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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think that people who use cloth nappies act superior to those who use disposables?

242 replies

DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 18:47

I think I've just noticed this more because apparently it's National Nappy Week right now.

I have a friend of a friend who is always putting up photos on FaceBook about cloth nappies - such as the birth to potty ratio of how many disposable nappies one baby goes through, or the latest cloth nappy she has just bought.

When she was at the same children's birthday party she gave people a demonstration on how to use them too.

I think it is fine to educate people and promote being more eco friendly, but she does it with such superiority that I feel if I got a disposable nappy out I would be extremely judged.

I have another friend who is like this, but less extreme.

Very willing to be told AIBU - because I'm just basing this one two people.

(Also sorry for posting in AIBU twice in one day)

OP posts:

saycheeeeeese · 15/04/2013 18:51

Oh dear .....OP brace yourself! !

TarkaTheOtter · 15/04/2013 18:52

I don't use them but I think people who do have the right to be a bit superior about it. Every disposable nappy that has ever been used is sitting in landfill.

HollyBerryBush · 15/04/2013 18:52

My life was too short to pick shit!

Although fair play to those who have the time!

idiuntno57 · 15/04/2013 18:53

YANBU

My sister is evangelical on the subject. Disposal nappy users are the devil incarnate and don't get her started on formula...Kind of made me more determined to stick to disposables.

DeafLeopard · 15/04/2013 18:53

Well....she has got a point I guess.

I think people get a bit evangelical about cloth nappies, but you can't judge them all based on one person.

YouDontWinFriendsWithSalad · 15/04/2013 18:54

"the birth to potty ratio of how many disposable nappies one baby goes through"

I bet that's a pretty gobsmacking number. I agree with Tarka.

mrsminiverscharlady · 15/04/2013 18:55

YABU. I would guess that the person in question is feeling excited and happy about cloth nappies and feeling that she wants to share her hobby with other people. Your insecurity over your choice of nappy makes you feel that she is judging you. After all, if you are happy with your choice to use disposables then it doesn't matter what other people think.

In summary: get a grip. In a few years when your children are bigger and you've moved on to the next stage nobody will remember or care what kind of material you used to catch your kids' shit in

BedHog · 15/04/2013 18:55

I haven't noticed any superiority, but they do tend to get very excited about cloth nappies! Lots of Facebook posts of the latest brightly coloured specimen.

Personally I can't stand the things. All that extra washing of piss-soaked cloth, and making your baby look ridiculous with a big fat out-of-proportion arse. No thanks!

MrsMelons · 15/04/2013 18:55

Fine if you have the time but no ones business whether you do or don't use them. My best friend runs an eco shop but never used them as she didn't have time whilst running a business

dashoflime · 15/04/2013 18:59

What always puzzles me:

Why is there no campaign to ban non biodegradable nappies and force manufactures to only produce biodegradable 'sposies?

In the 80's there was a campaign to ban CFC's. It was successful and now all aresols are CFC free.

I get that re-usables are better for the environment but realistically, environmentalists are not likely to convince everyone, or even the majority to use them.

It seems to me, that promoting such an individualist solution to the problem, is really not strategic.

WidowWadman · 15/04/2013 19:00

When I did it, it was a lot of talking myself loudly into continuing because I needed to justify the initial outlay.

chicaguapa · 15/04/2013 19:01

I used cloth nappies and thought DC's big bottoms were cute. They looked like babies used to.

I can see why people are evangelical about it, but if you think she's acting superior, you probably need to look at why it bothers you so much.

AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate · 15/04/2013 19:02

YABU to judge everyone based on a sample of two. Based on a sample of two, everyone I've known called Beth has been a bitch. Doesn't mean it extrapolates out!

I use cloth nappies. I don't buy lots of new ones, but I don't see it's any more tedious than people who are always posting photos of their latest new shoes or whatever.

I do prefer them, otherwise I wouldn't use them. I do think they are better, otherwise I wouldn't use them. I do like to try and do my bit for landfill. If I thought they were rubbish, well I wouldn't use them, would I?

