School are unable to tell yr5/6 children that homosexuality is normal.

[EleanorHandbasket]

It's in their policies. We've just been to a meeting about what they are going to be learning over the next yr with regard to health and sex education.

In the handout it says that 'any questions raised by pupils that require an answer that exceeds the agreed content of this policy, eg homosexual sex, will not be answered in an open class discussion. the matter will be referred to the individual parents for further guidance on their child's emotional needs.'

My friend asked what that meant for a child asking 'is homosexuality normal?'. the teacher replied that they woudl be unable to answer that question because they can't be seen to be making a judgement either way.

I don't really understand why they can't say,'yes it's normal'. End of discussion.

The teacher said that's because some parents may have issues around it and that they have to cater to all the parents wishes.

Well, I think that by refusing to state that it's normal, as in some people are homosexual and it is totally a) legal, b) not a choice, and c) likely to be the reality for many of the children being taught (whether that's personally or to do with friends and family), that they are in fact making a judgement.

My other friend (who is a teacher) thinks that actually they are doing teh best they can within the confines of the policy and parents' wishes.

I'm just really uncomfortable with it. AIBU? And is there any point talking to the governers?

Is homosexuality 'normal'

Well lets look at some demographic facts.

Based on the 2011 census:
6% of the country are aged 0 - 4 years old.
12% of the country are over 65 years old - of these 4.8% are 65-69.

5.1% of the population are Asian or British Asian
2.3% of the population are Black or Black British

A 1992 study of 8,337 British men found that 6.1% have had a "homosexual experience" and 3.6% had "1+ homosexual partner ever."

In 2005 the Treasury and the Department of Trade and Industry completed a survey to help the Government analyse the financial implications of the Civil Partnerships Act (such as pensions, inheritance and tax benefits). They concluded that there were 3.6 m gay people in Britain?around 6% of the total population or 1 in 16.66 people.

In 2010 a representative survey of 238,206 Britons, exclusive to their categories, found 1% identified as gay or lesbian and 0.5% said they were bisexual. A further 0.5% self-identified as "other", and 3% responded as "do not know" or refused to answer.

In total this adds up to 5% of people who do not identify as heterosexual.

And then the 2011 Census gives the following figures:
? 1.1 per cent of the surveyed UK population, approximately 545,000 adults, identified themselves as Gay or Lesbian,
? 0.4 per cent of the surveyed UK population, approximately 220,000 adults, identified themselves as Bisexual,
? 0.3 per cent identified themselves as ?Other?,
? 3.6 per cent of adults stated ?Don?t know? or refused to answer the question,
? 0.6 per cent of respondents provided ?No response? to the question.
? 2.7 per cent of 16 to 24 year olds in the UK identified themselves as Gay, Lesbian or Bisexual compared with 0.4 per cent of 65 year olds and over.

Normal is defined simply by what is common and widespread.

So if homosexually isn't 'normal'... well... neither are a lot of other demographics in the country.

All this comes down to is bigotry. There is simply no other way to explain why you can't discuss it.

Otherwise what this policy says is you can't discuss the over 69 year old as they aren't normal. Or toddlers and babies up to the age of 4 as they aren't normal. Or black or asian people, because they aren't normal. Because they make up similar or smaller percentages of the population of UK.

I am an observant Muslim and I think the school's stance is a load of rubbish. State schools are for everyone and cannot cater to the beliefs of individual religious groups. Schooling should reflect the values of society and since homosexuality is accepted by the vast majority of British people it would be silly to argue otherwise or sweep it under the carpet.

There's also a distinction between talking to kids about sex and talking about relationships, and the former can be tackled much earlier.

If parents at home want to explain that their religion finds homosexuality or anything else unacceptable then that's for them to do in their own time. Children will learn that homosexuality exists and is normal whether or not it is discussed in school.

Hello Shaun . Congratulations on your work - I'm going to watch your videos with great interest. I'm still very uncertain about how 'demanding' I should be about how my children's school handles the fact that they have two mothers, so I'm hoping to pick up some useful tips from your videos.

ageofgrandillusion in your post you said Well it's not normal in the conventional sense of the word is it - ie the norm? The norm is heterosexual relationships whereas, what, 1 in 10 or whatever being homosexual?

I am not sure I understand your definition of "the conventional sense of the word" (normal). Do you mean 'usual'? Or 'not abnormal'? Or 'regular'? Or maybe 'natural'?

Black hair is the most common hair colour of the human population, closely followed by Brown hair. Whereas, red hair occurs naturally on just approximately 1?2% of the human population.

So would it be (using that criteria) therefore correct to say it is 'normal' or 'natural' to have black or brown hair and 'abnormal' or 'unnatural' to have red hair?

I really would be interested to know your thoughts?

(I am sorry if anyone has already asked this, I've just started reading this thread and, rather impatiently, wanted to ask my question before I had read to the end).

YANBU.

At aged 10/11 you need to know these kind of things and to understand this aspect of sex education, as well as the practical stuff i.e. contraception, periods and such. I started my period the last year of primary, so I could've technically got pregnant if not learnt about sex. I was taught by school and my parents about the ways of the world. Homosexuality wasn't mentioned at all then, however - or not that I remember.

However at that age I had had my first kid which was with a girl, never kissed a boy til 14 - so it would've been nice to know that is OK (not that I would've been bothered about others opinions, I've always been quite strong willed and had the support of my parents no matter what).

I think the word 'normal' shouldn't really be used to describe anything because it instantly implies anything that isn't 'normal' is abnormal and therefore wrong. If you don't state something is normal you are also hinting to it's wrongness. If someone asked you 'Do I look fat in this?' if they answered yes or no, you'd have an answer. If they said nothing, you'd presume they were thinking that you did.