to be annoyed by friends who post 'thank you so & so for the lovely dinner' on fb, just showing off their wonderful social life

[fridgealwaysfull]

Surely if you've been invited to someone's house for dinner you thank them then. The only reason people post thank yous and tag the names of those present is just to show how popular they are and make others feel like we have no life. Winds me up.

[HildaOgden]

I can't for the life of me imagine why they didn't invite you.You sound so lovely.

[alreadytaken]

Facebook is often used for showing off, there are a lot of childish people using it. There are others who just like to share pictures with family and friends. If it bothers you enough to post about it on mumsnet and you feel like you have no life then invite people to dinner and post the pictures on Facebook

[80sMum]

Let's be honest here. Before Facebook existed, if you went for a meal with friends, you would thank them when you left and if it was a particularly special occasion you might follow that up with a thank you card or letter. You might possibly mention your lovely evening to a few close friends in general conversation. What you would NOT do is pin a photo up on the office notice board about it, for all your acquaintances to see. That's what Facebook does. It enables people to show off to everyone, behind the veil (very thin veil imo) of thanking someone for a nice time.
Posting that sort of stuff publicly on Facebook is not thanking the hosts, as that's already been done, it's saying to everyone else "I did something nice. What did you do?"

So, OP, YANBU.

[fridgealwaysfull]

80sMum....you're so right! Very well articulated, thank you :) Still think IANBU

[ilovesooty]

You certainly sound bitter and insecure to me.

[ChocsAwayInMyGob]

OP I think you're missing the point. FB is a jolly way of telling 3 or 4 people you had a nice time with them.

I often find that PMs on Facebook lead to long conversations which I don't know how to end! A nice message is fine.

Facebook is about going on in YOUR life, therefore you can say what you like about what you've been getting up to.

If I think friends are braggy, I just hide their post and look at something else. I don't think thanking people for a lovely time is braggy.

80sMum-You are referring to a time before FB was invented and times have changed. Nobody would ever pin a photo of a nice dinner they had on an office wall. The two things just don't compare.

[exoticfruits]

People have such trouble with FB - I really don't know why they go on! I started a thread about what was allowed- it is very short!

[BackforGood]

Thing is 80sMum - once I had got my photos developed, I would show my friends photos of a party I went to, or a holiday, or whatever else nice was happening in my life at that time. Equally, I would look at other people's - it's nice to see where people have been , or what they were wearing, or how their niece was growing up now, or whatever you are interested in. My FB page is that equivalent, just a lot quicker and easier, and cheaper (well, free).
I didn't get upset at my friends photos before FB, and I don't get upset at them now, with FB.
Maybe the difference is, I only have people on my FB page that I would genuinely consider to be my friends, I don't add everyone I happen to know.

[garlicsmutty]

Posting that sort of stuff publicly on Facebook

Most people post that sort of stuff to 'Friends', not 'Public'. OK, so if you have 874 friends, a lot of people might see it who aren't interested - however, most of them won't. Facebook will prioritise it to friends with whom you interact often ... Pretty much the equivalent of yakking down the pub.

Looks like OP should hide anyone who has a nice time
YY, exotic!

[80sMum]

Chocs I agree about long PMs that are difficult to end. I have switched off FB chat for that reason!

[SoupDragon]

Still think IANBU

Doesn't make you right though.

[Requiem]

YABU. Clearly. Don't we all like to tell our friends when we've had fun? Or do you prefer just to hear doom and gloom? This thread says more about you than your friend.

[ilovesooty]

I don't think the OP ever had any intention of considering any alternative points of view.

[burberryqueen]

get rid of FB , it is best thing i ever did.

[Sallystyle]

FB is about updating people about your life, the every day coming and goings and trivial shit.

If I had a good time at a friends I would mention it on FB. Why? because one of the things FB is for is talking about what you have been doing. I only have friends on there that I am actually interested about.

People really need to stop moaning about FB or get the fuck off it.

[Tommy]

the point is whether your FB friends are you real friends or just people you have added on FB.
Like some of the other posters have said, if I have done something nice I might out up a public thank you - mostly because I have a large circle of friends of FB and other people like to know what we've been up to and are pleased to see that people are having fun together. That's what friends do.
If someone comments along the lines of "why wasn't I invited?" (not in a jokey way) then it says more about the person writing that comment than anything else.
You can hide or unfriend!!

[HeyIJustMetYou]

YANBU. How dare anyone thank someone for a meal. What utter bastards.

[pleiadianpony]

It's a bit naff i think, but that's just me. I quite like to have a nose at what people are up to though so they are welcome to keep posting!. When friends of ours post about what they have been doing with us, I get a bit uncomfortable. I don't know why, I just feel like a load of work colleagues relatives, old school friends etc don't really need to know where i went for dinner on Saturday etc.............. It's nice for wishing people happy birthday, sharing big news, keeping in touch with a lot of people it would otherwise be hard to keep up with and the odd photo. Each to their own!

[cardibach]

So, OP, 6 thousand people (slight exaggeration :) ) post that YABU. One pops up and says YANBU, so that must mean you are right and N at all U? Odd reasoning...
ALso, I'm confused about this picture with the John Lewis cushions in it. You said the status was by one of the guests, then said the cushions and candles were there, not for the guests but for the fb public. How dies that work? DId the guest arrange the stuff, bring the cushions and light the candles? 'Cos as far as I can see from your posts the host has not posted to fb.
THe problem is, as usual with fb, having people who are not your actual friends on there. I love seeing my friends have a nice time! ANd yes, as BackForGood says, we did show off (in a non braggy way) our photos before fb. We did it by boring people with a full film roll...Now you can choose to look or not. Up to you.

[mercury7]

80sMum, you have totally nailed it with your office notice board analogy:o

[TerraNotSoFirma]

I don't mind seeing things like this, thank youd, compliments and lovely positive stories about ones DC and life in general.

What bugs me is the constant 'woe is me' 'what's the point in living' type status' or the cryptic ones that are begging for a 'what's up hun?' type response.

Those get hidden after a while, I do respond the first few times but when it becomes a pattern I have to hide them.

[TerraNotSoFirma]

You'd? Yous I meant.

[mercury7]

facebook is kind of like a shop window..I guess once you set up shop it's hard not to want your shop window to look as interesting as other peoples?

[manicinsomniac]

This is so weird, why on earth would it be bragging? Going round to someone's house for a meal isn't bragworthy, it's completely normal and almost everyone does it.

If it was 'had such a fabulous time tonight borrowing my BFF4eva's private jet and going for champagne cocktails in Rome, can't wait to go to Montecarlo tomorrow night' then you might have a point. But a bbq in a friend's garden??? No, YABU!