To not know what to do jobwise?

[catgirl1976]

I currently have been in my current job for nearly 9 years but it's changed, I don't really like it and I am bored

I have the opportunity to go for another job in a different company but I can't decide what to do

My existing job is local to me and is only a couple of miles away. I can also do the role standing on my head.

The potential new job is an hour or so commute away. I have a 19 mo DS. I would be leaving the house at 6:30am and getting home 6:30pm. I don't drive so would be relying on trains and would have increased travel costs.

The existing job is permanent - the new job is a 6 month contract with a chance to go perm.

BUT - the new job is in investment banking which sounds very attractive and better then my current industry (energy trading). And the enforced me time on the train appeals - as does working in a major city.

DH doesn't seem keen for me to take the new role. I am torn. I think my CV looks crappy with 1 job for nearly 9 years and something fresh would be good for me and good for my career, plus it could be the foot in the door to a good industry.

Anyone got any views on what they would do?

The money is better in the new role but not massively so, especially after extra travel costs.

I'd look for a permanent job in the new field and move house to be near that.

sm I agree with your point totally ref man vs woman, my personal circumstance though was the basis for my post - me and husband work full time and are 50/50 with all stuff, it was more the long days and long commute that I was commenting on tbh. I would say equally to man or woman to think about effect on quality of family life when making these decisions.

I was going to say "not sure about the fixed term thing" and then remembered I turned down a perm duly job for an interesting 6 month one and never regretted it. When the contract came to an end I had another 6 month experience to add to CV and to help answer interview questions and I got another job straight away. I also do the longish commute thing and it is hard leaving early and getting home late but its great reading my book/paper and listening to music on the train.

Good luck - hope it all works out for you.

I wouldn't consider those hours and that commute. No way.
Regardless of the fact that your dh is a sahd, you'll pretty much only see your ds awake at weekends.
I would totally hate that with a passion.
I'm virtually a sahm (10 hours a week work) but despite the fact that I'm here for our three dc's pretty much 24/7, dh doesn't want a 'lean in' type of job. He's very well paid, but has avoided the kind of networking and long hours required to go further up the ladder cos he insists on a work life balance. A few years ago we were all talking about 'work/life balance' and now it's all 'lean in'
Time spent with the people you love is always worth more than time spent 'leaning in' to a career with finite timespan.
The fact your dh is a sahd helps massively though. If you we're both out from 6.30-6.30 5 days a week, and planning I have more kids in future, I'd say you were mad!

I had a locum post back in the day.agency could be gone on week notice
It lead to a ft post,gained great experience,ended up in ft fulfilling role
I simply don't see men on mn getting this grilling over a job when There is partner at home

I believe it's a family decision when either parent has the opportunity to change job.

DH is a contractor and the only contract he was offered about a year ago when he was looking was an hours commute from home. I work p/t and it basically meant I had to do all the pick ups and drop offs with no flexibility. We discussed it together and DH said that if I felt that it was too much for me/unfair on DS then he'd keep looking until another role comes up. I agreed he should take it because we can't afford for him not to work and it was better than not having a role at all.

Key thing is though we discussed it as a family. He could have said stuff it, only job on offer, I'm taking it there you go. Outcome was the same, but consideration for your spouse and DC should also be a factor in your decision.

Looking after a 19 mth old for long hours is hard work - although I see that your DC is already in nursery 2 days a week. Is your DH happy doing this? Is he perhaps unhappy because he will be doing more childcare than before?

I don't want to curb your enthusiasm, but it's not just you that you are making the decision for. Your DH is by default doing more solo childcare because of it - yet you expect him to be supportive.

Just to add, if I never went back to work I would certainly regret it. Love my kids, feel fortunate to be able to give them what they need right now, but it was never my aim to be a SAHM and I personally feel less than fulfilled.

I say go for it OP.

I am going to add to the doom too I'm afraid.

Two key points for me - having worked with investment banking HR on a regular basis, I think relying on the fact that you'll be leaving at 5.30 every day is highly optimistic.

Secondly, aside from the point you're only on an interim 6 month contract, you'll presumably be on a weeks notice. Have you factored in the fact you'll no longer be able to rely have the financial security of a sizeable redundancy payment and price period and potentially be without a job at one week's notice? If you've got lots of savings then that's fine but if not, you'll be starting from scratch with your new employer - no loyalty etc. I know you say you don't want more kids but no guarantee anyone will believe you when you're being c

Sorry - when you're being considered for a new job. Why can't they offer a permanent role upfront?

