Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that if you don't like children, then don't...

126 replies

gintastic · 24/08/2013 15:52

go to Frankie & Benny's for lunch on a bank holiday Saturday.

Lots of tutting and humpfing from the elderly couple sat next to me and 3 DC's. They were all behaving nicely, eating properly, good manners etc.

Couple in question had a nice discussion about how eating out was a luxury and children today are spoilt, and how they didn't know anywhere where you can eat in peace these days.

Well, it certainly won't be F&B's, they are very kid orientated!

Would you have said anything, given that they didn't say anything to me, just had a loud conversation that I could hear and did lots of pointed looks at my 3yo when he dropped his fork on the floor...

OP posts:
HopeClearwater · 24/08/2013 15:54

Don't worry about it - typical passive-aggressive old-person English behaviour. They read the Daily Mail.

CaptainCapybara · 24/08/2013 15:54

They were BU if your children were behaving but I would't have said anything just let them get on with tutting at nothing, they were spoiling their own meal out.

Thepowerof3 · 24/08/2013 15:55

Old bastards

LookingThroughTheFog · 24/08/2013 15:55

"Oh, this has been lovely, hasn't it, children? And what have we learned? We've learned how horribly rude it is to make loud comments about other diners when we're out. Well done all of you; you behaved brilliantly! Now, who wants desert?"

Original poster
gintastic · 24/08/2013 15:56

LTTF - I wish I had thought of that!

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 24/08/2013 15:56

I'm not really sure why they were tutting and humphing if your children were so well behaved?

Are you sure you didn't imagine it?

FitzgeraldProtagonist · 24/08/2013 15:58

Wait for it... The ageism lobby are on their way

Original poster
gintastic · 24/08/2013 15:58

I didn't imagine the conversation...

And when G dropped his fork, the tutting was actually audible.

You can see as you come in that the place is stuffed to the gills with families, can't understand why they chose it...

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 24/08/2013 16:00

Why is it ok (and I don't mean the OP) to be derogatory about the couple and use their age to do so?

FitzgeraldProtagonist · 24/08/2013 16:00

Bingo!

hermioneweasley · 24/08/2013 16:01

And their food is minging.

Perhaps you should have started a loud conversation about how Eskimos put their old folk out on the ice, and you can't believe we haven't adopted that, what with our ageing population.

WorraLiberty · 24/08/2013 16:01

They probably chose it because they like the food there

You are assuming that they don't like children, unless you actually heard them say it?

If your children were well behaved, they could have been talking about other children...or the children that were there last time they ate there.

Dropping a fork often makes people look round...they were wrong to tut.

But other than that, I think you might have misunderstood which kids they were talking about, maybe?

PresidentServalan · 24/08/2013 16:02

YANBU but it is very difficult to find anywhere to eat which isn't overrun with children at the weekend! Unless you have the money to go to a very expensive posh restaurant.

ilovesooty · 24/08/2013 16:02

Fitzgerald - your point is?

ilovesooty · 24/08/2013 16:03

Fitzgerald - your point is?

thecatfromjapan · 24/08/2013 16:04

Life is wasted on people like this. Seriously. How can you possibly get to that age and still be that much of a fuck-up? About life and how to live?

Basically, they ruined their trip out, with lots of poisonous thoughts, venomous feelings, and completely unnecessary hostility.

They took the shine off your time too - but at least you also spent the time with people you love, and you get to laugh about it afterwards.

Perhaps their lives are so crap that the only way they can cope is by finding scapegoats to direct their bitterness and aggression onto?

It's no way to live. Sad

They'd be better sorting out what it is about their current lives that dissatisfies them, and doing something positive about that. it is never too late to live joyfully.

P.S. I spent just short of a fortnight with dh's father who clearly is devastated that he is no longer young and is bitter as all hell.

WorraLiberty · 24/08/2013 16:04

Yes it's ironic that some people have such little respect for the elderly, yet they feel put out if they think people have little respect for the young Confused

ilovesooty · 24/08/2013 16:05

Would you say 'the SN lobby' will be here soon '?

Original poster
gintastic · 24/08/2013 16:05

Yes, I could have misunderstood.

I just don't understand why, if they wanted somewhere peaceful, you would choose a place like that.

Could well be that their experience prior was ruined by a child, but the to choose somewhere infested with them seems a bit perverse.

To my certain knowledge, there is a cafe rouge and 2 pubs that don't allow children within a 3 minute walk.

OP posts:
PoppyWearer · 24/08/2013 16:06

Must find out if my PILs ever go to Frankie and Benny's Grin

Coconutty · 24/08/2013 16:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thecatfromjapan · 24/08/2013 16:08

I see the points made about anti-ageism but I do think that there is a certain type of animosity directed at children/young people/young mothers that really is age-related - and it springs from unresolved issues wrt sexuality, worldly success, health, and the physical effects of ageing. Issues of power, and perceived power, too.

Human beings are very complicated and we don't always love ourselves and each other the way we should.

CaptainSweatPants · 24/08/2013 16:08

Cafe rouge is v kid friendly
Has a childrens menu

Maybe they didn't want a pub but a restaurant

With chains everywhere these days it v hard to find somewhere at lunchtime that is child free

WorraLiberty · 24/08/2013 16:08

thecatfromjapan

Why are you (and others) making assumptions about their age??

Even if they don't like seeing kids in restaurants, WTF has their age got to do with it?

Lots of young people don't like seeing kids in restaurants either.

I'm surprised the OP even mentioned the age of the couple because it's totally irrelevant.

Imaging if she'd chosen to mention their colour instead?

People would quite rightly jump in and mention the irrelevance of that too.

wheredidiputit · 24/08/2013 16:10

Yanbu.

I thought the same last week when we were on holiday at Park Holiday. A couple of older people complaining about the noise when the children were playing their fun/games and the children's entertainment.

As I said to DH it would be the last place we would go if we didn't have young children.