What was wrong with DD"s birthday food?

[TeapotsInJune]

My DD is two and I held a very small garden party/picnic. I am vegetarian and will not be buying meat for my daughter but I of course don't mind if other people eat meat! However, I personally won't buy it.

So for the food we had a couple of tables in the garden with egg and cheese sandwiches, salad, crisps, jelly, strawberries, raspberries and blueberries and apple juice and sparkling grape juice to drink, plus iced water. I also had ice cream to go with the jelly but that wasn't out!

I then had a text from one of the women who is more the friend of a friend saying "not being funny but u obviously make ur choices but u shouldn't expect em to b made by others luv kids where dead hungry when they got in."

I am pretty cheesed off actually! That was my daughters birthday - it isn't as if I marched around snatching burgers off the children! Was the food I provided okay? I thought it was ...

Fair enough, frog - I've just seen enough left over egg sandwiches in my life to give them a swerve. It's a texture/smell thing, I think.

Falafel tends to fit into the 'fist sized brown food' category, and is thus acceptable to picky kids, in my experience. It's only 'exotic' (and threatening) if you think it sounds exotic.

It's not that it's 'exotic'; it's standard fare.

But these are two-year old. People who have only recently ceased to be one.

And it's a picnic. The OP served picnic food.

As I say, no matter what, somebody and their ludicrously fussy toddler would have been unhappy, no matter what was served up.

The OP kept it simple, which considering it was for 2 year olds, was the best thing to do.

YANBU. Sounds like a lovely party, with very mainstream choices. The berries would have been a massive treat for my DC, as they are expensive where we are and I would have had to have discreetly stopped her eating the lot!

My DC will be getting an icecream cake as all the DC I know prefer icecream to cake anyway. (they just eat the icing). I wouldn't have noticed it was a vegetarian spread if you hadn't mentioned it, tbh.

No presents from the guests and no candles indicates to me at least that everyone there understood it was a "playtime" and not a "Party". Ant-vegie woman was weird and rude.

Fair enough, frog - I've just seen enough left over egg sandwiches in my life to give them a swerve. It's a texture/smell thing, I think.

Falafel tends to fit into the 'fist sized brown food' category, and is thus acceptable to picky kids, in my experience. It's only 'exotic' (and threatening) if you think it sounds exotic.

I agree with you about the texture/smell r.e. the egg.

However falafel would be far too strong/ spicy a taste for a sensitive 2 year old's palate.

As someone who was an extremely fussy eater as a kid, I can tell you from first hand experience that falafel both smells "funny" and tastes "spicy". (I like it now, but wouldn't touch it until my late teens)

Anti-vegie woman, that should say.

I would love to see the text Rude Woman would have sent had the OP offered felafel.

And I really can't see why a felafel succeeds where a small cheese sandwich fails..

Kids either eat all these things, some, or none, with little reference to any adult logic.

I have googled it and found the British Sandwich week website. Cheese is the second most popular sandwich filling and egg is the fourth. So I don't think this party was wildly bohemian with crazy food choices.

Frog spoon, loads of 2 year olds love felafel. Mine didn't, too rough, but he loved curry by 2. Lots of toddlers love olives because of the strong salt, mine would eat anchovies and capers on pizza, but not a grape or a cucumber.

This is why the whole premise of people trying to offer comments on what 2 year olds eat is ridiculous. And what they eat every day at home they will refuse at a party and vice versa. MN Would lose half it's content if toddlers didn't have irrational and changeable eating habits.

LOL at Freya's research.

So what is the top favourite sandwich? It's ham, isn't it?

Kids either eat all these things, some, or none, with little reference to any adult logic.

Most fussy kids tend to prefer bland foods (although there are a few exceptions who like strong flavours) which is probably why most fussy kids will eat simple foods like plain bread and butter, crisps, plain biscuits, cake etc.

We are also naturally disposed to favour sweet and high calorie foods, so most kids will eat chocolate, fried foods etc. Many fruits are fairly sweet, so kids will eat them as long as the underlying flavour isn't too strong e.g. apples. Vegetables contain compounds which taste bitter, which we are disposed to avoid because many poisons taste bitter.

Blu, yet more controversy! It is chicken, not ham.

Fine then, chips, just give them all chips.

I'm really surprised that egg and cheese are actually popular sandwich fillings. I guess it must only be due to dietary restriction, as every catered buffet I've been to in my life has ended up with a sad pile of unwanted egg and cheese sandwiches on the side.

Of course some kids are picky, and some adults will complain about anything. But since the OP did ask if there was anything 'wrong' with the choices provided, I'd say include more bland, savoury food. Not falafel, apparently.

Big bowl of chips then.

Sounds lovely for a gathering of 2 yr olds to me. And definitely more than enough variety for 2pm when most would surely be in between meals anyway?

I thought almost all children liked cheese. It's certainly a staple with my dc and their friends. And berries are really popular-they always get eaten.

I probably wouldn't even have clocked that it was a vegetarian spread so I'm sure no one will be thinking your food was weird!

