give her something to think about.
If you can't reason with her suspicion = feed it

Obviously you'd have to fess up to DH so there was no confusion.

Is there a way to find the other threads? I'm still a newbie on here, and I feel like I need to read this back story.

FWIW Fairy, even from what I have read just here YANBU - she sounds mad as a box of frogs.

I've read your other threads and I can't get over how patient you are!

Take the lid tonight, its completely ridiculous! If she still insists on calling in Tuesday because she's "in the area" insist that's its not
Convenient because you have a friend round. I think you have handled things really well but She will never get the message so you need to get a bit tougher with her.

If she knew exactly where it was, why didn't she take it with her originally.

Definitely a ploy to come round

Say no to her but dont take the top over. Go out on Tuesday with your friends and make sure she knows your plans.

Wait round the corner and if when she lets herself in you yours call the police and say you think you're being burgled.

So she's be in the area on Tuesday but you'll be at her house tonight. Nope, it's still doesn't make sense for you not to take it tonight. Nobody's going out their way.

She definitely seems to be getting between you and your DP. Does she not realise she's going about it in completely the wrong way, as all she's doing is making herself look like an evil old bat and strengthening you and your DP's partnership? You stay strong and remember, YADNBU!

NO! DONT TAKE THE LID!! When you see her later, tell her you'll leave the key under the mat for her on tuesday.....but actually leave the lid instead! Maybe with a nice sarcastic note to go with it to let her know you're onto her.

wow vtechjazz, you're good

I like vetch's idea! I would be furious about that last text though. She's threatening to try to break up your marriage. What has your DH said?

vetch? vtech I mean!

Let her come round on Tuesday and find you obv up to no good. Scantily clad. Etc. with DH. That'll learn her.

Kumamon Go to search at the top of the page and type in OP's name it'll bring up her previous threads if she hasn't name changed.

Thanks very much!

My own MIL is disgustingly lovely and reasonable, so I must live vicariously through mumsnet!