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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Playground etiquette, who was rude her or me?

136 replies

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:39

Not really sure who was being unreasonable here.

Took dd to the park today (dd is 2.4 park was very busy). One of the swings became available, the one on the end of the row, so I put dd in it and started to push her.

After about 5 minutes a woman and her daughter (would guess 4 year old) came and stood right next to me. Woman started talking to her dd "you can have a go on the swing soon" "this little girl will be finished soon" "it looks like you might have to wait awhile."

Dd did not want to leave the swing so I kept pushing her for another 5 minutes. Eventually the hinting got to me and we abandoned the swing.

So was she being unreasonable or was I taking too long on the swing and should have shifted sooner?

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Picturepuncture · 22/06/2013 16:41

Yanbu

SkinnybitchWannabe · 22/06/2013 16:42

I would've stayed even longer just to piss her off even more.
Cheeky cow

MrsCampbellBlack · 22/06/2013 16:42

Well 10 mins of pushing dc in the swing would have been enough for me.

Did nobody else get out of their swings first though? I would perhaps have just turned to her and said 'oh sorry, dd has only just got in, we were the last ones in'

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:44

Thanks skinny & picture I did actually think screw you bitch I'm staying all day, but she made me feel uncomfortable.

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RoooneyMara · 22/06/2013 16:45

It was quite a long go by the sound of it. My arms would have fallen off by then

StuntGirl · 22/06/2013 16:45

I would have said something similar to mrs above. Cheeky fucking mare.

chicaguapa · 22/06/2013 16:45

Who was on the other swings?

I guess you could have said 'we'll be on it for at least another 5 minutes' but I think the other person was being rude so I'd have ignored her.

RoooneyMara · 22/06/2013 16:46

The passive aggressive thing would have made me v cross though. I would probably have turned to her and said, sorry you're waiting, we only just got in, we'll just be another few minutes.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:46

mrs trouble was there were only two of the baby swings available (she looked big enough for the proper swings but they were busy too). The little boy next to us had only just started swinging.

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ParadiseChick · 22/06/2013 16:47

Ten minutes of swinging? I think you were being a bit petty.

CheeseStrawWars · 22/06/2013 16:49

I'm going to be the voice of dissent and say YABU. Taking turns and sharing is part of park etiquette, if someone's waiting for a turn then 5 mins seems perfectly adequate. I don't think the woman should have said what she did, but I think you were rather selfish/possibly PFB.

Cherriesarelovely · 22/06/2013 16:49

I had a friend who used to do this! If her ds wanted a go on something she would go and stand uncomfortably close to the swing or whatever, staring at the child using it. Of course the child would hop off straight away! I used to ask her not to do it as it was so unpleasant and unfair.

Eyesunderarock · 22/06/2013 16:50

Confused She wasn't being rude, she was keeping her little one happy and calm whilst waiting her turn for the swing.
You sound a very odd sort of person.

MrsCampbellBlack · 22/06/2013 16:51

Yes, I'm not sure she was being passive aggressive, just as eyes said - she was setting some expectations with her child.

I guess I'd think 5 mins was enough swinging if there were people waiting.

ParadiseChick · 22/06/2013 16:51

I had no idea so many people go round their day to day business with their hackles raised, looking for a fight.

Sirzy · 22/06/2013 16:52

I think if you know someone else is waiting it is nice to encourage your child to move onto something else when they have had a decent turn themselves (5 mins ish)

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:53

I thought it was possible I was being a bit selfish it felt like she was invading my space, she was stood right next to me the whole time. Her daughter wasn't remotely unset and started playing a game with the swing post.

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lljkk · 22/06/2013 16:53

Very PA of her.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 22/06/2013 16:54

I don't think she was being PA, just trying to explain to her DD that she would have to wait. Really not that strange.

Although if I'm at the swings and it looks like the current swinger (for want of a better word) looks to be installed for a long push, then I will distract and encourage DC to play on something else until a swing comes free.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:55

paradise what fight, she stood next to me and five minutes later I moved dd off the swing.

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WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 22/06/2013 16:56

Both of you. If someone is clearly waiting in a busy park it is rude to stay on for more than a couple more minutes, children need to learn to be aware when people are waiting and take turns. You have to stand close to the swings because if you stand far away another child always seems to nip in ahead of you. One comment to her DD that she would have to wait till someone was finished would have been fine, several pointed comments is rude.

schooldidi · 22/06/2013 16:56

That sounds like me at the park. It's not designed to get other people off the swing, I say that sort of thing to stop dd2 from going mental. Dd2 is 3 and is going through an "I want it now!" phase so if I don't keep talking to her about waiting her turn she starts screaming.

cantreachmytoes · 22/06/2013 16:57

I'm not sure if you spent too much time on the swing or not (not got to that stage) BUT she was VU and rude! I also don't think it was about entertaining her child and keeping her calm. If so, what would have been wrong with, "We're waiting for our turn, it's not our turn yet. Can you see the bird [or whatever]? Look how high s/he is going!" etc. She was just rude.

IsThisAGoodIdea · 22/06/2013 16:57

5 mins on a swing is plenty, especially if there's a queue.

But I wouldn't stand right next to you giving a running PA commentary.

You were both a tad U.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 22/06/2013 16:58

rhinestone I do agree partially, the only odd bit was that this was done while stood shoulder to shoulder with me. She wasn't pacifying her kid at all, kid didn't say a word through the whole thing but the mum kept dropping hints.

Daft thing is if she had stood 1/2 metres back and it was clear she wanted the swing is have shifted a lot quicker.

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