to think that most women would rather have a girl/girls than a boy/boys?

[jellysandwich]

I have read so many posts with pregnant mothers who are upset that they are having a ds and in real life I find that mothers who have all boys or boys first, tend to denigrate them to mums of girls and put their daughters on pedestals. Mums of girls tend to not mind having no boys whereas all boy mums seem to feel sad that they have only boys. I have never come across any women who only wanted boy(s).

Am I right in thinking that most women want to have girls and wouldn't mind having all girls if they have more than one child, whereas boys are almost always seen as second best and not the desired choice of most women?

I would be so sad to have had two t girls...I got a ds first and for me there is a specialness about a little boy......for a mum. Another boy would have been great but I got a lovely little girl. If I had a third I would be delighted th another boy. Boys are just wonderful...as are girls of course.

YABU
I didn't care, but I think deep down wanted at least one boy. As it turns out, I have one of each. Strangely, once I had DD I felt less strongly about wanting a boy and would have been just as happy if DS had been another DD.

I have 2 boys, they are the biggest mummies boys..l have a 14 year old and 3 year old so you can imagine. I'm not a girly girl who likes shopping, my boys love going out with the Wellies and a couple of mucky fields do us fine.

Some of these posts are really sad.

And to think that one gender is better than another is truly shocking.

Could've written your post Sleepy. . Word for word!!

Boy oh boy I'm so glad I had a boy! Always wanted a boy!

I don't think it's that people think 'one gender is better than another' . . It's a longing that you can't control. Like most things in life, until you've experienced these feelings/thoughts then its not really fair to judge others.

I'm well aware how blessed I am to have 2 little boys, having suffered 2 miscarriages in the past & having watched friends suffer who can't have children. I love my boys with all my heart & would never change them BUT for me I will always long for a girl.

Maybe it's to do with my own relationship with my mother which wasnt particularly great that makes me have an inbuilt desire to have a mother/daughter bond.

It's not as straightforward as people thinking 'hmm I don't really like football, I prefer shopping & pink things so I'd love a wee girl'. It's far more complicated & inbuilt than that.

There's definitely some truth in it. Mums of boys have a much greater likelihood of suffering PND also.

Chubby I accept that there are many women and men who long for a girl, or would prefer all girls, and be disappointed to have boys.

What really grates on this thread though, is the handful of posters who have said that all women with boys feel like that, if they say otherwise 'they're just not being honest with themselves' or 'won't admit it'. How flicking presumptive and downright rude.

And I do have a girl! And yes, the sweeping statements about dollies and princesses etc are totally ridiculous

Flicking?

I meant fucking, obv

There are always posters on MN who speak for 'all' women and 'all' children. You can't possibly equate how you feel to everyone else.

Choco, I suffered PND after the birth of my second DS, largely due to the horrendous guilt I felt because I'd wanted a girl. Taken me a long time to accept that these initial feelings were out of my control but the guilt at feeling that way will always stay with me, especially now when I look at my gurgling, smiling beautiful boy & wouldn't change him for the world.

Exactly exotic. Thinking you speak for 'all' women would make you an idiot.

I am a mum of a boy, who wanted a boy and has no urge or desire to have a girl. maybe I'm not the norm but I'm definatly not lying to myself

I have to disagree, I really wanted a DS. I was over the moon when we were told we were having a boy. Wanting to start ttc no2 and would love another boy not fussed about a girl at all and I'm a big Girly girl myself I think is because I'm from an all girl family.

As a Mum of 3 boys what you said noelheadbands rings true, I don't spend all my time caring what others think obviously but it makes me angry if someone either openly or implied pities me or feels sorry for me and thinks I have missed out - just because they think like that. Cant control others thoughts, but why do these women assume because they think having a girl is a necessary life experience for a woman everyone thinks the same?

needaholiday with all due respect your post sounds a bit childish, kind of "na, na, na, I gave him BOYS and his ex never", its not a competition.

I know someone who has a DS and if she has another child wants a boy.

My grandma wanted a boy and had three girls. My mum was the youngest and my grandma resented her for not being a boy. When she was pregnant with me she wanted a boy just to keep her mum happy. I have a good relationship with my mum though and she never made me feel like she was disappointed about having a girl.

Trying to speak for "all" women is insulting as everyone is different. If we all had the same views the world would be a boring place

all boy mums seem to feel sad that they have only boys

I am a Mum to 2 boys and I don't feel at all sad. They are wonderful. So YABU. Have a nice day :-)

I have two boys and my Dsil has two boys, I ponder sometimes what having a little girl would have been like, to her and she says she is glad she never had a girl. I now think she is right, I would be worried to death about her.

I remember lying on the delivery table thinking "but what have they done with my boy?". And then having to pull myself together very quickly to say "Oh, she's beautiful", so that the baby wouldn't know.

Dd is great, really. But I did have a secret wish for a boy. And ended up with one of each eventually.

Only wanted boys.
Never wanted girls.
Got 2 boys.
= more than happy.
Find Op quite offensive really.