I think I'm in the minority but I don't think you should take it op, sorry. Oh and I work in same profession but I'm part time now so at home for most childcare.
He changed jobs about 2 years ago when our kids were 1 and 2, basically for the long term prospects. His commute changed from 15-20 mins to an hour and his job to more longer days. Now he doesn't see our boys on average 3 days a week and he really regrets moving. job prospects are better but at the end of the day it is just a job, not his priority and he is male!

I don't think a man with housewife at home be subject to this gloomy advice
society expect men to achieve,be risk takers and its accommodated
You're getting dealt the mutha card.missed school play!time away from kids!

As you are the sole breadwinner I think you would be better to look for a permanent role. The risk that the job ends after 6 months is a big risk IMO. If there is a restructure (and I work in finance and have just survived restructure no 4 in the last 5 years) then your job will go straight away.

You lose absolutely nothing by applying for the new job. Go into the recruitment process with an open mind: it's for you to learn about them as much as them to learn about you. You may well learn that they're dreadful or great in the process, so trust your instinct on that one. If it's all fantastic, you get the job and then go permanent, maybe you could move closer to the city? Very best of luck.

PS I wouldn't be under any illusions about your "me" time on the trains though: you're far more likely to be either going through Blackberry/iPad messages, thereby extending your working day, or dozing because you're so tired.

On train drink coffee,read your emails,faff about Internet,do some work if necessary
You'll not necessarily be yoked to work further just because you commute

I was more meaning the move to investment banking

I have the opportunity to go for another job in a different company

I assume from this you haven't actually got a job offer yet, just the chance to apply?

Go for it - in the current climate, there are no guarantees you'll actually get it, but it's useful to go through the application once in a while and get interview practice if you get that far. Interviews are two-way things, as they're also a chance for you to find out whether your doubts about the job have much substance or not. You can learn a lot about how you really feel about it.

Of course, if you go for it, and end up with an offer, you will still need to make a decision. If it were me, well, I'm already pretty certain contracting wouldn't suit me, so I only go for permie jobs. But that's me, not you.

I would be very careful if I were you, not because of the hours but be because of you being the sole breadwinner and thinking of becoming a contractor on one week's notice in investment banking.

I work in finance and since 2008 I went through 4 restructurings, survived 2, got redundancy for the other 2. In all 4 cases, contractors were let go wherever possible to save permanent employees.

If you do go for it (and I can well understand the attraction), check with a few recruiters about rates. 20pc premium over permanent salary seems too low: bear in mind contractors usually are not paid for holiday, do not get a bonus and get minimal or no benefits.

I am all for leaning in, and have been doing so in my own career lately, but I wouldn't swap a permanent job for a temporary one in the current climate. It is not true that you will easily get taken on or get another job straight away, so unless you have significant savings as a buffer, I wouldn't.

Job security in a recession is a rare thing to have, I wouldn't jeopardize this if I was the main breadwinner, as permanent good jobs are like hen's teeth. The commuting/more interesting job is all irrelevant really in the face of this IMO.

ScottishMummy I would offer the exact same advice to a man. Family Security, time with children and stability trump more exciting job.

Nah,I'm think the op gender us being used to beat her.shes a mutha will no one think of kids
Life isn't about trumps,or who gets to call it.it is complicated and clearly we all call it differently
Clearly this is a mn microcosm,unlike the usual mn of dh works ft,long commute.no one cracks a light

looking back now my children are nearly ready to fly the nest I would say take the easier option. Your children grow very quick and looking back it all goes in the blink of an eye. We were very hard up but I wanted to be a mum that was always there. I'm taking my daughter to look for a wedding dress tomorrow and I know I shall cry when she tries them on . I remember when she was little playing dress up. Spend as much time with your children as you can, you will never get a second chance

What's your point?her working will detract from future precious moments
The dad doesnt work,the child has ft parent at home and. 2day at nursery
With due respect your experience of kids isn't better because you don't work,and op does

I am challenging your assertion that a working mum will regret or miss out
Presumably rules your dp worked,so you didn't have to?did he miss out
Will you dh have a lesser bond cause he wasnt always there

My husband did miss out alot and regrets it. I work part time. I think my point is pretty obvious really.

Obvious to you,yes
Globally applicable,no