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AIBU?

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Original poster

man shouted at my 3 year old for kicking

999 replies

ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 14:53

I took my children to chessington. and was in que for the ride. my 3 year old daughter had been kicking the man in front of us. ( i had not seen) He turned and shouted at her 'stop kicking me,don't you dare kick me' his tone and voulume of voice was a bit over the top. I told my daughter you don't kick its naughty. Then i told him she is 3 years old if there is a problem you talk to me not her. The woman who was with him said they have to be firm with their child because of some special needs he has and i said that may be your situation and you may need to talk to your son that way, But that does not mean its ok to talk to my child that way.

OP posts:
gordyslovesheep · 08/09/2013 16:46

I'm just really curious about the not noticing thing - I have asked nicely about 5 times - yes I am that bored

I am not piling in - just hate being ignored

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 08/09/2013 16:46

You can't just say 'he shouldn't have shouted either', he shouted because of the kicking! It's not like he just stood behind you and repeatedly shouted at her for no reason, is it?

I think you're being very blinkered and silly, and certainly unreasonable.

Johnny5needsinput · 08/09/2013 16:46

I am as common as muck. My DD has a naice name though. I think Grin

But I would not ever have allowed her to do something like that. Never ever. I have a steely glare and a menacing tone and I do use them. Even at children that aren't mine.

MrsDeVere · 08/09/2013 16:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 08/09/2013 16:48

(ps, if we were all just bored, the odds would be that at least a few people would think you weren't unreasonable! Even if only to make things more interesting. But no: it's almost unanimous; you were unreasonable in the queue, and even more so now).

duchessandscruffy · 08/09/2013 16:48

I work in a very 'naice' school and we have lots of parents like this!

What were you doing while your child was kicking a stranger right next to you op?

Blu · 08/09/2013 16:49

3 is old enough to know that kicking people, anyone, is a total no-no.

Children have to grow up is social situations with many other people. If she kicks someone she should expect that someone to react directly to her. It would have been better if he had not shouted at her, be had an absolute right to say firmly to her "would you please not kick me, that hurts!"

You don't say that she was particularly distressed or crying at his response?

If you insist that no-one but you can ever say anything to your child you risk raising one of those kids who misbehaves out of your sight and says "you can't tell me what to do, you're not my Mum".

I would have been mortified if my 3 yo had kicked a stranger, not arguing back at him.

ilovesooty · 08/09/2013 16:50

She's repeatedly ignored questions about what she was doing while her child was misbehaving. I still think the phone is probably the right guess.

FrigginRexManningDay · 08/09/2013 16:52

I'm as rough as a badgers balls so I win.

Op YABU.

Chotter · 08/09/2013 16:52

I am calling bullshit. The OP has done this thread for a bet. Ten pages is pretty good going, tbf.

CatAmongThePigeons · 08/09/2013 16:54

My 19 month old kicked me once, without thinking, I shouted at him to stop. Most people would react by shouting when being kicked by anyone.

When DS2 is in the pram I make sure there is space in front of it. When DS2 is standing I ensure a bit of space around him.

I wouldn't stand in toddlers reach of another person.

The fact that you're not mortified by your childs actions speak volumes.

duchessandscruffy · 08/09/2013 16:54

I am also now wondering if this is bullshit. Either that or the op has finally realised that sibu.

CatAmongThePigeons · 08/09/2013 16:56

I also know parents like this at school, 'oh little toffee-chops would never misbehave, he's such a good boy at home' All while the child is jumping on another child, or hitting them.

It's never toffee-chops' fault. Never.

FrigginRexManningDay · 08/09/2013 16:57

I'll start kicking people,twill break her distraction.

ilovesooty · 08/09/2013 16:57

I am calling bullshit. The OP has done this thread for a bet. Ten pages is pretty good going, tbf

Or perhaps she's decamped to her thread on the other forum. Perhaps they sympathised with her about the nasty man there. Grin

Original poster
ghostspirit · 08/09/2013 16:58

i was in a que at chessington that is very packed people are standing very close to each other. yes i was holding her hand... no i did not see her actually kick so i don't know if it was an accident or not... but him shouting at her was not. it was an aggressive shout that what i meant when i said his tone was a bit over the top. maybe i did not see because i looked the other was for a second or 2. And for all them who don't have to watch their children because they 'know' they will never kick,hit,bite or what ever maybe you will have a shock to you one day...I'm sorry that im not the perfect parent with the perfect child. im sorry for them parents that think a stranger shouting at a small child is not a form of violence. and yes it is ok for a teacher to tell my child of...

OP posts:
TobyLerone · 08/09/2013 16:58

I bet they did, hun.

ilovesooty · 08/09/2013 16:59

Toby Grin

treaclesoda · 08/09/2013 17:00

Toby Grin

Sirzy · 08/09/2013 17:00

and yes it is ok for a teacher to tell my child of

well thats nice of you!

You need to accept that if your child hurts someone else then that person will be pissed off and they will tell your child off. sounds like they did a better job of that than you did.

I can be 99% sure DS won't kick a stranger, and if he did he sure as anything wouldn't then be going onto a ride at a theme park. actually he would be on his way home within seconds!

duchessandscruffy · 08/09/2013 17:00

Careful friggin I might raise my voice at you!

YouTheCat · 08/09/2013 17:00

Still haven't answered the questioned asked by a few here.

Were you on your phone?

treaclesoda · 08/09/2013 17:00

ooh, I was too slow at typing there and now I look like a copycatBlush

Johnny5needsinput · 08/09/2013 17:01

Your child deserved it.

You were wrong.

YABU.

But I'm common and bored.

gordyslovesheep · 08/09/2013 17:01

no the point was people DO watch their children - in a tight que you can't avoid watching them

If any of my children where to kick, hit or bite a strange adult I would be totally shocked - you are right - but I bet it wont happen - I have managed to get them to 11, 9 and 4 so far without them launching unprovoked attacks on grown men