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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

flat snobs and bedroom tax!

209 replies

limetictacs · 17/04/2013 19:13

I thought that with the housing benefit cap people would actually want to do a mutual exchange but I've been shocked at the amount of people who immediately go "no flats"- (we live in a 2 bed and are after a 3 bed house). One person even said that they needed a house as they had a dog (er- we have a young child and a baby on the way. Besides there are many other people who have dogs in the block!).

AIBU being pissed off that so many people are so snobbish about living in a flat? I'd like to add that these same people want to complain about having to pay for an extra room- some have actually complained to me and expect me to sympathise. It also pisses me off when people say they would move but there are no 2 bed properties available when there are way more people with 2 beds in my area than 3 beds. Aaaargh!

OP posts:
CloudsAndTrees · 17/04/2013 21:13

Then you are absolutely right. There shouldn't be any need for people to get into rental arrears, if there are smaller properties available on home swapping sites.

Original poster
limetictacs · 17/04/2013 21:14

WTFisABooyhoo I don't expect people to explain their reasons for not wanting to move to a flat. It is fair enough if they are disabled/have children etc. but there ARE people who just don't want it because it's a flat. And as I said before I have been housebound recently because of health problems so I would not expect anyone to live here who was in a similar/worse position.

OP posts:
Flibbertyjibbet · 17/04/2013 21:19

I lived in s 1 bed flat for years and would never live in a flat again. Noise frim people in communal hall and stairs, inconsiderate neighbours with music and tv late at night, nowhere to hang washing,hahave to walk to the park if you want to sit outside on a nice day, people in upstairs flats clumping about in outdoor shoes or scraping furniture around...
The final straw was the one who moved in upstairs who worked shifts and had no consideration at all for people who workef days and slept all night.

And that was converted house and not on an estate Grin

valiumredhead · 17/04/2013 21:21

I would never live in a flat again if I had a choice - not snobbery but plenty of experience!

WTFisABooyhoo · 17/04/2013 21:21

but how do you know it is specifically because it's a flat and not because it being a flat causes an issue for them that a house doesn't cause?

i mean if i was one of the people you spoke to and i said "no thanks, i dont want a flat" would you think i was being snobby?

MoodyDidIt · 17/04/2013 21:21

i have to say that i personally would not want a flat

but can completleyt understand your frustration as have recently exchanged via homeswapper (i guess thats what you are on?) but this was after about a year of constant time wasting idiots and people being snobby about the area i live in

people ought to have a bit more tact, after all, when you are in social housing we ALL get it for the same reasons - ie falling on bad times. and where you get placed is just the complete luck of the draw. so i can not stand people being snooty about certain areas and thinking they are great when they live in a certain area when they could just as easily have been placed somewhere they are now snobby about Angry

sorry, went off on a tangent there :o i really, really hope you find a place soon as its very stressfull when you need to move x

CecilyP · 17/04/2013 21:25

OP, there is nothing wrong with you wishing to move to somewhere you would prefer, but, by the same token, there is nothing wrong with others wishing to stay in something they would prefer. It has nothing to do with the government; you were allocated a suitable home from the stock that was available. You are, presumably, on a transfer list, but other families will have far higher priority than you for a transfer to a 3 bed house. And, in fact, you probably won't qualify for a 3 bed until your baby is born.

All you can do at the moment is stay on houseswappers, advertise wherever you can and make your flat sounds as attractive as you possibly can. You may find that, as people are actually hit by the bedroom tax, they might be a bit more interested. Or there may be a family who want your flat because of its exact location - you never know. In the meantime, thousands of families with a baby and toddler do manage in an upstairs flat - even ones with concrete stairs.

Original poster
limetictacs · 17/04/2013 21:25

MoodyDidIt thank you. That is exactly what I mean. I've tried to be concise and explain my point but I think sometimes things get misconstrued. It is more frustration that there are people who are in a position to downsize and help us out while helping themselves. I've also had a few time wasters which is especially frustrating and disappointing.

OP posts:
marjproops · 17/04/2013 21:27

my friend, whos elderly lives in a lovely ground floor flat ina block of 4, she has a terrace, seperate entrance, the lot. i would take a flat like that but the really naice ones seem to be sheltered for elderly with wardens around and good security etc. and quiet old lady upstairs.

that would be quite okay for DC and I.

seriouscakeeater · 17/04/2013 21:34

My MIL and Dm would love a flat because of bedroom tax and they are cheaper to run.