But I wouldn't comment or stare or any of that because, well, we all do what we think best. Many of my decisions would not be those others make. I only tend to mention it if responding to someone spouting one of the many myths about cloth nappies - like how much time it takes.

CrackleMauve · 15/04/2013 19:02

I only come across the real fanatics on the Internet. The people I know in real life use reusables for cost more than anything and often use disposables for night/holidays/long days out/nursery/etc.

I have one in cloth and one in disposables, I am not sure what that makes me. Insane probably.

Iteotwawki · 15/04/2013 19:04

I thought they looked into this and factoring in the energy & water required to wash them, plus the soap powder into the water supply, meant the environmental "cost" of reusables was the same (more or less) than disposables.

I used reusables because I thought they were lovely. And because DH insisted on them (but then he did agree to do all the laundry so not complaining).

VinegarDrinker · 15/04/2013 19:04

Er yes, YABU. Most of our friends/family don't even know we use cloth.

ParadiseChick · 15/04/2013 19:05

Why all the negativity towards them? I understand that it's human nature to scorn what you don't 'get' but ladies please, we're talking about what you catch shit in. Nothing more, nothing less, in fact it looks a bit pathetic when someone gets all sneery over nappies.

I work full time, use washables and funny enough I don't spend my time up to my armpits in shit, they don't take a massive chunk of time out of my life, yes some are cute but who cares? You don't see them.

Take them off, put them in the bin for washing, if there's a poo then shake it down the loo. Quick wash once every 3 days, onto a hanger from the £1 shop, out on the line, back in the drawer and that's it.

Why scorn?

I'm not smug but I'm getting fucking fed up of people feeling the need to belittle my choices when I'm not being all in their face with it.

HamAlive · 15/04/2013 19:07

YABU to base your opinion of cloth nappy users on 2 people.

But given what some people say about cloth nappy users, like "picking shit" "making your baby look ridiculous" and implying they have nothing better to do with their time, it's no wonder they feel the need to justify their choice.

It seems to be like most parenting decisions; defensiveness on both sides with people unable to talk about their choice without criticising the opposite choice.

SirBoobAlot · 15/04/2013 19:07

YABU.

Fact is, washable nappies are better for the environment, better for baby, and better for your finances. And I say that as someone who uses disposables (my health is shit, I wouldn't cope with another job to do, unfortunately).

Stating facts is not acting superior.

bedmonster · 15/04/2013 19:07

Well, YANBU in coming to that conclusion using your 2 examples, your friend sounds like a smug dick. But I don't think everyone that uses cloth nappies are smug, probably more environmentally conscious, but that doesn't necessarily equate to superior.
But I have never ever been arsed to even consider using them. I'm not going to live long enough to give a shit about, er, shit. Selfish? lazy? Almost definitely. Gives a toss? Definitely not.

ParadiseChick · 15/04/2013 19:08

That's what I was trying to say ham!

IceNoSlice · 15/04/2013 19:09

I would do the cloth nappy thing but frankly can't be arsed with the washing. My solution to the landfill issue: I recycle my used disposable nappies with a company called Nappies 2 Go, not sure if they are just midlands though. But I recommend them! For £7.50 a month they take all the nappies, wipes, breast pads etc and make them into plastic decking.

I don't work for them by the way, I just think it's the solution that was brilliant for me.

Original poster

DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 19:09

YABU to judge everyone based on a sample of two. Based on a sample of two, everyone I've known called Beth has been a bitch. Doesn't mean it extrapolates out!

YABU to base your opinion of cloth nappy users on 2 people

To be fair I did say in my OP that I was happy to be told I'm wrong or was being unreasonable because of the fact I'm only basing this on two people.

OP posts:

ShadowStorm · 15/04/2013 19:11

YABU.

You're basing this opinion on your experience of 2 people. I also know 2 (at least) mums who use cloth nappies. Neither of them have made any comment to be about nappies at all - unless you count one mum remarking that she had trouble finding trousers to fit her DS, as cloth nappies are bulkier than disposables.

TalcAndTurnips · 15/04/2013 19:12

Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot were all reared in cloth nappies.

Think on.

And Attila. And he was a hun.

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