I'm shocked they didn't bring cards and presents though. Did they know it was her birthday?

What a cow.
OP I think you did well with the food. My DD would have scoffed the lot.

For her 2nd birthday I was so determined that I wouldn't be mocked for putting an entirely vegetarian buffet on that I went totally overboard.
I had all manner of hot and cold, sweet and savory, it took me all morning to get it all ready. I think I cooked about 20 mini pizzas.

There were six children including DD... unsurprisingly we were eating leftovers for the rest of the week and I felt a right idiot!

I won't be making the same mistake next year, I'll be doing something similar to you. I will have a cake though

Food sounds good, she sounds very very rude

Maybe do some plain butter or jam sandwiches for fussy eaters.

An idea for a very easy,warm, savoury veggie dish that always gets eaten is pinwheels.

Take a sheet of puff pastry. Spread some kind if tomator pasta sauce. Sprinkle on grated cheese. Roll up and cut into slices and bake till golden.

(If you want non veggie you just sprinkle on shredded ham as well)

I'm not veggie, but some of our friends are, and DD does not eat beef.
She's having her 3 year-old birthday party next week and I've planned a menu almost identical to your own. (though i may now add the pinwheels alotofthetimes mentions above, because they sound yummy!

You just can't please some people. I agree with the "you're welcome!" response suggested above.

Also if my son was there he would have eaten the cheese sandwiches (after taking out the cheese as he only eats melted cheese) and crisps and that is all as he is fussy but I would have taken some food for him just in case

Don't think he would have tried the jelly and icecream as he is not a fan of messy foods and he likes to eat with his hands.

Maybe you should have included cake or biscuits or crackers?

she sounds like a right cow. and ignorant too. My DD is not a veggie, but she doesn't like burgers, sausages, sausage rolls, scotch eggs, ham sandwiches etc. She is 5yo. She went to a birthday party where the only food was hotdogs. the mum gave her a cheese roll. That was fine by me.... another party that she went to only served pizzas, which she doesn't like. All she had to eat was jelly and ice cream. She came home hungry, but that wasn't the hosts fault.

I think that you served a good selection of food, maybe next time chuck in a couple of jam sandwiches, or some cheese straws, or chunks of cheese.

But you cant please everybody and if a child really doesnt like everything they could always politely say so, like my DD does. She struggles when all that is on offer is sausage rolls and cocktail sausages....

I want to go to TinBox's party. Guacamole, falafel, nachos...

Also have a craving for an egg sandwich now. Hiding thread.

My son is two in a couple of months, and he has an omelette for breakfast every morning, plus at least one serving of berries a day. And he's a fiend for crisps. So he would have been happy with the food on offer.

I host a mums' group for five or six mums and toddlers once a week, and I always have berries and melon for the kids. Even my friend's toddlerwho pretty much only eats three thingswill eat berries. And my friend knows her son can be fussy, so she also brings along emergency crackers for him.

I think your selection sounds good. It's not as if you served boiled sprouts and rollmops, is it?

The tea sounds lovely and exactly what 2 year olds should be eating. It is exactly what I would serve for children (with different fillings but only because dd has allergies)

Processed party foods are full of fat, salt and sugar. They are not suitable for toddlers. Yes it's a party but it doesn't mean the children need to eat total crap. The jelly and ice cream was a perfect treat too

I wouldn't worry op.

And I think the op had plenty of snacks on offer - there were only EIGHT children there!!!

cheeky cow! My two would eat cheese sandwich & crisps, water & apple juice & ice cream.

Personally I would add a bit more crappy sugary stuff, but just my choice wouldnt expect everyone to dot he same

FFS you dont send kids to a party for a free meal.
Oh well just cross her child off of next years party

Btw if you think other people will be sniggering at you behind your back, you really need to find new friends as they sound awful

A perfectly reasonable party tea.

We'd have issues as DS1 has milk/ egg/ soya allergies, but I accept that party/ buffet food is generally incompatible with those allergens, so I feed him up first and take a packed lunch if necessary. Some hosts are aware and have made sure that he can eat a reasonable range of food. Some don't. I don't expect them to.

Generally toddlers are interested in running around and enjoying themselves rather than stuffing their faces anyway.

Sounds yummy, sounds sensible, sounds like you need a new guest!

If I was gilding the lily I'd bung some bread sticks & humus on there, but only cos mine was a bread stick fiend at that age, and they are cheap & easy to eat on the move. But that's just a very tiny side point and possibly cos I'm feeling hungry now!

Main point is... She was a guest in your home, not a VIP at a restaurant opening. Rude and weird. Should never be invited back again.

I'd be tempted to reply ' did you mean to send that text? It's a bit odd and can't work out why you'd feel that was appropriate given that you were a guest in my house. Very confused.'

In reality I'd ignore it though! Or do that pa thing of sending out a text to all saying thanks for coming and great to see you all... To make her feel guilty. Also would be telling all others about the text in passing in a confused kind of way