HELP! Police at my door - apparently I have committed an offence.........

[TheAccused]

Police just came as they have received a complaint against me.

Yesterday afternoon I nip to Tesco after school pick up. No P&C spaces so I park further down in a row of which is almost all empty spaces. I have a large 7 seater (4 DC) and get fed up of people parking so close that I can't get the toddler into his car seat without a struggle, so I park a quarter way over the next space hoping no one will park in that space as there are plenty more empty spaces next to it. I rush round, get a call from DD as she has forgotten her keys and is waiting outside the front door at home, so go quicker, get outside and find some BUFFOON has parked in the space I have parked over, so close that I can only just about get the door open on the toddler's side. The next space was empty!

As a see this, I hold my hands up and say to the DC, 'For gods sake, why did this idiot have to park so close' not seeing that there is a teenage boy sat in the car. I was not actually talking TO him at that point.

Conversation then goes something like this:
Boy shouts out 'my dad parked it not me'. I say something like, 'well you should tell him that I parked like this so I could get my child in car, now I can't, he could have parked further along'. He says' you should'nt have parked over the line'. I tell him I can park where I like, there's no law against it. He says 'well we can park where we like as well'. I tell him it would be common decency for his father to make sure the next car can open their doors. As I am in a rush, I try to squeeze DS through the door, hitting his head in the process. He starts crying. The boy in the next car laughs. I take the trolley back muttering 'tosser' to myself and give him an evil stare as I drive off furious at myself for not parking in the middle of 2 spaces and for even having a dialogue with the boy.

So police just came and said I had committed a public disorder offence as I was 'shouting, screaming and swearing' at the boy which has left him very shaken as he suffers from anxiety. The boy wants a written apology from me and if I do that, it will not go any further. Otherwise I will have be interviewed and give a written statement.

I have said that I am not apologising as I have not committed any offence and the boy was mouthing back to me very confidently and did definitely not look anxious to me! I do actually suffer from anxiety and depression and this has completely knocked me for 6.

The police will call me to arrange an interview next week. I can't believe it. I am pretty sure I did not even raise my voice. There was no one else about except my DCs and they are adamant I did not shout or swear (I have even started doubting myself). I am going back to the store on Monday to request the CCTV footage but they are not sure if anything will show up in the car park and it probably won't have picked up my voice anyway to prove I was not shouting.

I cannot understand how the police can tell me that if I write an apology, they will drop it, when they have no proof that I did anything. They were making out I was guilty . Does this constitute a public disorder offence? I was just about to go out with the DCs to park before the police came. I am frozen with fear now.

[Plomino]

Actually it wouldn't happen at my waitrose . Mainly because DS1 is a trolley boy ( and parking dictator ) and 'encourages ' people to park correctly . Except for the elderly lady who mistook the accelerator for the brake and managed to vault the adjoining hedge and landed on the gas cylinders at the petrol station...

[JenaiMorris]

It wouldn't happen at our Waitrose because the car park is run by a company that would ticket your arse with gay abandon.

[ChocolateCakePlease]

"It wouldn't happen at our Waitrose because the car park is run by a company that would ticket your arse with gay abandon."


I thought supermarket carparks had signs that state rules, one being to park between the lines.

I drive a Ford S Max. Not the widest on the market but not exactly small either. We would all love wider spaces but we don't so we have to make do with what we have and parking in two spaces is just so selfish like your needs are more important than anyone elses. I don't tend to park with the "mob" who tend to want to park outside the door (disabled aside) so i tend to park further back or right at the back and I still park between the lines. There is always the possibility that someone will park next to me but guess what - it's a carpark where other drivers park their car! More often than not NO ONE will park next to me but the self entitlement the OP has of how dare someone park next to me even though i pinched 2 spaces is just discusting.

I have 2 kids as well, at the beginning when i had baby carry carseats to get in and out yes it was a pain when the door couldn't be opened. But the drama some people have over getting their children in the car is silly. Since my kids have grown out of the baby carry carseat i have never had a problem getting them in and out because i either get in the otherside to strap them in or they are very small they can get in the gap and i lean in and do it. There is always a way around it - having the attitude of "i have kids i NEED 2 spaces" to just insane and dramatic. With the right attitude you can do fine.

[BoneyBackJefferson]

I keep reading these bits

so close that I can only just about get the door open on the toddler's side.
and
As I am in a rush, I try to squeeze DS through the door, hitting his head in the process.

How open could she get the door?

Its sounds like the bloke had parked about the normal distance away from her 7 seater and she hit the childs head because she was in a mardy.

[JenaiMorris]

Indeed they do ChocolateCake. As clear as day.

[BerylStreep]

Putting any sort of stuff on a drivers door handle is criminal damage. Regardless of whether it can be easily washed off causing no permanent damage. There is very clear case law on this. Do you understand? YOU WILL BE COMMITTING A CRIMINAL OFFENCE.

