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Original poster

man shouted at my 3 year old for kicking

999 replies

ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 14:53

I took my children to chessington. and was in que for the ride. my 3 year old daughter had been kicking the man in front of us. ( i had not seen) He turned and shouted at her 'stop kicking me,don't you dare kick me' his tone and voulume of voice was a bit over the top. I told my daughter you don't kick its naughty. Then i told him she is 3 years old if there is a problem you talk to me not her. The woman who was with him said they have to be firm with their child because of some special needs he has and i said that may be your situation and you may need to talk to your son that way, But that does not mean its ok to talk to my child that way.

OP posts:
treaclesoda · 08/09/2013 19:11

but if you flip that logic the other way, it means that if you are out in public with more than one child then thet can behave however they like, because you won't punish one in case you punish the others too. Kids are smart - if they work out that this is your parenting decision, they'll soon decide that out and about is a free for all

Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 19:12

soda... no it does not make it any better if she had only done it the once but several people have said she must have done it several times for him to react that way and they don't know that could be the case.

OP posts:
Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 19:14

sirzy... there is no way i would take joy away from my other children because of one child. that not on the others done nothing wrong

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 08/09/2013 19:16

After some of the nasty comments on this thread,I'm not surprised the OP is being defensive.

IceBeing · 08/09/2013 19:17

wow...I ...wow.

So it's okay to yell at random 3 year olds now

Okay! I have a LOT of missed opportunities to make up for!

Sirzy · 08/09/2013 19:17

So basically your children know they can do what they want because you won't punish them because there is more than one child out with you.

usualsuspect · 08/09/2013 19:19

I wouldn't take them all home if one was being a pita.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 19:19

soda she was punished she had to be strapped him her buggy which she hates... some think thats not enough. i do for a 3 year old. and for me to take joy away from the other children would be very unfair. and my 3 year old would not even understand we were going home because of her. she would just think its time to leave even if i did explain. if i said you have been really naughty and we are going home because you kicked that man. she would say can we go on a train.

OP posts:
treaclesoda · 08/09/2013 19:19

not a random 3 year old, a 3 year old who had kicked him.

SilverApples · 08/09/2013 19:19

ghost, that's fine. You are free to raise your children how you see fit and make decisions about what is acceptable and how to handle things when they do something that crosses your line.
But so do other people.
They can decide that what your child is doing is not OK and may well tell them so,or shout at them to make them aware of how that stranger is feeling.
You can't stop them, it isn't against the law and it is the price you and your children may pay for their freedom to act as they please.
Piss someone off, get yelled at.

Sirzy · 08/09/2013 19:19

You wouldn't need to take them all home but out of that line so you can talk to the child propery and make them see what they have done is wrong.

Sirzy · 08/09/2013 19:20

Exactly silver.

YouTheCat · 08/09/2013 19:21

Did you get your dd to apologise?

Did you apologise?

Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 19:21

usualsuspect. i never understand it when people say about defensive. am i mean to just say nothing :/

OP posts:
IceBeing · 08/09/2013 19:21

ahh okay so as long as someone half my size has kicked me (or looked at me funny) I can abuse away?

YOU STUPID BITCH KEEP YOUR FUCKING FEET TO YOURSELF!

that kind of thing?

Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 19:22

youthecat...yes i have already said that.

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 08/09/2013 19:22

She did tell her off and strapped her in her buggy,I'm not sure what else you wanted her to do.

YouTheCat · 08/09/2013 19:23

Accept that if her dd kicks out at people they might well pull her up on it and say something?

treaclesoda · 08/09/2013 19:24

I don't think he abused her and called her a stupid bitch, did he? I thought he told her to stop kicking him.

Apologies if I've missed something.

IceBeing · 08/09/2013 19:24

I have absolutely no idea why this thread went like this.

It clearly isn't okay for a man to yell at a 3 year old.

Tell off, maybe...but yell? Definitely not.

SilverApples · 08/09/2013 19:24

' i never understand it when people say about defensive'

Grin You have 4 children.
Have you ever tried explaining to one of them why what they did was wrong, or why they can't have or do something they want to?

And all they say is 'Yes but...' without acknowledging that what you are saying has some merit, logic or may be the right answer?
That's your child being defensive and not really listening.

Bearbehind · 08/09/2013 19:24

Err, maybe pay enough attention to notice her daughter was randomly kicking people in the first placeusualsuspect

IceBeing · 08/09/2013 19:25

OP said 'he shouted at her'.

That isn't okay. I don't care what the three year old was doing.

Sirzy · 08/09/2013 19:26

But what the op has said really just sounds like he told her off. After at least the second time of her being a pest. Perhaps he did raise his voice but it was hardly nasty what he said and even the op only described it as a "bit over the top"

It seems she just had a problem with the fact someone dared to tell her child off.

SilverApples · 08/09/2013 19:27

IceBeing, I'm in my 50s and I don't swear at people when I'm cross.
Never have, It is possible to be annoyed with inconsiderate behaviour and not go completely Nuclear.