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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

£1,730 Aibu that this is alot of money

242 replies

RiceAndP · 30/07/2013 13:09

Maybe I'm being judgey/pissed off on a Rainey day today. Friend of mine has just booked herself a weeks all inclusive holiday to gran canaries, leaving her 2 DC with her husband. He doesn't work and neither does she, has no intention of and says " Why should I". This will be the third time she has gone away this year not counting her four day trip away at Christmas, staying in a four star hotel.
Last week in the hot weather she brought an enormous swimming pool costing £180. I'm sitting there thinking shit, that would be my food bill for two months.
This week I would dearly love to take DC out for the day but cant afford to. I work but am taking this week as holiday.
I can never hope to have this sort of wage into my house of £1,730 each month? Granted one of her Dc has a mild disability and has an active life in all he does, goes to school every day. Has to attend hospital appointments twice a year for check ups.
She also gets full H/B and C/T so really that's a lot of money going into taking care of this household.
I need a bloody holiday just to get over the figures given to people that don't work... Aibu..

OP posts:
IneedAsockamnesty · 30/07/2013 16:01

You know what to do then right, jack in your job, make one of your children 'mildly' disabled and be rolling in cash...

Be realistic meow for it to be worth it you would need more than a mild disability not even knee capping would do it

Leg injuries on the knee or below the knee only get you lower rate mobility. Sledge hammer to both hips should do it and chuck in a lasting head injury to get any more than lower rate care.

Just incase anyone missed it this post is sarcastic as was meows.

ProtegeMoi · 30/07/2013 16:02

Murder is not right.
Carers allowance is deducted from income support.

And rice maintenance is also deducted so that's not on top as you say. Seriously your friend is telling you bollocks.

expatinscotland · 30/07/2013 16:03

IIRC maintenance is not deducted.

everlong · 30/07/2013 16:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsjay · 30/07/2013 16:07

maintence (sp) used to make up income support it was paid to csa then deducted from income support but It has maybe all changed now

farrowandbawl · 30/07/2013 16:07

Maintenance is not deducted - it's one of those where it is one minute, then not, then it is, then it's not...etc, etc, etc....at the moment, it's not...for now.

farrowandbawl · 30/07/2013 16:08

...as far as I know.

Hassled · 30/07/2013 16:08

Sorry but :o :o at "Murder is not right." Glad we've cleared that up.

JacqueslePeacock · 30/07/2013 16:42

I don't know. Some AIBU threads make me feel murderous. AIBU?

gordyslovesheep · 30/07/2013 16:46

poor you OP - you sound rather bitter :(

I suggest you give up work and disable one of your children - then you to can live in the lap of luxury ...because everything you have posted really is true I am sure Grin

really it's non of your beeswax now is it?

Hegsy · 30/07/2013 16:50

Don't know about your friend,however, from personal experience my mums husband left her nearly 3 years ago with my 16 yo brother at the time. My brother has adhd so mum was already getting about £400 a month for that after he left she was still just working 16 hours and tax credits were giving her approx £800 a month plus about £250 from csa, she got reduced council tax but no hb(probably would've been entitled but wouldn't jump through all there hoops) all in all between her 16 houra and benefits she was taking home almost as much as me and my husband both working full time. Even she admitted it was nuts! Though I never grudged her a thing. He put her through hell

chubbymomie2012 · 30/07/2013 17:02

Some of the wittiest people i "know" are on mums net! thank u all. Ye are better than Valium.

SugarSpunSisters · 30/07/2013 17:06

What a total load of bollocks.

What shocks me is the amount of people that jump in and agree with the OP and play the bingo. Are they that fucking thick as to believe a random poster on the internet as if the post is the gospel?

Original poster
RiceAndP · 30/07/2013 17:07

Hegsy thank you for you

OP posts:
IneedAsockamnesty · 30/07/2013 17:11

ADHD with out a co existing additional disability usually means lower rate mobility ( but only if the child never leaves the house without someone else if they do its no mobility) and lower rate care.

SugarSpunSisters · 30/07/2013 17:17

Come on now Sockreturningpixie ..

My brother has adhd so mum was already getting about £400 a month for that this is a statement of fact isn't it?! Hmm

Isn't it strange that all these people raking in thousands are always 'my mum' or 'a neighbour' or 'someone I know' ..it's never actually acknowledged by OP's of this ilk when people who are claiming particular benefits point out what pittance it actually is or they have actual facts laid out.

I'm a benefits advisor for carers/ex carers and try to stay off these threads. Sometimes I can't help myself Hmm

ParsingFancy · 30/07/2013 17:19

So your friend was working and making in total a bit less than you and your DH, Hegsy? Including substantial CSA payments.

Not quite the same as the highly truthful OP, then.

MurderOfGoths · 30/07/2013 17:19

Grin @ Hassled

D0oinMeCleanin · 30/07/2013 17:20

£1700 is waaayyy too much for a single person for 1 week.

We got 2 weeks all inclusive, 4*, mid season for 4 for just shy of £2500.

YANBU.

But that's not what you meant is it? If you mean her benefits are too high, YABU. I used to go to CP every year, exclusive villa for a week when I was on benefits. My Grandparents paid. The rest of the time I could afford to feed both me and dd1 or feed dd1 and put leccy on the meter. I couldn't manage all 3 at once.

DryCounty79 · 30/07/2013 17:22

Farrow Just for info, the small amount of Housing Benefit I receive is paid directly to me. At the time of submitting a claim, I was given a choice as to whether I wanted it paid to me or the Landlord.

garlicagain · 30/07/2013 17:22

Hegsy, how did your mum get £800 tax credits AFTER your brother left home? Was she cheating??

- HMRC says -

Child Tax Credit
Your household is not entitled to Child Tax Credit because of the following reasons:-

  • The household must have care of at least one child who is under the age of 20.
or
  • Children between 16 and 19 must be in full-time education or on an approved training course or registered with a careers service, Connexions or similar.
or
  • Children between 19 and 20 must be in full-time education or on an approved training course. They must have enrolled, been accepted for or started full-time education or approved training before they turned 19.

- Hmm -

Everybody gets reduced council tax if they live alone - 25% off, fyi.

coco87 · 30/07/2013 17:24

This is Mumsnet. The first commandment is "thou shall not judge". Now get back to work!

garlicagain · 30/07/2013 17:27

I like the way hegsy's mum couldn't be arse to "jump through hoops" to claim HB Wink Hoops like not being entitled to it?!

IneedAsockamnesty · 30/07/2013 17:28

Dry. Then you do not get housing benefit you get LHA. They are very slightly different but paid by the same office.

SugarSpunSisters · 30/07/2013 17:29

Yeah but she was already raking in hundreds, more than two FT wages remember, so can understand why she'd not need to claim another few hundred for rent Wink