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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Would you wash mouth out with soap of 12 year old Son

322 replies

SilverStreak7 · 16/09/2013 17:38

He KEEPS using the C word .. Out of all swear words I hate that the most .. Would you wash his mouth out with soap ? I am aware he may swear outside (which Im not pleased with) but in front of me disgusts me . .

OP posts:
burberryqueen · 16/09/2013 18:36

no i would not for cunting fucks sake it is only a word

LynetteScavo · 16/09/2013 18:36

allforoneandoneforall - I'm very Sad reading what happened to you for putting on your mums make up.

That is not how most parents would have reacted.

usualsuspect · 16/09/2013 18:37

Do you keep records of us all?

Is my file very thick?

AnneUulmelmahay · 16/09/2013 18:37

Allfor that is AWFUL. Poor child-you. Cruel and unncessary. And yes, you sustained non accidental injuries, big red flags would be raised today.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 16/09/2013 18:38

I remember being screamed at that i "look like a fucking whore"

Jesus Christ, Allfor, that, along with your punishment, is a massively big deal IMO. Poor you.

MadBusLady · 16/09/2013 18:38

allforone It is quite shocking, honestly - both what was said to you and what was done. Just because they still don't think they did anything wrong, doesn't mean they're right.

RiotsNotDiets · 16/09/2013 18:39

all you did was put a bit of make up on All Confused

In what mentalists world does that deserve any kind of punishment?? You didn't hurt anyone and make up is easily washed off.

usualsuspect · 16/09/2013 18:40

They scrubbed your face so hard they gave you a black eye?

Sad for you.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 16/09/2013 18:41

Allfor I'm very aware that you were just sharing your experience, but I hope that you can see from the reactions to it that what your DPs did was totally inexcusable. All you did was put some make-up on. That's nothing. Sad

lborolass · 16/09/2013 18:46

I refuse to believe that being at the end of your tether would make even consider anything so bizarrely ridiculous as washing a child's mouth out with soap.

I had never come across anyone who thought this was anything other than a saying until I joined MN. I've been pushed to my limit many times but can't imagine being in a state of mind where I thought this was in any way something that would actually happen.

OP - do you have anyone who can help you with parenting your son?

BuskersCat · 16/09/2013 18:47

well that escalated quickly

littlemisswise · 16/09/2013 18:49

OMG allforone my mother was a fucking baggage but she would never have done anything like that! Jesus wept, scrubbed till you bled and had a black eye, and it is laughed about now! Fuck me they should be ashamed.

As for the OP you would be wrong. I would never have thought to have done it, besides my kids were bigger than me at 12.

StuntGirl · 16/09/2013 18:50

allfor I feel very sorry for you, as the abuse you suffered as a child has clearly warped your sense of what is normal and right. Screaming "You fucking whore" at a child, forcibly holding them down and scrubbing their face til they bleed, as well as giving them a black eye, is abuse. Sadly it appears you have normalised such behaviour, which is one of the horrible, sad consequences for victims of abuse.

MrsOakenshield · 16/09/2013 18:51

good heavens, allfor - so, at age 8 you put on some make up for a party (probably like you'd seen your mum do, no?), got screamed at, called a fucking whore, had your face scrubbed till it was raw, and sustained a black eye. And you and your mum think that was funny?

I sincerely hope you don't parent your own DC in such a manner.

DaleyBump · 16/09/2013 18:55

Wine for Olivia :)

ANormalOne · 16/09/2013 18:58

I cunt see the problem with using cunt, I really cunt.

Fenton · 16/09/2013 19:06

Is that supposed to be funny MNHQ?

did you delete my post because it said 'you can't get deleted for that surely?'

and you thought 'you can, and we will' ?

because I can't see what else I said that was delete-able.

I would really like you to explain it to me because I don't get it.

TIA

allforoneandoneforall · 16/09/2013 19:07

I guess that was just such a small incident in comparison to everything else that i have never really realised how it would look to someone else. It never, to be fair, done me any real harm. I only remembered it at the mention of soap and remember the taste of it.

RiotsNotDiets · 16/09/2013 19:09

Skin scrubbed to the point of bleeding and black eye constitute as real harm IMO

RiotsNotDiets · 16/09/2013 19:10

a black eye*

OliviaMMumsnet · 16/09/2013 19:11

@Fenton

Is that supposed to be funny MNHQ?

did you delete my post because it said 'you can't get deleted for that surely?'

and you thought 'you can, and we will' ?

because I can't see what else I said that was delete-able.

I would really like you to explain it to me because I don't get it.

TIA

Yes. That was what I meant.
Sorry I meant to put a quote and a smiley face and I forgot. #fail

Bumps are fine thanks but am V tired and a bit grumpy today

allforoneandoneforall · 16/09/2013 19:12

I guess times,opinions and discipline methods have changed, it was the norm then i think, although i'm only 30

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 16/09/2013 19:13

allfor I have to say, unless you were 8 back in the Victorian era then it was abusive.

On a lighter note, my 21mo eats soap. What am I supposed to wash his mouth out with? He hates cake, could I use cake?

YouTheCat · 16/09/2013 19:14

Allfor, I'm 44. Got a smacked bum occasionally etc. But being called a 'whore' and scrubbed raw definitely was not the norm.

duchessandscruffy · 16/09/2013 19:14

I haven't read the whole thread but I do have to say that my mum once washed my mouth with soap after I swore and I categorically did NOT have an abusive childhood. Quite the opposite in fact.

I am not advocating doing it in any way, and it certainly is not something I would ever do myself, but it's not always done in the context of abusive parents.