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AIBU?

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HELP! Police at my door - apparently I have committed an offence.........

650 replies

TheAccused · 20/04/2013 16:20

Police just came as they have received a complaint against me.

Yesterday afternoon I nip to Tesco after school pick up. No P&C spaces so I park further down in a row of which is almost all empty spaces. I have a large 7 seater (4 DC) and get fed up of people parking so close that I can't get the toddler into his car seat without a struggle, so I park a quarter way over the next space hoping no one will park in that space as there are plenty more empty spaces next to it. I rush round, get a call from DD as she has forgotten her keys and is waiting outside the front door at home, so go quicker, get outside and find some BUFFOON has parked in the space I have parked over, so close that I can only just about get the door open on the toddler's side. The next space was empty!

As a see this, I hold my hands up and say to the DC, 'For gods sake, why did this idiot have to park so close' not seeing that there is a teenage boy sat in the car. I was not actually talking TO him at that point.

Conversation then goes something like this:
Boy shouts out 'my dad parked it not me'. I say something like, 'well you should tell him that I parked like this so I could get my child in car, now I can't, he could have parked further along'. He says' you should'nt have parked over the line'. I tell him I can park where I like, there's no law against it. He says 'well we can park where we like as well'. I tell him it would be common decency for his father to make sure the next car can open their doors. As I am in a rush, I try to squeeze DS through the door, hitting his head in the process. He starts crying. The boy in the next car laughs. I take the trolley back muttering 'tosser' to myself and give him an evil stare as I drive off furious at myself for not parking in the middle of 2 spaces and for even having a dialogue with the boy.

So police just came and said I had committed a public disorder offence as I was 'shouting, screaming and swearing' at the boy which has left him very shaken as he suffers from anxiety. The boy wants a written apology from me and if I do that, it will not go any further. Otherwise I will have be interviewed and give a written statement.

I have said that I am not apologising as I have not committed any offence and the boy was mouthing back to me very confidently and did definitely not look anxious to me! I do actually suffer from anxiety and depression and this has completely knocked me for 6.

The police will call me to arrange an interview next week. I can't believe it. I am pretty sure I did not even raise my voice. There was no one else about except my DCs and they are adamant I did not shout or swear (I have even started doubting myself). I am going back to the store on Monday to request the CCTV footage but they are not sure if anything will show up in the car park and it probably won't have picked up my voice anyway to prove I was not shouting.

I cannot understand how the police can tell me that if I write an apology, they will drop it, when they have no proof that I did anything. They were making out I was guilty Angry. Does this constitute a public disorder offence? I was just about to go out with the DCs to park before the police came. I am frozen with fear now.

OP posts:
poozlepants · 22/04/2013 13:24

Boy engaged OP not the other way round.
Boy wasn't some tiny child but an older teen. Presumably able to start a conversation with a grown woman but not apparently robust enough to have discussion with an adult in a car park.
Parking over the line in a Tesco car park is annoying but not an offence. OP says she did not raise her voice but loads of people on here now have her apopletic with rage shouting and swearing while he cowers in the back.
Parking right against somebody in a half empty car park is either just plain stupid or aggressively making a point about her bad parking.
Complaining to the police is just way over the top.
The police coming round is just mental.

Why do some posters on here assume the person who is posting is lying? It is possible that the teenager spun his Dad a whole load of bollocks at how horrible the OP was to him and how she had him quaking in the back. I bet the teenager was left in the car so OP couldn't bash their car in her attempts to get in to her own.

People get so ragey about bad parking and driving they lose all perspective.

Lottashakingoinon · 22/04/2013 13:29

Point of info Poozle The OP spoke first and in a rather insulting way about the boy's father, loud enough for him to hear and so not unreasonably to assume that she was talking to him.

FWIW I was pretty much on the OP's side until she started laying into everyone who thought she wasn't 100% right, calling other posters assholes and the like and using really very ballsy language whilst all the time claiming to be a put upon shrinking violet of a victim.

Damn I've done it again...acted like this is for real....

MadBusLady · 22/04/2013 13:32
Grin

I wasn't on her side, but only because of the comment doubting that the boy had anxiety issues, then in the next breath appealing to her own. Nobody is that unaware, surely.

SpecialAgentTattooedQueen · 22/04/2013 13:33

I was as neutral as can be before I first posted.

However, There's role models and then they're the OP's of the world who punish those who park correctly/don't really give a shit about their personal circumstances - or know FWIW.. Thanks for embracing lazy stereotypes and making it that much harder for those of us who don't verbally abuse children, but have a few kids.

Hope this is a wind up. Hope no one is this much of a bitter bitch in all aspects of their life.

OP, please get help, Your DC deserve better than a mother who bullies older children and 'punishes' cars that park near her. The example you're setting may strongly lead to a path where your DC grow up to be arseholes.

