To think its not normal to be able to suck air into your vagina and then fart it out?

[VivaLeBeaver]

Dd can do this on demand. Not that I demand she does it but she thinks its hysterical.

And it's not just a little fanjo parp. It's like a trumpet which just keeps going and going. She's trying to play tunes now. Dh thinks she will be able to make a career out of it.

I've told her she'll knacker her pelvic floor.

Lighten up?

The "jokes" weren't even funny. And I should know because I'm well funny.

What a truly horrible thread. Absolutely vile and I am no prude. Sickening.

Whew, thought I was being weird by finding it uncomfortable reading an wondering why everyone seemed to be finding it so funny.

Thanks, all, for taking the trouble to reply. I think I'm with you, RevoltingPeasant, I just don't see it as sexualising a child - quite the opposite, in fact: to me, it's a child finding innocent hilarity in their genitals and exactly like the boy who tells everyone about his willy and/or pops a cocktail stick on it ( )

I'm none too sure MNers wouldn't make the odd potentially off-colour joke about a boy who announces His Willy Gets Enormous ...

... but I do take everyone's point, and am learning a little something about acceptable topics of conversation.

Maybe fanny farts are a source of intense sexual delight to some, and that's what I've been missing! If only I'd met a man who lurved 'em that much

Euphemia Mon 24-Jun-13 21:38:15

Christ that beats the boys with their "hand under the armpit fart" trick hands down!

I do hope she's showing off her party piece at school. grin

The boys will be all 😧 😄 🙏

Nice...she's 12.

I think it's the age Garlicnutty; a boy who is showing you all of these amazing new tricks their willy can do is generally a toddler. By 12 modesty has usually well kicked in so maybe because it's an unusual topic that some of us are finding it a bit odd?

I can imagine my 8yo daughter finding it amusing and offering to show me but she's still at an age where modesty isn't an issue.

I imagine most 12yo's would be horrified by something so personal being discussed on a public forum. You're never as anonymous as you think, either. I think this is where the discomfort is coming from and I'm usually a bit unshockable. Perhaps it's the same thing where we don't bat an eyelid at a naked toddler on the beach but think it's about time to cover up a bit when they're that bit older. I'm not a prude and naked bodies don't offend me but when a 13 year old kid's got his/her bent over arse on show at the beach, yeah I do think it's time to put a swimming cozzie on.

Strangely enough Garlic,my sons never made jokes about their willies.

As for lighten up....yeah right,lighten up when a Dad makes those sort of jokes.

"... but I do take everyone's point, and am learning a little something about acceptable topics of conversation"

Seems this thread has had a "spontaneous" invasion of "i'm not a prude, but...." types, many of whom very seldom venture onto AIBU but came here for the express purpose of Being Offended.

Clearly one can say cunt as much as you like on MN but not actually talk about them.

I'm sorry you feel that way Euphemia but i'm a Po faced old woman and don't like dirty jokes about children.
As for coming on here with the express intention of being offended I can assure you that there is nothing further from the truth.

I use the word cunt as often as anyone but not to discuss my 12 year old DDs genitals.
You know there's a difference between atrocious cunts and ordinary ones don't you.

Oh don't be silly Lazyjaney! I for one am always on AIBU threads so I hope you're not including me in your little made up band of merry prudes.
Also you often get threads where as soon as one poster speaks up in an opposing manner then others will come out of the woodwork because they were afraid or cautious of being the lone voice.

Grow up Lazy! It's not the topic per se it's the age of the DD ! The people you're talking about are not the pearl-clutchers of MN!

Because the OP is well known and well liked lots of others bit their tongues until they saw they weren't the only so called prudes.

Op - I'm amazed at you. Crass, disgusting, shocking. I'm embarrassed for you. Truly - really embarrassed for you. Am cringing here.

Weird

You are wrong on many different levels op - as is your DH

HQ should delete this thread

I am sure the op posted this in a light hearted way and would be horrified by some of the criticism here.

After all it is supposed to he an anonymous site and I certainly don't know the ops daughter!

To the poster whose school called social services at boys comparing willies I assume the school were blasted by SS about this waste of their valuable time looking at real safeguarding issues.

For goodness sake.

"Grow up Lazy! It's not the topic per se it's the age of the DD ! The people you're talking about are not the pearl-clutchers of MN!"

I am grown up thanks, certainly enough to know that the relationship between mothers and kids is infinitely variable, and people with repressed relationships always snipe at those with more open ones, full of righteous indignation. As to not being the pearl clutchers of MN, to all the "i'm-not-a-prude-buts" on here - congratulations, you've just been inducted.

And I'm also long in the tooth enough to spot flocking on a chat room from a mile away MN search is a wonderful thing

Janey, do you have a lot of time on your hands ?

I hope the thread gets pulled soon.

Go on then Janey,name and shame the flockers.

Who did I flock in after?

I'm quite happy to be called a prude if discussing a 12 year old girls 'flaps' makes me one.

Just coming back to this thread and I have to say I am somewhat bemused by these responses.

Although I agree with a few points made, some of the jokes were a bit , Im sure the posters didn't mean them in the way some people are making them out to be.

I've read other threads, some are even in classics, about funny/embarrassing things children have done, many are to do with their genitals. I believe the OP thought this is one of those situations, even if maybe some of her wording was ill judged.

Asking the thread to be pulled is a bit OTT. Rather than pointing out what is wrong with the wording and some of the jokes, some posters are twisting this thread into something more sinister.

Lazy - I actually find your suggestion insulting. I was the first to post that this thread made me uncomfortable amidst all the laughing and silliness. I did not lay into the the OP and i really am not a prude, but i don't care if you believe that or not!

I actually don't think the anonymity (spelling!) is the issue either, I do not want to be reading intimate details of an adolescent CHILDs genitals thank you very much. Had it been an adult, mildly amusing but hardly the funniest thing in the world, im sure we all do it. I would be and am equally uncomfortable discussing boys bits as well, i just don't like it.

I am not a prude, i am not going to be teaching my DD that her private parts are things to be ashamed of, but they are to be respected and kept private, its HER body, not something to entertain others with.

I was actually shocked that so many people thought this was acceptable and funny, i suspect it was the very sheep mentality that you suggested the pearl clutchers have (if only i had pearls to clutch), the first few posters think its hysterical, had someone had posted at the begining - ewww, are you sure you should be discussing this like this, the thread would have died a dignified death by now

Yes agree nameThatTuna. The jokes were ill advised but lots of things are on mumsnet and I guarantee if you are a regular poster like me at some point you will cringe at a comment you have made.

Personally I feel more uncomfortable about the ganging up on the op and the hints of sinister overtures of abuse here rather than worrying about an anonymous 12 year.