to get annoyed when DH speaks like this to waitresses, air hostesses, call centre/marketing women in front of me

[sodeveryone]

Example of a recent phonecall about his mortgage of which I only heard one end:

WHere are you from? Let me guess from your accent?

You sound irish, I bet you're Irish

No it's a very nice, very beautiful combination of features - freckles, pale and your accent sounds northern Irish. Where are you based? Ah I love Belfast.

to the girl behind a bar in New York a few months ago:

You have amazing colouring where are you from?

Oh really? I guessed from the colour of your eyes, they're hazel right?

(she leans in close to his face and says "no they're green")

DH: Oh I get it now, green eyes, black hair, that's very rare

(Turns to me and affirms) That's very rare you know!

A young moisty

I have to go bleach my brain out now. Bye.

Crikey. I don't know where to start!

OP, why do you refer to 'his' mortgage? Do you have any property of your own?

Is your husband a make-up artist? His close interest in women's colouring seems ... unusually specific.

Personal remarks are rude. There's no two ways about it. Complimenting someone's outfit is different because it's something they've "done". Skin tone is genetic and the comment is weirdly intimate. It's a bit like commenting on her nipples or shapely backside.

He is not rude and weirdly intimate with male servants, is he?

I was on yesterday's thread and am now rather concerned about you as well as your SIL. I'm beginning to think the pair of you should run away together, leaving the brothers to their respectively detailed examinations of other women!

Is it insecurity? My ex (says it all really!) needed constant affirmation of his attractiveness, from women. Come to think of it, from men too. I'm not sure why he'd do it but it got on my nerves. We were in Paris once, and a coach load of Italian ladies were all buzzing round him. He was loving it (obviously) but then when they wanted to take photos of him and have their own pic taken with him, asking me to move out of the way (!!) I just walked away.

Ex was a handsome devil, though!