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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my childminder to collect her child from a school...

249 replies

persimmon · 06/08/2013 22:18

.. about 5 miles away after she's collected my DS and her other mindees from their school? I can't figure out if I'm being mean. Basically, her child will start senior school in September. She applied to one outside the catchment and got in. CM doesn't want her child getting the bus, so is planning on driving to her child's school every day with all her mindees. The senior school is in a different place entirely and will involve a significant drive on busy main roads during school run time.

I just feel like we pay her to look after DS and don't want him stuck in a car for what could be almost an hour after school. Or is this normal for a CM to do?

OP posts:
ineedtogetoutmore · 07/08/2013 10:56

hmmmm on the fence obviously her child is always going to come first so can see her point. But not sure if if be happy about my child being stuck in the car for an hour a day every single day. September isnt too bad but a group of children stuck in a car for an hour in high summer? Not sure id be happy with that. Also the child minder must be mad can you imagine a car full of screaming / bored children every day...I hope she invests in portable DVD players
maybe you could see how it all plays out if the journey isn't great for her and her dc finds friends at school he want to get the bus home with, it may be a short lived idea.

StatisticallyChallenged · 07/08/2013 10:58

most policies have a default of either social/domestic and pleasure, or that plus commuting. you can easily include business use but I don't think I have ever seen it as a default. it's normally an option at quote stage.

KellyElly · 07/08/2013 11:00

It seems like some people think a CM is doing the parent a favour by looking after their child. My child minder is paid well, provides no food (I provide it all) and gets four weeks paid holiday per year. I employ her to provide a service and that's what she does. They have to be Ofsted registered, they aren't your mate looking after your kids. I think your concerns are valid OP and I think some of the comments on here are ridiculous.

hermioneweasley · 07/08/2013 11:06

I'd go with after school club. I agree, you're not paying for your DS to be in a car for approx 25% of his time there.

frogwatcher42 · 07/08/2013 11:07

statistically - I wonder how many people realise that they may not be insured for commuting if they haven't requested it. I didn't, and from what you say it backs up my situation that I found myself in where it was an added extra. I am beginning to think that from the responses on here, I am the only one capable of getting in a muddle re insurance and forgetting to change it depending on changes in circumstances and work.

I will email my friend and point this out but she may choose not to use her car if it is going to cost extra as she is short of cash. I am not sure what she thinks - I initially thought that she thought it all irrelevant as she hardly uses her car with mindees and was therefore happy to take the risk, but now wonder if she thinks she is covered. She may be anyway as she seems to be convinced it is on her standard policy.

She has been a CM for years and years. Do Ofsted, or other officials check car insurance covers mindees regularly (like taxi drivers for example) in which case she would be checked anyway wouldn't she and therefore must be covered. She is good and careful in other respects so I am confident she is fine.

MaryPoppinsBag · 07/08/2013 11:08

Yes Ofsted may ask to see car insurance policy.

MaryPoppinsBag · 07/08/2013 11:09

But not regularly.

frogwatcher42 · 07/08/2013 11:11

Mary - Then friend must have it covered as she would have to show it.

Again - I apologise to all CM's out there as I had no idea that you had to prove car insurance covered your mindees and therefore the few CMs who are not necessarily good (and there will be some as there are in every profession) could not get away with not covering their mindees on insurance anyway. I honestly didn't realise it was so regulated.

TheDoctrineOfAllan · 07/08/2013 11:12

Default insurance I think allows you to commute to and from your workplace but not use your car for any other business purpose.

frogwatcher42 · 07/08/2013 11:17

TheDoctrine - I know the answer to that one and some default insurances don't cover getting to and from work. Mine didn't. I looked into it after somebody I know had an accident going to work (or coming home, cant remember which) and wasn't covered. It went to appeal etc but the insurance company won. I then checked mine and I wasn't covered for the commute to and from work!!! I would never have known or thought to ask unless this person had had their accident.

Having re-insured, I found that most insurance companies I contacted did cover you, but certainly some didn't. It was a bit like business use - you had to ask for it at some companies. I thought that as you were travelling in your own time and not yet at work it would be covered under social, domestic or pleasure. But apparently not always. Shocking but true.

