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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you don't need 4 eggs and 7 slices of ham to make an omelette for one person???

273 replies

PenguinBear · 01/08/2013 08:09

This seems excessive to me... No-one needs that much in one omelette... Surely 2 eggs and 2 slices of ham would be fine?

OP posts:
grumpyoldbat · 01/08/2013 20:41

Because he's taller than me forever and male metabolism does usually mean they need more calories per day.

MrsKoala · 01/08/2013 20:41

I must say i split portions 60/40 as DH needs more than i do. But i also never leave myself hungry. So if there is not enough dinner, he gets a cheap roll to go with it or a cheap pudding to fill up on.

deleted203 · 01/08/2013 20:43

You do if you're a teenage boy in our house!

Or DH who does 14 hours on a building site.

curlew · 01/08/2013 20:44

"Because he's taller than me forever and male metabolism does usually mean they need more calories per day."

Not much. And he is letting you give him food off your plate!!!!!!

expatinscotland · 01/08/2013 20:44

'I said I asked a neighbour for help precisely because it would have been cheaper. And who cares about the childcare law, if you are trying to survive? Would you ask your mum or friend to register as a child care provider, if they were helping you out? I didn't think so!

If there is a will, there is a way.'

The good ol' bollocks I grew up hearing in the US, 'If there's a will . . . ', you are just lazy, need to pull yourself up by the bootstraps, if I can do it (in another country, years ago), you can, too but you are just smoking and drinking.

Who cares about the law? Gees, I would if it meant I could wind up with a big arse fine, criminal record that might cost me work and my child's safety.

BridgetBidet · 01/08/2013 20:52

Curlew, they need to find a way for both of them to eat as much as they need. Whether this is buying cheaper food or finding money elsewhere in the budget, or buying different more filling food.

But neither should be going hungry. They have to find a way around it. She shouldn't be going hungry but neither should the DP. Making a martyr of yourself doesn't make it right that either of them should go hungry.

Secretswitch · 01/08/2013 20:59

We are an eggy kind of family because they are an inexpensive source of protein. My dh supports the five of us on his wage, plus any overtime he can take. We have to budget very carefully for food. I never want to stand over someone and dictate what they eat, but damn it, sometimes I feel upset watching my quiche for tea, disappear as a snack into my teenage ds and his friends.
I wish I had the ability to be Lady Bountiful with food. It does my heart good to see people happily munching away.

curlew · 01/08/2013 21:10

"But neither should be going hungry. They have to find a way around it. She shouldn't be going hungry but neither should the DP. Making a martyr of yourself doesn't make it right that either of them should go hungry."

Of course neither of them should go hungry. But he should not be taking food from her plate. He just shouldn't.

grumpyoldbat · 01/08/2013 21:11

If I gave my DC to my neighbour I'd be arrested for child endangerment. Neighbour 1 regularly arrested, neighbour 2 aged 100, neighbour 3 only 80 but terminally I'll and needs our help more than us need her.

lottieandmia · 01/08/2013 21:29

I totally agree curlew - taking food off someone's, anyone's plate shows a lack of boundaries and respect. It's a horrible thing to do, especially to someone you are suppose to love.

BridgetBidet · 01/08/2013 21:32

He shouldn't need to. There should be sufficient food for neither of them to go hungry. There are ways to do this, changing your proteins to eggs, dairy and beans rather than meat. Eating more filling starchy food, which is often cheap.

Neither of them should be going hungry. At the moment one or the other of them is going hungry because there is simply not enough food to go around. So the type of food and the way they are shopping must change so they BOTH have enough to eat.

There is simply not enough food to go round. They need to change that somehow.

Typical fucking mumsnet. The bloke should be the one going hungry because he deserves it for being a man.

skylerwhite · 01/08/2013 21:33

Inspired by this thread I had a 4 egg omelette for dinner. Split it with DH though. Wink

MrsKoala · 01/08/2013 21:34

Have i missed the bit where grumpy says he takes food from her plate? I seem to remember a bit where she said she gave him food off her plate.

