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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

to think this child is too old to be exposing himself?

999 replies

JenniBoo · 05/08/2013 15:08

Bit of a back story... was delighted when a young family bought the house next door. After the previous elderly couple (who would complain about noise and balls going over the wall etc.,) I thought another young family would be a breath of fresh air and that their boys (8, 5 and 3) would play with my daughters (3yrs and 3 mths).

The first hint that they were not our sort of people became apparent almost immediately. They are both heavy smokers - they must smoke at least a pack a day - but instead of doing it in their house, they (and their friends) congregate on the porch- the smell wafts across into our garden and through the kitchen window. One day it was so bad, you could smell it in my baby's bedroom on the floor above! I asked them politely if they would mind smoking indoors or at the end of their garden - but they were completely unapologetic and said they couldn't do that because in the house if might affect THEIR children - and that at the end of the garden, they would get wet!

She seems to let her kids run wild - she is never in the garden with them, and the noise is something else. The other day I had to complain because they were throwing stones at each other - one flew across into our garden narrowly missing my baby, who was sleeping in the pram. I went across to complain but the mother couldn't have cared less. She lined them up and made them apologize, but she was all "boys will be boys" and you could tell she wasn't really sorry.

Today has been the final straw though. I came out to find both the younger boys exposing themselves to my older daughter. They had climbed onto their trampoline and were waving them at her. The older boy was there too, but was just laughing. I went round to the mother and told her. . The other mother told me I was "being stupid" and that "they are just little boys" and that I should "get over myself".

I don't think a 5 year old should be getting his willy out in public. Surely if he did that in the class at school he would be in huge trouble? Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
AnyoneforTurps · 07/08/2013 22:39

She does have playdates, but I have a really nice NCT circles - and we have all girls, all pretty much exactly the same age

Oo, that's spooky, OP. All your NCT group have DC pretty much exactly the same age as your DD? What are the chances?

Come on, this thread is a wind-up, isn't it?

twilight3 · 07/08/2013 22:43

oh, thank you ladies, the picture is much clearer now Grin

SupermansBigRedPants · 07/08/2013 22:47

Even skim reading this took forever. My bloody head hurts now. What a crock of shit pot.

Sleepyhoglet · 08/08/2013 00:08

The OP seems a little spoilt. I mean, how long have these neighbour been living next door? If just recently then things will change. It is the summer holidays at the moment, but once they are back at school they won't have as much time to play outside. Also, the weather will be colder so I doubt they will be as inclined to get their bits and pieces out!

Xihha · 08/08/2013 00:58

"references to troll paraphernalia (goats, hooves, hairy hands, bridges) also count."
KateSMumsnet, I absolutely love this explanation.

Envy it would take a lot more than 1 incident of willy waggling and a thread on mn to convince my dh he wanted to move miles away to the type of house i'd always wanted, a drunk neighbour pissed on my front door earlier and that didn't work and he's definitely old enough to know willies are private (not doubting the op, just jealous)

nennypops · 08/08/2013 01:39

Oh dear, dh has just told me about his plans to buy two houses in Scotland where he proposes to set up nurseries full of trampolining willy waving little boys. And what a coincidence, they're both right next door to those properties OP fancied. Shame, that.

LaRegina · 08/08/2013 10:38
Grin

I dare not say anything else as I will probably be deleted again...

cjel · 08/08/2013 10:40

Jenni you are very quiet are you OK?

Floralnomad · 08/08/2013 11:01

cjel she's busy packing ,she sold the house yesterday afternoon and the removal van comes at 3 !

LaRegina · 08/08/2013 11:07

No no, Floral, she moved last night and is busy baking fresh scones for the cows in the field next door.

livinginwonderland · 08/08/2013 11:08

This is one of my favourite threads. Petition to move it to classics?

twilight3 · 08/08/2013 11:15

it's moving fast towards 1000 posts Sad

cjel · 08/08/2013 11:21

oh no don't say I've missed her!!

Floralnomad · 08/08/2013 11:41

I'm not sure the farmer will like the cows eating scones , she will be setting herself up for another neighbour dispute !

ilovesooty · 08/08/2013 11:42

It'll probably reach the end before Friday. Perhaps she'll start a new thread to update us.

pianodoodle · 08/08/2013 11:44

Confess to only just reading the first and last page here!

OP seems a bit Hyacinth Bucket Grin

pumpkinsweetie · 08/08/2013 11:56

Normal child behaviour imo, it's their garden not yours.
As for smoking, again, her garden not yours and she is right for not smoking in the house. Why should people congragate at the end of their back yard to please you.
Seriously wait until your girls grow up a few years, they aren't always sugar & spice. Mine pick their noses in the garden....

YouTheCat · 08/08/2013 12:11

Look, we're all going to have to stop posting on here now in order to leave enough room for the Friday update.

I really need to know what happens on Friday. Grin

twilight3 · 08/08/2013 12:14

I do hope the OP manages to resolve the situation in one way or another because she does sound very stressed....

phantomnamechanger · 08/08/2013 14:40

I can't believe the way this thread has gone - from being annoyed by mild antisocial behaviour of the neighbours kids, to moving house, just like that?

FrussoHathor · 09/08/2013 20:46

It's Friday night. I hope the OP will be back to update us on how the meeting with her neighbours went.

gordyslovesheep · 09/08/2013 20:47

OMG I hope she hasn't died by eating half a scone filled with poisonous stones

JenniBoo · 09/08/2013 21:34

I have made from scratch a huge tray of posh nibbles, and after agonizing over every wine Waitrose stock, got 2 bottles of Freixenet Cava Rosado Brut - which I thought struck the right conciliatory tone of "lets put this dreadful business all behind us..."

So, I'm pumped.. I'm primed... her kids are just normal boisterous boy... and it is entirely normal to get your bits out in public and throw stones at your neighbours... Thank you all for your help with this.

Wish me luck...

(and we have a house viewing at the weekend!)...

OP posts:
merrymouse · 09/08/2013 21:37

I suspect it is all going very well and they have all decided to buy a castle in Scotland and live there together

sameoldIggi · 09/08/2013 22:08

I do hope when they go next door there's a laptop sitting with this thread open on it...

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