Would you leave your baby unattended in their buggy

[noblegiraffe]

...while you use the loo?

On another thread I mentioned not being able to get a buggy into a small cubicle and the suggestion was to leave baby outside.

Would I be overly precious in thinking 'No, I wouldn't do that'?

I do have protective instincts for my ds, they over ride my instinct to lock the door when peeing. They don't override my understanding if other people having greater needs.

I always choose the most discrete cubical though, so you might not notice the buggy half-out of the door.

Be cautious and protective, but try and temper it with a logical assessment of risk. I am far more likely to get mown down by a drunk driver or someone falling asleep at the wheel, as I push my pram down the street. But I keep doing that. People just don't look at risk logically when it comes to children. If there was no other option (ie you were not allowed to use the disabled access toilets) I'm sure many more people would view the risk differently. But because there is an 'alternative' (even though it's one they shouldn't do), people suddenly think that not only is it less risky (even if the risk was teeny tiny almost negligible to begin with) but it's also easier to use those toilets rather than put the pram outside a normal one and there you go, it's suddenly a case of 'my baby will get snatched if I leave it for a few seconds'.

Oh I'm not worried about the baby being snatched. More some fecker will make off with my bags/shopping/pushchair if empty

I definitely wouldn't do it.

I often go into town with just dd2 in her pushchair and usually, ill use either the disabled toilets that double up as a changing facility or I'll go into the cubicle, wheel dd in and then pee. I wouldn't leave her outside. It's just something that has never crossed my mind tbh. It's just what I do.

I know plenty of people who wouldn't think twice about leaving their dcs outside the cubicle though.

I can't say as I've ever questioned their motives behind it either. We have very different views. Ie I think nothing of giving dd2 a cheese sandwich from sainsburys if we are in town at lunch time, however, one of my friends would go buy spoons and a jar for her dc. That to me, is mental but she's got 4 kids and they've all been raised in the same way.

A lot of what you call "disabled" facilities actually have a pic of wheelchair and a baby indicating that the facility is for anybody requiring a bigger cubicle, for example if you use a wheelchair or use a push chair.

Hmm... I can honestly say I've never used the disabled access toilets just because I wanted a wee. I've just always managed to find a way around it, in my 4 years of having a buggy attached, rather than leaving my child unattended.

I agree that the risk is very small, also agree I'd be more worried about my handbag! It's just that with any risk to your babies, you avoid it if possible. So leaving the house: benefit to baby clearly far outweighs risk. Leaving baby unattended in public place: no benefit (having always found ways round it, again which have not been non-community spirited) but small risk. So I just haven't done it.

Can't say that I find it particularly neglectful! Just interested to hear what others do and don't think it should be considered the only option, regardless of your gut feeling.

I'd prefer to go in the accessible loo if I can. If it's a big public loo, those ones with ten or so cubicles, I'll wait until an end one is free so I can park the buggy in front to block/cover me.

However, if needs must I'll ask someone in the queue to mind the pushchair while I pee. Say if it's a small toilet with only 2-3 cubicles, in which case I'd just have to pee in front of everyone! And 18mo would run off or lick the floor or something if I got her out of the pushchair. I'll also leave her strapped in the pushchair in the swimming pool changing rooms and ask another mum to keep an eye if I need to pee before swimming.

The other day I was so desperate in the supermarket and the accessible loo was busy (with a wheelchair outside so I guessed the person inside might take a while) that I asked a passing mum with a baby to mind the toddler and pushchair. I peed spectacularly quickly but it still seemed a sensible decision to me.

Bearing in mind, if the 'disabled' toilet doubles as changing facilities/feeding room, I understand it's not ideal to some but I see no reason then not to have a wee while I'm in there changing DCs.

I leave the door open and block it with the buggy so I can have a hand on it if necessary, DS can see me and the buggy blocks the view of me on the loo!

Exactly picnicpie.

Fanjo, but that only applies to

a) locations where there are no baby-changing facilities with toilet inside and
b) days when you are alone with baby in buggy and not at eg baby group

I don't often need to take DD in buggy into toilets because I'm either making short trips where I don't need to go to the loo, or I'm with someone, or there is a baby-changing room with toilet or, in fact, the baby-changing facility is in the disabled toilet.

I can remember taking dd1 to the loo and leaving the door open on the public loo and pulling the pram in through the door so I had the pram handle in reach but the pram was sticking out through the door.

This meant that anyone coming in knew the cubicle was being used and couldn't I used the end cubicle so there was no need for anyone to wander past.

Yes, but very rarely.

Was sling user for tiny babies, and both mine walked very early so it wasn't at all a big deal to whip the child out of the pushchair and stand them next to me while I used the toilet.

There were probably only 4 or 5 months for each child when they might have been in a pushchair and unable to stand on their own two feet (Nap? Mine? No, sleep was for wimps...) and the number of times I needed to use the toilet when out and about in those few months wasn't many. End cublicle, pushchair visible. Likelihood of choking within those 30 seconds, given that they never choked on their puschair straps at any other point in the far greater number of hours they spent in them ...not great either.

Also, the number of child-snatchers in my area is, as far as I can determine, negligibly low. The number who would snatch the child and get past the queue of people waiting for the toilet without being stopped, even lower...and the number who would have wanted my basic Maclaren pushchair with no bells or whistles lower still (have never had a handbag or changing bag, always carried a rucksack, so nothing valuable on the pushchair).

Perception of risk is a stange thing. Taking your child for any journey in the car, or even crossing the road, is far, far more dangerous.

I would just take the child out of the pushchair and take the child in the cubicle with me. I don't think I've lived anywhere where the Great Pushchair Snatchers live. But I only had 1 child. It probably gets difficult when you take 2 in the cubicle.

The picture of a baby is to indicate that the changing table is in there, not that it is accessible to a pushchair!

I wish they'd introduce far more RADAR toilets and not have baby change in disabled loos. Would prevent abuse of facilities by those who think giving birth puts them in the same situation as disability.

usual I took the "competetive neglect" thread comment to mean neglect of the benign type. So not a dig at you or suggestion that your DCs are neglected.

And I love them too maltese

So do I Gobby!

I have used "disabled" loos when they're mixed with the baby change. This is not abuse. I change my baby and have a wee.
Why in god's name would I leave the cubicle after changing my baby then go to a non disabled loo to piss?
T'would make sense at all.

Never have I vacated the loo to find anyone (other than another parent of small child) waiting.
If someone else's need was greater than mine I'd gladly wait or use another cubicle and leave the door open.

Talk of "abusing" toilets is nonsense and ridiculous.

In quiet shopping centres I've left the buggy (with DD2 in) and 3yo DD1 outside the cubicle. I can see the wheels and DD1's feet and ask DD1 periodically if she's ok.

I don't think I'd leave the buggy by itself though. I know there's a 99.99999999% chance that it'd be fine, but I'd still rather not risk it.

I wouldn't, and never did.

But then I was totally convinced my children were so utterly gorgeous someone would definitely kidnap them. I never let go off the buggy handle unless I really had to.

teacherwithtwokids slings were great for that when mine were tiny.
I was quite proud of my ability to complete necessary ablutions with a baby harnessed to me.

It is abuse of disabled facilities. Started by businesses installing baby change in there instead of in standard loos or dedicated spaces.