to be concerned about my friend giving birth in the USA?

[YoniGetAnOohWithTyphoo]

My friend 'P' got pregnant by an american citizen (unplanned, on holiday kind of thing...) anyway, cut a long story short: he has said that whilst he isn't interested in her (and much less in coming over to the UK to play happy families), he, and moreover his mother, seem very keen for P to come over and give birth in the US, all expenses paid.

Whilst this seems like a nice gesture on the face of it, i'm a bit worried. Notwithstanding the fact that P seems to honestly think she's gonna fly to the USA alone at about 35 weeks pregnant (don't they have rules about this sort of thing?) with all the suitcases in tow, if a baby is born in the USA i'm worried it will be an 'american citizen' and as such, won't just be allowed to fly back to the UK. Do any mumsnetters know about this?

I'm haven't said much yet because I don't want to hurt her feelings or scare her, I know at the end of the day it's her choice... but I can't help thinking she hasn't thought this through. What do you guys think?

I've been wondering for a while how this would turn out. Not looking good for your friend at all is it?

Here hoping for a happy ending!

I was just thinking last night about this and wondering if there was an update.

I think we need to send a big wave of MN vibes and hope for the best outcome!

Wow what a scary situation. I really hope P and baby are ok :(

I wondered if their was an update & if your friend has had the baby yet? Hope the outcome is better than predicted.

.

Any news OP??

Hi all. Just checking in with an update.

First the good news: P gave birth today, a 9lb baby boy. Mum and baby doing well.

On the downside, apparently since she got to the US it seems everything we predicted is unfurling. MIL turned up at the house 2 days after P's arrival and has been there ever since, doing nothing but criticising and sniping at P. Babydaddy presented P with divorce papers on the day of her arrival, basically saying 'look, everything's good to go, we can start as soon as the baby is born'. Despite this, he has basically made sure she has to share a bed with him even though she didn't want to, because the mattress from one of the spare bedrooms has mysteriously 'gone missing' and the other spare room being used up by MIL.

P is now finally admitting she wishes she had listened more instead of hoping everything would turn out to be a fairytale. She says she want her mum, and she just wants to go home with her son and 'do things her way'.

I just really, really hope she gets her wish somehow.

Will keep you posted.

Oh shit.

I read this thread at the time but didn't contribute as i know nothing about US immigration. But from what I have read on the thread it isn't good.

I really really hope this works out well for her. i wish I could give some advice but I can't.

Congratulations to her on the birth of her son and I am hoping for the best.

Yes, keep us posted.

Poor, naïve, girl.

Very sad. She certainly aint returning with her baby though

Fucking hell, divorce papers: how charming!

Poor woman. What scheming bastards. Hope she can find a way out with her baby

Make sure that she knows not to sign anything until he has signed the papers and anything else needed for her to leave the country with the baby and a guarantee that all costs will be covered as promised.

It's so sad that despite the fact that everybody else could clearly see what was happening, she was so desperate for the 'happy ever after' that she dreamed of, that she was able to ignore the many risks and go for her dream

Can she report him for the wedding to get her health insurance? Is it not fraud? Sorry I'm clueless.

Good news about the baby. She will, of course, be coming home alone, divorced and with no hope of ever seeing her son again. Mil has moved in to take over the role of mother - just as we all predicted.

Your poor friend. I really hope she manages to get the help she needs but I feel it will be difficult.

My God, the poor girl. Is she trying to mAke plans to get out of there? Is there anyone here who can help her?

Your poor friend, this sounds horrendous. She needs legal advice and support now!

Is she still in contact with family back home? I hope that she has not shut them out because she is embarrassed about the situation she is now facing having been warned about it before leaving. Her family need to take advice on her behalf here to see what action needs to take place. I agree the expat forum will be a good source of support and advice.

In the meantime remind her to sign and agree to nothing. It may also be helpful to keep a diary of events since arriving in the US.

Best of luck x

Oh no.

your friend needs some really good legal advice.

Hope this all turns out okay for her.

Oh gosh, I really hoped you were gong to say she listened to you

I think I mentioned this before somewhere down thread but since they are married, she could qualify for free legal advice from the military base. I seem to recall he's in the reserves and lives in Northern Virginia (I'm also in N. VA with a military spouse).

Presuming she's got access to the internet, she can google whatever base it is and legal office and something should pop up.

I'm sorry it's turned out this way for her.

Crikey. I've only just seen this.

I'm so glad that other posters have been able to and still can give you such good advice.

I'm hoping more than anything that your friend can return to the UK with her ds very soon.