What complaint are you making to the police?

Also, for those who have suggested the father is a police officer - there is absolutely no evidence for that at all. The police were right to make enquiries following the complaint of abusive behaviour.

OP - you are making yourself sound unhinged. Honestly.

[2rebecca]

If the car park had loads of spaces and you're incapable of parking in a normal sized space then you should have parked in an empty area with an empty space at either side. If you're well away from the entrance it's unlikely anyone would park next to you in that case but how do you cope in car parks with no P&C spaces?
The police sounds OTT but deliberately using 2 spaces is very "me me me"

[lisbethsopposite]

hintofbream another one impressed at your bright brain on a Sunday morning. You weren't last out of the pub the night before

As this goes on, the more I think it is all a windup... Is it?

[HintofBream]

lisbethsopposite, no, not been in the pub, we had had pals round for supper and I was lying in bed while DH cleared the decks and washed everything up, allowing me to mull over the great conundrum of the opposite unused door in a thoughtful, peaceful fashion.

[Bogeyface]

I used to have a toyota previa, the widest MPV on the road at the time, and wider than 90% of MPV available now. I could park it in a standard space and get the car seat in and out.

Just saying.

[HintofBream]

Another thought: if it was so hard to insert the child through the tiny opening apparently caused by the other car's proximity, how could she get enough of herself through that gap in order to do up the harness, unless she is thinner than her child?

[2rebecca]

She could have just put the child in one of the seats on the other side of the car, or if car seat already fitted on the passenger side put the child in through the drivers side door and leant across to do the car seat up.
When mine were small that's what I did if there was insufficient room at one side.

[Lottashakingoinon]

Oh all those who are worrying about why she did not put her toddler in through teh other door I think I can put your minds at rest with two possible answers

1. This is a hole in her otherwise very entertaining and inventive little tale which she does not feel inclined to address or
   
   
2. To do this would entail walking round to the other side of the car: why on earth should she do that when the 'toddler' side is more convenient for her, which is after all, all that matters

[HintofBream]

Well summed up, Lotta.

[JenaiMorris]

Or Option 3:

Using the other side of the car would not have allowed her to demonstrate her righteous indignation and ire to the miscreant 15yo with sufficient dramtic effect.

[LadyBeagleEyes]

She's not going to come back and explain though, is she ?
amazed this thread is still here.

[differentnameforthis]

The moral of this story is to park properly, or as far away as possible, so you don't cause this issue. It's pretty stupid to complain about shit parking when you yourself, have parked shit!

Mind you, people here have been known to keep your car of you park like an idiot, or team together to trap you in.

I park as considerately as possible at all times, because many others don't!

I have had to haul my toddler in the opposite door & climb on the seat to strap her in. When I was (heavily) pregnant with her I had to climb over the passenger side to get in my car (painful with SPD) and was in agony for days afterwards.

Regardless of your justification, perhaps the teen was intimidated? How would you feel if a stranger had a row with one of your kids?

Apologise, you are in the wrong after all. At least that way it will all go away!

[MissLurkalot]

Well bloody said Differentnameforthis!

[YoniMaroney]

Park not like a cunt, or else you will be treated like one.

[cumfy]

So how's the complaint going OP ?

[rottentomatoes]

Bottom line is you parked badly. You were in the wrong to park like that even if it seemed like it wouldn't matter to you. Therefore you were in the wrong to slag off the driver who had parked correctly.

YABVU

[rottentomatoes]

I think it's very arrogant of you to slate the other driver who was parked correctly actually.
It's one thing to think to yourself, damn that's annoying I was trying to use tow spaces but another to slag off the correctly parked driver.

[aldiwhore]

Why the hell get involved in an argument with a passenger anyway? Regardless of their age? They can do sweet FA about it.

The OP sounds ranty and shouty, so perhaps the OP is more ranty and shouty than she thinks?

Police involvement is fair enough if a complaint has been made, even if that complaint is unfair, it's good to hear that complaints are followed up.

[lisbethsopposite]

I hate all these posts, "I park my MPV between the lines, always, with x children and toddlers and babies. I put them in the sun roof if necessary no matter how difficult and anyone who doesn't follow this standard is a selfish twat ."
Part of my decision to park on a line, thus occupying TWO spaces, is so I don't inadvertently scratch your car. And you would be willing to key me or deliberately block me in.
Supermarkets want to shoehorn in as many cars as possible. The lines are for guidance. They have no responsibility for vehicle damage. Can we condemn each other a little less?

[mirry2]

The op said she had parked a quarter way over the adjacent space. How did the other driver manage to park his car correctly in the 3/4 of a space left? - it must have been a very skinny car or he too must have straddled his car over two spaces.
sorry if someone has already raised this point. I haven't read all the posts.