I seen a comment on facebook the other day stating that they NEED a two bed house in case they fall out with DP and he needs a room to sleep in, in all seriousness....I kid you not....

any way are we talking flats or apartments...

Bearbehind · 17/04/2013 21:38

I don't really understand this, many people chose to only have 1 child because they only live in a 2 bedroom, privately rented or mortgaged, property. Why should people who chose to extend their family beyond their current living arrangements, expect others to move to accommodate them just because they are in council properties?

WTFisABooyhoo · 17/04/2013 21:48

yawn

megsmouse · 17/04/2013 22:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MousyMouse · 17/04/2013 22:46

tbh, now in a house I have to deal much more with stairs than in a third floor flat...

TheRealFellatio · 18/04/2013 06:18

You won't be considered 'under housed' for quite a few years yet, will you OP? There is no reason why your children cannot share until over the age of ten or so. Isn't that the case?

TheRealFellatio · 18/04/2013 06:20

Sorry I am sounding like a cross-examining barrister there. Grin I didn't mean it like that, I just meant could someone clarify the rules on this as i'm not sure and perhaps it varies from LA to LA. I hardly think you are a priority though.

williaminajetfighter · 18/04/2013 07:21

If you want a 3 bed house why don't you BUY one instead of suckling at the tit of the nanny state and going to your local authority like a child asking for a new toy. FFs!!

usualsuspect · 18/04/2013 07:41

Because it's that easy to buy a house.

CouthySaysEatChoccyEggs · 18/04/2013 07:45

I have been told that the most suitable property for my family would be a 4-bed bungalow, all on one level, due to mine and my DS2's mobility issues, which has also been adapted to have a wet room because of my epilepsy.

Hahahahahahaha!

Do you really think that exists in the arena of Social Housing in the SE, or even in Private Rented at all?!

So whatever house I am given will involve compromises.

I would rather that my toddler who has hyperactivity with a 'high chance of ADHD' and possible Autism along with multiple life threatening allergies had his own room for safety reasons than I had a bungalow, as I can sleep downstairs if totally necessary, on days when I can't manage the stairs.

Everybody in Social Housing has to make compromises somewhere along the line, be it having to take a property in a not-so-nice area, or having to take a flat instead of a house, or having to take a house instead of a bungalow...

williaminajetfighter · 18/04/2013 07:57

I'm sorry usual but there are many people who don't get housed by an assn or LA and they have to make due in far less than perfect housing.

The OPs post is irritating for those of us who don't go to a local authority for our daily needs.

I honestly feel this country is being split into two - those who the local authorities and govt support with housing, social care, various projects and initiatives and those that the govt don't give a toss about and only exist, in the govts eyes, to pay taxes. The latter group just have to suck it up and get by.

BallerinaZeena · 18/04/2013 08:06

My DP and I plan to have children in a flat because that's what we can just about afford. Would love a 3 bed house but sadly don't have the £350k needed. £1400 on rent is a push enough.

BallerinaZeena · 18/04/2013 08:09

And that cost for a 3 bed would mean moving further from work and friends.

We all make compromises. If I really don't want 2 kids in a 2 bed then I might not have 2.

bettycocker · 18/04/2013 08:18

I used to live in a 1970's tower block. The actually flats were really roomy, light and spacious. The problem was the other tenants, used needles lying about, the piss in the lift and the fact that the lifts were often broken. There were some dodgy sorts who used to shoplift from the local Netto and go door-to-door trying to sell their wares!

I moved out and rented privately after someone tried to break into my flat. It was a shame, because the old council places were built to certain regulations. There had to be a certain amount of space for the occupants.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/04/2013 08:20

We both work and are living in a small flat with DD.

So a) it isn't that easy to buy a house
b) Not all working people are bitter and resentful of those on housing benefit. .I am not and the OP didn't irritate me.
c) would people stop being rude and talking to someone like they are a piece of shit because they are not working? You might have a job but you have no manners.

PearlyWhites · 18/04/2013 09:14

Well said fanjo