BridgetBidet · 01/08/2013 21:34

Yes you shouldn't eat food off someone else's plate.

But you shouldn't be left with so little fucking food that you're still so desperately hungry you feel the need to pinch someone else's food.

TheSecondComing · 01/08/2013 21:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

curlew · 01/08/2013 21:37

"Typical fucking mumsnet. The bloke should be the one going hungry because he deserves it for being a man."

Oh, don't be silly. There are two issues here. You are right, nobody should go hungry. Something needs to be done about that.

But one person (of either gender's) response to being hungry should not be to take the other person's food!! It just shouldn't.

MrsKoala · 01/08/2013 21:46

Briget - it depends how it's done really. DH eats really fast and has a massive appetite. i used to then give him stuff off my plate. he never asked, but i felt bad eating on when he had finished. i would then make myself toast or go hungry. totally martyring myself and he genuinely thought i was full as why else would i offer my food. He came to expect it and when i became pregnant i stopped offering and one day he went to take some of my chips in a restaurant and i had a melt down about being a fucking idiot hungry and him stealing my food and me not letting him steal food from the baby Blush

i don't think Grumpy has clarified if he's stealing her food or if she's offering it out of some misplaced duty and he is oblivious.

Secretswitch · 01/08/2013 21:46

The wasted food just about does me in, TSC. This happens with tins of tuna and soup in our family. If I know someone has used half a tuna tin, I can make dinnerfor my five year old with a jacket potato. If it is left to die behind the milk, I have lost both food and money.
I feel mean hiding packets of cereal and crisps but if I don't portion them out, one of my teenagers will eat half the box as snack.

CorrineFoxworth · 01/08/2013 21:51

TSC I'm shocked at your DH. I've seen excellent threads where you have done the most amazing meal-planning.

Would you like me to come round and kill him?

lottieandmia · 01/08/2013 21:54

Nobody should go hungry I agree - but from what the OP says about her DH being 'fussy' he is unwilling to eat in a way that would be more cost effective. Sorry if I got that wrong but it's bloody obvious that if you eat a protein only breakfast and you are not on a diet then you will have to eat more and it will cost more than if you eat porridge.

TheSecondComing · 01/08/2013 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OTheHugeManatee · 01/08/2013 22:03

I don't think 4 eggs (ok, maybe the ham) is greedy for a tall active man especially if doing a manual job. It seems like the issue here is a combination of OP's DH craving protein and being a bit entitled about what he takes. Controlling your partner's food is a bit dodgy in most cases but if the partber is being selfish and your budget is that tight it's a different thing.

Could you cut costs with more dishes based on pulses eg chick peas? Cheap as anything if you buy them dried and soak/cook them yourself, plus you can freeze them in bags to use when you need. Then eggs, ham, meat as a treat and everyone understands that and treats it as such.

Obviously if you're already doing this then apologies. In that case your DH is being a git and not so much greedy as fucking selfish and entitled.

Original poster
PenguinBear · 01/08/2013 23:01

Wow this thread now has so many replies... Wasn't sure which were directed at me and which were directed at each other so apologies if I am not answering the right questions:

No we are not considered a 'low income' family and are not entitled to those such benefits. I work full time in a well respected profession where it would be inconceivable to anyone who knows us that we might be struggling financially. (which makes me even more concerned about having to apply to the food bank as worried they will think we don't need it).
We are on a budget atm where literally every penny counts. Our friends are inviting us here, there and everywhere and we can't afford it... The dc don't understand why we can't do X,Y and Z like we normally do.

Luckily, we have already paid our English Hetifage membership earlier in the year so we are trying to make the most of that!

OP posts:
Original poster
PenguinBear · 01/08/2013 23:02

Heritage *

OP posts:
Xmasbaby11 · 01/08/2013 23:19

Cheese in omelette - vile!

It is a very large breakfast, but not unhealthy and better than eating lots of buttered toast (which I am currently doing). Eggs are a cheap source of protein, but packet ham is overpriced so I can see why you'd be unhappy about the cost.