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AIBU?

To wonder why weddings turn perfectly normal women into selfish, thoughtless bitches

113 replies

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 21:50

A mixture of another thread on here and a situation i am currently in, but why do perfectly nice, sensible women turn completely insane in the run up to their wedding?

I'm going to a wedding in August and there is absolutely fuck all consideration for the guests, it's all about doing exactly what the bride wants and fuck the rest of us.

All this 'it's their day' is a load of crap IMO, if that's the case they should piss off and get married alone. If they have an ounce of common sense they should realise that they should be grateful people are attending and should not think people should be grateful they are invited.

Rant over!

OP posts:

Report

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:06

Seriously eliidh the 'I think, your wedding, do what you like' is exactly what I'm moaning about. Guests accept an nvite to a wedding to see people they care about celebrate their big day, they do not and should not expect to put up with any old shit the bride deems fit. Any bride who thinks that is exactly the thoughtless, selfish bitch I'm talking about.

OP posts:

ENormaSnob · 01/07/2013 22:06

Ooh i remember your thread.

You're invited to the worst wedding in the history of man aren't you?

auntmargaret · 01/07/2013 22:06

A big lunch? Seriously? Dealbreaker for me, I'm afraid, I wouldn't go

gettingeasiernow · 01/07/2013 22:06

YANBU. I recently heard someone I thought I really liked complain, without any hint of irony, that her sister had got pregnant in the year she herself was getting married. She said "I really thought it could all be about me this year". Like, everyone else's life on hold indefinitely.

thebody · 01/07/2013 22:07

Oh don't go to anything if it doesn't suit you.

Taken me 40 years to learn this.. Liberating!!

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:09

enorma if fear you are right!

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BrianTheMole · 01/07/2013 22:09

Thats a bit tight of her. I dont get why people dont take the time out to make sure their guests are happy. Or have the wedding later in the day if they cant afford two meals. But YABU to generalise, most people aren't like that.

Bowlersarm · 01/07/2013 22:10

I love weddings. They're unpredictable as well, in that the ones that you think will be great and you spend months looking forward to are dire, and the ones you regret accepting turn out to be great. You just don't know what will make a wedding a good one until the day is over.

I think that for the sake of one day, in general, you should just go with the flow and help make the day special for the happy couple. Especially if you are fond of them.One day out of your life is not a lot to ask.

There is always the option of turning down the

Bowlersarm · 01/07/2013 22:10

......invitation.

Eilidhbelle · 01/07/2013 22:10

Em, did you call me a selfish thoughtless bitch?

My wedding was all about my guests. And it was great! Because I'm normal, and the people I invited are normal, and there was no nastiness. If you're not happy with the invitation...wait for it....don't go.

Emilythornesbff · 01/07/2013 22:11

no.

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:11

Fair point brian it isn't everyone, but some women do go so ga-ga just because they are getting married.

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TheFantasticFixit · 01/07/2013 22:13

I wish I'd been more like this to be honest. I was so fucking bothered about everyone having a lovely time, it being as easy as possible (inc transport for guests between venues etc) for everyone that I totally put myself second. In the run up I had no one around me to help because they were all enjoying the fruits of my labour. I wish I'd stamped my feet a bit more and one a bit potty because then perhaps maybe the more selfish members of my family would have put me first.

One of the best things came out of all that tho - I married the loveliest man in the world

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:13

Not unless you did truly think 'it's my wedding, I'll do what I like', then yes eliidh, I did.

OP posts:

sweetestcup · 01/07/2013 22:14

Why? Nobody is making you go.

I know that! But the people you invite to your wedding are your guests, and these are meant to be people you care about and you want to celebrate your day with - so yes it is selfish imo if you dont take them into account, including basic things like providing food. Why would you make people you care about go hungry etc.

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:17

fantastic I'm not critising your choice at all but transport between the venues is another of my bug bears with this wedding. Unless you live in central London, I just don't get this. We have to meet at the ceremoney venue to get a feckin bus to the reception, which means our car is going to be in one town and we'll have to get a taxi home from another. It really is fuck all use to most people.

OP posts:

Eilidhbelle · 01/07/2013 22:18

Well, that isn't really what I said, is it? I said that you should be able to have the wedding that you choose (and pay for) and that people who don't like it (or say, slag your wedding off on an Internet forum) can choose to go, or not go.

But if it makes you feel better...

DameFanny · 01/07/2013 22:20

I must admit I was surprised when my lovely sil, who'd asked ds to be ring bearer, then asked via mil if my parents couldn't drive out to pick up ds after the ceremony and take him for the night. An hour away. Age 2and a half and we'd already organised a bed for him in the lodge we had to rent.

DH and I both pulled faces and the request went away. Sil is lovely though.

Antibridezilla · 01/07/2013 22:20

elidih you said 'I think, your wedding, do what you like' so I think you made your thoughts pretty clear.

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Thingiebob · 01/07/2013 22:20

No auntmargaret we've been told to have a big lunch (1.30 service) as the only food, other than nibbles, is the buffet which includes the evening guests.

I don't see the problem here. The wedding is on in the afternoon and food is provided in the evening. Perhaps the couple can't afford two lots of food?

Bowlersarm · 01/07/2013 22:20

OP you're sounding a bit mean now. I'm feeling sorry for your bridezilla. I'm sure their plans aren't in place just to piss you off.

Annunziata · 01/07/2013 22:21

Eilidh it's not always that simple. My brother is being a bastard about his wedding, but not going will spark a massive family feud. So I'm going and complaining about it on MN.

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TheCraicDealer · 01/07/2013 22:21

Why can't you drive your own car to the reception? Or is this bus ride some sort of organised fun? [shudder]

One of those double decker wedding buses toppled over in a field in Ballymena a few months ago. If those were your guests you'd be forever known as "so-and-so-who's wedding bus couped in the back field".

expatinscotland · 01/07/2013 22:22

I don't understand why people pander to this. Don't go! Just say no. As they don't care about the guests, they won't care if you're there or not.

Eilidhbelle · 01/07/2013 22:22

No, obviously I haven't, because you still haven't understood my point. Why are you going to the wedding of someone you clearly have issues with?

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