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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - No sweets or squash

443 replies

mamab30 · 29/04/2013 13:16

AIBU to not serve squash or give out sweets at a children's party?

Just wondering what parents would think of going to a children's party where there was only water to drink and just birthday cake to take home. For us that would be normal and I wouldn't think anything of it but just wondering if parents would be surprised at not seeing squash or sweets?

OP posts:
Sugarice · 29/04/2013 13:58

I hope your sausages are posh organic and burgers are 100% beef! Wink

malteserzz · 29/04/2013 13:58

Would you be happy to go to a party and only be offered water ? I know I wouldn't !

bbcessex · 29/04/2013 13:58

zukiecat wish your son had been at the party, they could have polished off the sushi between them!

TheSecondComing · 29/04/2013 13:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
mamab30 · 29/04/2013 13:59

I really am shocked at people's nastiness. Anyone can hide behind a computer/mobile phone. I wonder if any of you are actual parents in my kids class at school, wow, that would be enlightening. I came on here to gently ask what people thought and have received some really rude replies.

He's going to be 5

OP posts:
Original poster
mamab30 · 29/04/2013 13:59

Sugarice it is homegrown meat, my Dad's a farmer

OP posts:
sweetestcup · 29/04/2013 14:00

I just find it interesting how nearly everyone has been so quick to reply in a nasty way and have no idea about why I would want to serve just water/fresh juice and no sweets

No-one has been nasty - you asked for opinions and you got some, just because you dont agree with them doesnt make them "nasty". And in fact a poster did ask you what you thought was wrong with squash and sweets.

QueenOfFarkingEverything · 29/04/2013 14:00

mamab30 - that's AIBU for you. You'd have been way better posting in the food or parties topic (there is a parties topic isn't there, or did I just make that one up?)

Sugarice · 29/04/2013 14:01

mama AIBU is honest,you should know that or is this your first post?

You get peoples's opinions, gentle it isn't.

zukiecat · 29/04/2013 14:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheUnicornsGoHawaiian · 29/04/2013 14:02

breaker not healer (silly autotext) Smile

sebastianthesingingaubergine · 29/04/2013 14:03

Sorry op but you are coming across a bit smug. I think nowadays the party food offered is a lot healthier than in my day anyway. We never would have had FRUIT on the table when I were a lass! Regardless, every party my DS has been too there have been sweets. I don't think he would come away waxing lyrical about how refreshing it was to be at mamas party, only water and no sweets! How "different"....

Thurlow · 29/04/2013 14:04

I wonder if any of you are actual parents in my kids class at school, wow, that would be enlightening

Confused
Jewcy · 29/04/2013 14:05

I would think you were anal.

SirChenjin · 29/04/2013 14:05

You didn't ask 'gently' - you laughed at everyone who didn't give you the response you wanted! Much as I hate to say this, AIBU is not the best place to post if you are looking for 'gentle' responses.

Just go for the middle ground - serve water, squash, fruit juice, a few sweets, the fabulous cake and your non-processed BBQ stuff. Make sure you cook the meat very thoroughly given their ages, and pray for good weather. April/May in the UK (if that's where you are) is not renowned for great weather, so you might want to make sure they come dressed warmly and that you have somewhere to escape to when the heavens open.

EasterHoliday · 29/04/2013 14:05

at that age, I don't think no sweets / squash is in any way in appropriate. Guess it depends on your school, as it seems from here that in some places, kids get piled with sweets - it's just not the case at ours and you'll know whether it's the case at yours. The parents and kids would find it perfectly normal round my way.
A BBQ sausage in a (white) roll with ketchup and maybe BBQ sweetcorn on a stick like a lolly would go down really well with mine, especially if there were crisps on the side.
you are of course going to have trouble keeping the veggie kids happy at a bbq though.

Remotecontrolduck · 29/04/2013 14:06

Hmm only water sounds a bit dull, wouldn't be too bothered about the no sweets incase they scoffed them all and didn't want the BBQ.

I think you're being a bit unrealstic however and setting yourself up for major rebellion in the future by being too strict with food. DD had a friend who wasn't allowed sweets, fizzy drinks etc and every time she could get her hands on them, even aged 15/16, she'd have so much she was sick. Not good!

Sugarice · 29/04/2013 14:06

Personally I love bbq's for parties, much nicer to eat than soggy sarnies!

Plenty of OJ mixed with sparkling water would be a nice as suggested up thread.

Rowanred · 29/04/2013 14:07

I think sweets are expected at a kids party but definitely NOT squash. I don't buy this and most of the parents I know don't let their kids drink squash. I would have a choice of pure fruit juices though, or innocent smoothies as some kids don't like plain water.

Cloverer · 29/04/2013 14:07

I would roll my eyes at just water, probably wouldn't notice no sweeties if there was other sweet party food.

BackforGood · 29/04/2013 14:07

Thing is OP - on the first couple of pages, everyone told you that they'd think you were being a bit mean. Nothing nasty, nothing rude or offensive. You posted the question presumably so you could find out what people really think.
Then you started accusing people of being nasty (when they hadn't been) and refusing to believe that you might possibly be misjudging what people expect at a party, and after people start doing that on AIBU, then people do start to get a bit less patient with the OP.
You can't have it both ways - either accept what (virtually) everyone is telling you and thank them for their opinions, or continue to argue your point, in which case people will become more blunt.

MissLurkalot · 29/04/2013 14:07

Your party = Your rules!
I think just offering water might get some 'meh' comments behind your back... but if you're not bothered, stick to it! If you're determined to just have water, make it a bit more interesting than just 'water'. Buxton do small bottles, which my kids and their friends LOVE. I offered those and some fruit juice in packets at the last party and the water bottles were the biggest hit! They're only 250ml and kids love them.

www.ocado.com/webshop/product/Buxton-Still-Mineral-Water/20942011?sku=20942011&dnr=y

Or, how about making 'Mocktails'? Fresh fruit and fizzy water in big jugs with fresh fruit and ice in... Pop in cups with straws.
Kids will bloody love it.
BBQ sounds lovely....
No sweets, fine.
Your party = Your rules!

Take comments on here with a big pinch of sherbert! Your party sounds lovely!

KansasCityOctopus · 29/04/2013 14:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sweetestcup · 29/04/2013 14:08

I wonder if any of you are actual parents in my kids class at school, wow, that would be enlightening

What on earth is that meant to mean? You couldnt possibly be being judgmental and thinking you are a better parent could you??

Original poster
mamab30 · 29/04/2013 14:09

Juice mixed with fizzy water sounds good too.

It's in July the party.

OP posts:
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