Playground etiquette, who was rude her or me?

[WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful]

Not really sure who was being unreasonable here.

Took dd to the park today (dd is 2.4 park was very busy). One of the swings became available, the one on the end of the row, so I put dd in it and started to push her.

After about 5 minutes a woman and her daughter (would guess 4 year old) came and stood right next to me. Woman started talking to her dd "you can have a go on the swing soon" "this little girl will be finished soon" "it looks like you might have to wait awhile."

Dd did not want to leave the swing so I kept pushing her for another 5 minutes. Eventually the hinting got to me and we abandoned the swing.

So was she being unreasonable or was I taking too long on the swing and should have shifted sooner?

toomany have you read the same posts that I just read?

The other child was happily playing her own game and not remotely interested. PAMum started in with her crap on arrival (before they'd waited any time at all).

How is OP turning her child into a bully? She's not learned that her wishes trump everyone else (she possibly wasn't even listening to the other mum, my boys wouldn't have been) but I agree with bridget that she may have learned not to be intimidated if she was aware.

Once again I will repeat it.

Child did not wait for 10 minutes. We left the swing 5 minutes after they mother and daughter entered the playground.

Child was not distressed about not getting on the swing imediately but was busy with her own game.

I'm I still very petty and immature though. Please be reassured that no child was harmed or distressed by the highly immature behaviour of the two mothers.

I think if you had had five minutes then you should have got off almost straight away - regardless of whether the other party knew you had had five minutes, you knew!

In this circumstance I would say to my child, "you have had a good long go and now someone else wants a turn. Let's count down together. 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1. Last push, off we go, well done for sharing". If you do this every time, they soon get used to it. And if they desperately want another go, I let them queue up again.

If we had just got on, I'd say either to the waiting parent or to the child, depending on the vibe we were getting, that we had just got on and would be a little while yet. No way I would take more than two minutes from that point though.

YABU.

Were there no other playthings available in the playground?
The woman was unreasonable and entitled.
5 minutes is not hogging the swing - 10 maybe
In that situation a breezy, "oh we've only just got on, I'll give you a shout when she's had her go" would have been better.

I too think TWBU to hog the swing for so long when somebody else was waiting

YABU - my daughter makes a beeline for the swings whenever we go to the park, and I would have done the same as this lady, but not stood so close. I would just be giving my daughter the running commentary, not to pressure you to get your DD off, but to explain to my DD what was happening, which would keep her calm. Maybe her DD wasn't upset because her mother was giving her a running commentary. I always just say, 'we will have to wait until this little girl/boy has finished'. If she is in it and someone is waiting then I think 5 minutes is more than enough. I think 10 minutes is too long to make another child wait. You can always go back for another turn later.

You stayed longer becuase she was invading your space.

She needs to learn some simple psychology. If she'd pretended she didn't care, but located herself in prime position, she'd have been in for a winner. Not that I'd do such a thing myself, oh no.

embrace if you had stood a normal distance and actually spoke to your child (not me through your child iykwim). I would have been off that swing within a minute. I do normally try and teach dd to share, had knows its not a concept two years olds grasp easily.

Even if the other woman annoyed you, it was a busy playground. If you'd have been on one of only 2 baby swings for 5 minutes before the woman arrived, you can safely assume that someone else was probably also keeping an eye on the swings - as they are usually the most popular things - but weren't wanting to stand close to you waiting.

So, you'd been on it for 5 mins, then kept the woman waiting for 5 more, then her daughter would have had her turn. Didn't you think about others in the playground when having your little PA tussle?

am I the only one not to understand why the child's lack of distress is seen as a justification for the OP? the child was waiting patiently and you wish to reward her for that by taking even longer. great example of parenting. my dd was a swing obsessive. she would wait very patiently around the swing until it was free. the lack of crying doesn't mean she wasn't waiting.

roastchicken it's not a justification, it was a response to other posters suggesting I was distressing the child through these very very immature actions.
I just wanted to point out the child was not distressed but was actually playing through the incident. Didn't say she wasn't waiting just that she wasn't at all unhappy.

YABU. Your child had already been on the swing for 5 mins and you stayed on for another 5 mins, knowing that someone was waiting. 10 mins is a long time. Agree with "roast chicken - just because the other child was waiting patiently and not kicking up a fuss doesn't justify taking advantage of that.

op you now seem quite pleased with yourself.

If anyone was being PA, it was the OP, who knew that she was hogging the swing, knew someone was waiting, yet chose not to move on

justmyview but she started it whines like a small child

bigbuttons not pleased with myself just finding the thread quite funny. It really is the most trivial issue (there's nothing to watch on tv, yes I am bored).

OP: "Am I being unreasonable..?"
Majority of MN: "YABU."
OP: "No I'm not."

Based on the OP's responses to this thread, I bet that this didn't happen the way she claimed.

So you admit you were being childish and you're quite proud of that fact?

I say things like that to my DS when waiting for swings mainly to emphasise to him that you take it in turns.
But in a busy park with children queuing I think if you made someone else wait for 10minutes then that is too long so YABU

You were both BU, you for being defensive & her for hinting so loudly.