SpecialAgentTattooedQueen · 22/04/2013 13:36

I mean ON my first post. Grin New info changed my opinion drastically.

JenaiMorris · 22/04/2013 13:37

I reckon the boy thought she was talking to him when she did the arms in the air "idiot parking" thing. He then, reasonably enough, responded to say that it wasn't him.

At 15, the boy isn't a baby but honestly I think a lot of adults would have repsonded in a similar way.

A rational preson would have muttered to themselves - instead the OP ranted at the lad about how unreasonable his father was.

Essentially one person who parks like an arse because the rules don't apply to her met another who parks like an arse because he feels he has to prove a point. It's just a shame both parties' children had to witness it really.

Snugglepiggy · 22/04/2013 13:42

I go back to my original question Accused.Why did you not put your child on car from the OTHER side ffs?Even if its a titchy bit of an inconvenience assuming you parked a quarter over line,as you said,that means there is a huge space down the other side and you're in a big 7 seater not a tiny car.You see I can't get beyond that point.And yet in your latest post you assert you could NOT get your child in the car.Ridiculous.
The ensuing discussion with the boy and visit from police would then never have happened .But you don't like to admit that.

LadyBeagleEyes · 22/04/2013 13:46

Your'e not the first or the last to ask that question, Snuggle.
Op has managed to completely ignore it though, as it's far too sensible a solution and doesn't fit in with her completely made up rant story.

ComposHat · 22/04/2013 13:53

A quarter over the line? what is this fictional vehicle? A monster truck? A sherman tank? A Hum-V? C'mon OP what is this automotive leviathan? Does it cast a shadow as it rumbles down the street?

Given that you can comfortably park a long wheelbase Transit inside a supermarket space, I can't imagine how you'd need quite that much space. If it was a quarter over how on earth did he squeeze his presumably very narrow car into the space next to it (where he and his son on a tandem?)

If this was a metered or council pay and display carpark, what are the odds that the OP would have found hitherto unknown parking skills that allowed her to park her beast of a car?

CinnabarRed · 22/04/2013 13:57

Does it cast a shadow as it rumbles down the street?

TBF, all cars cast a shadow on a sunny day....

Wink
BeerTricksPotter · 22/04/2013 14:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ComposHat · 22/04/2013 14:01

Yes, fair point!

I meant engulfing the entire street, like you get in Sci-Fi films as the UFOs flying saucer looms over head!

AnyFucker · 22/04/2013 14:01

chocolate frosting is in the glovebox

< disappointed >

Lottashakingoinon · 22/04/2013 14:02

And what is in your glove box?

Chocolate frosting icing!

And I think she is going to complain to the police about them wasting her time because they have now said it's not going any further (a bit like this thread really Grin)

BeerTricksPotter · 22/04/2013 14:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lottashakingoinon · 22/04/2013 14:18

They WERE both tossers and the pot of chocolate frosting in my glove box will come in handy in the future especially in that Tesco (and I ain't afraid to use it!).

Yep Beertricksthere it is in the OP's usual non aggressive wouldn't hurt a fly style!

JenaiMorris · 22/04/2013 14:25

The car park staff are going to love the OP with her frosting.

I wonder how she's going to react when she gets a ticket and someone presses charges for vandalising their car?

Of ocurse a vandalism charge would be nuts (assuming that frosting cannot cause lasting damage to a car door handle) but it couldn't happen to a nicer person.

BeerTricksPotter · 22/04/2013 14:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheAccused · 22/04/2013 14:31

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

TheAccused · 22/04/2013 14:32

I have BEEN jumped on

OP posts:
pinkyredrose · 22/04/2013 14:38

OP you were jumped on because of your crap parking and equally crap attitude. You could've got your DC in the other side of the car couldn't you?

Mominatrix · 22/04/2013 14:40

What kind of person stashes chocolate frosting in their glove compartment? A) It will congeal from the frequent melting and hardening, and b) just WHY?

Lottashakingoinon · 22/04/2013 14:41

I stand corrected on the frosting issue then. A million grovelling apologies OP.

Throughout this thread you have set the rather argumentative and in yer face tone which seems to accord with what happened in the car park.

I have said/thought throughout that as far as the carparking issue itself goes I have sympathy with you, and that getting the police round was an over reaction. But what I have not been able to get my head round is your total inability to see that there are two sides to this, and that the only one of the few people here being insulting and inflammatory is your good self.

Still cannot believe that I am engaging in conversation with someoen who probably does not exist

LadyBeagleEyes · 22/04/2013 14:44

So as you're here anyway Op, can you answer the oft asked question on this thread, why didn't you go in the other side of the car, please?

cumfy · 22/04/2013 14:45

YABU there was plenty of room on one side.

You sound like you felt exasperated and entitled.

Not the best combination.

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