LoisEinhorn · 07/08/2013 11:19

I'm a childminder and I run mindees to after school clubs if required. I have business insurance. I also run errands if they can't wait and make it a learning experience.
Yes I am paid to mind children, but its bloody hard work for the £4 per hour I get (inc all the paperwork, planning etc).
If someone wanted me to exclude my other duties whilst looking after their child I would be charging more!
Having said that if being in a car for an hour a day was unavoidable and the parent was unhappy I would suggest another childminder. The welfare of my child would always come first.

LoisEinhorn · 07/08/2013 11:35

Forgot to add, I wouldn't take mindees on such a long journey everyday, I would end my day when I had to leave, unless the parents were happy for me to take them.

MaryPoppinsBag · 07/08/2013 11:51

Frog watcher - we have to jump through so many hoops. Which is understandable in this litigious age and for child safety. I don't get upset about it, much of the regulation covers my back as much as it protects the children in my care.

As a profession we are extremely vulnerable to accusations and criticism, with no colleagues to back us up if the allegations are unfounded. It's quite scary really. And one reason I want to quit.

frogwatcher42 · 07/08/2013 11:58

Mary - I am not sure I could take the stress or responsibilty. As you say it would be scary with more and more people willing to sue and less people willing to accept that sometimes, however hard people try, accidents just happen. Its alright thinking that you do a good job and do your best but I suppose mistakes can happen.

I would find it too stressful I know.

Sorry for hijack op.

HappyMummyOfOne · 07/08/2013 12:00

YANBU, choosing a childminder with her own children is always going to mean they come first. Whether it be their DCs activities, dropping at a friend, shopping etc.

I would not be happy with so much time in the car after school every day, does the school not have its own aftercare on site? If not, i would be looking for another minder.

Sleepyhead33 · 07/08/2013 12:41

School hours are long enough for a young child and involve lots of sitting. That hour after school before the dinner/bath/story/bed routine starts is vital for them to let off steam. I am not surprised that you don't want your child to be in a car for an hour after school 5 days a week. I would definitely be looking for more appropriate care for my child.

Also, as another teacher commented earlier, when I am paid to teach I am not paid to put my child first. I could not do my job properly if I was putting the needs of my child above others in the class. That is not the service I am employed to provide. Every parent should be confident that during school hours the needs of all the children in my care are equal.

Although most have said the cm is not bu, I actually do think she is trying it on a bit. if it really does mean an hour in the car every day for all the children she s paid to care for in order to suit her articulate needs then I don't think it is on. If she wants to do that every day should she really be taking on work as a cm? Maybe, I suppose. depends on the ages/needs of the children she is paid to look after.

I hope you manage to find something more suitable for your DS. Good quality Childcare is hard to find.

Sleepyhead33 · 07/08/2013 13:46

*particular needs!

magimedi · 07/08/2013 14:08

I would think it highly likely that childminder's DC will get fed up with Mum coming to pick her/him up & will want to go on the bus with friends. So I'd leave it for a bit & see how it settles.

claudedebussy · 07/08/2013 14:49

yanbu

i think if i were in your position i'd see how it goes. if it's a problem, then find someone else. the car journeys might be fun.

bamboostalks · 07/08/2013 16:37

£4 an hour! £6.50 per hour is the cheapest round here.

nokidshere · 07/08/2013 16:48

All the cm's I know have business insurance on their cars. It's not expensive, mine was just 19 quid extra.

The school in question is just 5 miles away - surely it would be easy to do a dummy run to see how long it takes? The 3 year old I mind does not get stressy or unhappy for the 15-25 mins it takes, he loves cars more than his mum LOL

if this is happening in Sept you need to do a dummy run so
You can look for a new minder in time if that's what you want.

nokidshere · 07/08/2013 16:55

Sleepyhead a 5 year old should not be spending most of their day sitting. Reception is about learning through play and there are not many (shouldn't be any) where a 5 year old sits down to formal learning all day!

Ofsted have no issues with school runs - after all the minder has been chosen by the parent and should be in
Agreement. If a childminder doesn't suit your needs then find one that does. Simple.

Dayshiftdoris · 07/08/2013 17:41

After school club / holiday club, IME, is cheaper than a childminder...

Only time they would have been cheaper than other settings was when he was under 1 and in a nursery... Of course I couldn't get one then as it would have been part time...

Original poster
persimmon · 07/08/2013 18:22

I'm confused by the amount of people saying use a nursery. My OP is quite clear that my DC is school-age.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 07/08/2013 18:26

Lots of nurseries run after school clubs ,they collect from school and keep them until 6 or whenever they close .

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