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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that people who use cloth nappies act superior to those who use disposables?

242 replies

DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 18:47

I think I've just noticed this more because apparently it's National Nappy Week right now.

I have a friend of a friend who is always putting up photos on FaceBook about cloth nappies - such as the birth to potty ratio of how many disposable nappies one baby goes through, or the latest cloth nappy she has just bought.

When she was at the same children's birthday party she gave people a demonstration on how to use them too.

I think it is fine to educate people and promote being more eco friendly, but she does it with such superiority that I feel if I got a disposable nappy out I would be extremely judged.

I have another friend who is like this, but less extreme.

Very willing to be told AIBU - because I'm just basing this one two people.

(Also sorry for posting in AIBU twice in one day)

OP posts:
AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate · 15/04/2013 19:12

But you also asked if you were BU. And you are!

Iteo - that study was deeply flawed. The environmental impact of reuseables is heavily based on how you treat them. That study assumed all sorts of things like tumble drying (and, IIRC, washing at very high temperatures every time) that most people simply don't do. Nick Clegg got bollocked on MN for mentioning that study in a webchat during the last election.

IShallWearMidnight · 15/04/2013 19:13

the "study" assumed things like washing at 90 degrees, and ironing the nappies (ironing nappies fgs, who has time?), and didn't take into account reusing the nappies for subsequent babies. It was revised a few years afterwards showing that cloth nappies were 40% less damaging to the environment than disposables, but that didn't get the same publicity (wonder why?).

Original poster
DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 19:13

You probably need to look at why it bothers you so much

It doesn't bother me, if it did then I would switch to them.

It was just the whole demonstration thing at the party to a group of women about why cloth nappies were the best nappy to use. Hence why I would have felt uncomfortable getting a disposable out at that time.

OP posts:
Fuzzysnout · 15/04/2013 19:14

AmandaPayne I only know one person called Beth & she's a bitch Grin

Hippymama · 15/04/2013 19:15

There was some research done about the Eco cost of washing them etc, but iirc that research was carried out by a disposable nappy manufacturer!

I use cloth nappies and do so for lots of reasons. Yes, they are cute. Yes, they save me money (quite a lot of money as I don't go in for all the super cute nappies with ruffles and embroidery on them). Yes, they are better for the environment. It is true that every single disposable nappy EVER made is still sitting in landfill somewhere. That is a pretty damning statistic IMO. I use cloth sanitary protection and have done so for years (well before i became a mam) and i know i find them more comfortable than disposbale ones. For all these reasons, I use cloth nappies. That is my choice and other parents are free to make the choices they feel are best for them. I don't feel superior about using cloth nappies, I am not really bothered what other people put on their own children's bums. I just like my son to have cloth on his!

As others have said, they are easy to use and look after and if anyone is reading this and thinks they would like to try them then I would say go for it :) you don't have to use them all the time. Even one cloth nappy a day will save you money and means that at the end of the month there will be 30 less nappies sitting in landfill :)

lljkk · 15/04/2013 19:16

I think OP's friend of a friend might have a superiority complex.
Don't think most clothies are like that. We just like to gush with each other, not to the uninterested.

HiggsBoson · 15/04/2013 19:16

Iteotwawki Mon 15-Apr-13 19:04:32
I thought they looked into this and factoring in the energy & water required to wash them, plus the soap powder into the water supply, meant the environmental "cost" of reusables was the same (more or less) than disposables.

Definitely not. Vast amounts of water and chemicals are used in the manufacture of disposables. Total non argument.

Original poster
DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 19:16

But you also asked if you were BU. And you are!

Yes I did.

BUT -

My aibu is actually more the question in the title.

Why I will accept I am being unreasonable is because I only know 2 people who do it.

OP posts:
CreatureRetorts · 15/04/2013 19:17

YABU

I think you're over thinking this.

50shadesofbrown · 15/04/2013 19:17

I love the idea of them - cheaper in the long run, more environmentally friendly, more helpful for potty training, & agree with it all. My sister offered us free use of the ones she used for my niece. Tried it, gave up. Completely impractical in a small house in winter with a baby (obviously!) & no tumble dryer. We had 3 clothes airers up, trying to get the damned things dry. Couldn't get any other clothes done as nowhere to dry them. Service wash at the laundry 3 times a week was too expensive. Disposables & stinky bin in the back yard, here we go...

ParadiseChick · 15/04/2013 19:17

Wasn't that research years ago and based on boil washing and tumble drying?

Hippymama · 15/04/2013 19:18

Maybe the lady who did the "demonstration" had been asked questions about cloth nappies by some of the other mams? I know when I first started using cloth, my family thought I was nuts. Mention cloth nappies to them and all they could think of was the old fashioned terry nappies that you boiled in a big pan on the stove! Things have changed an awful lot since then :)

Like I said before, using cloth is a decision I made because I felt it was best for my baby and me. I think it would be great if more people use cloth nappies, but at the same time, it is up to them what they use.

GoingVerySlowlyMad · 15/04/2013 19:21

YABU I used to use cloth for both of mine and I used to DREAD changing them in public changing rooms! Without fail I used to get sneery comments along the the lines of "you must have too much time on your hands to be bothering with that". I don't live in an area where there are any support groups or cash incentive schemes for cloth nappies so most parents round here won't have come across them.

I didn't advertise the fact I used cloth, I was happy with the choice I made for my children and respect that we are all different. I just felt it was such a shame that I didn't get that respect back and people felt it was their god given right to make negative comments.

Exhaustipated · 15/04/2013 19:21

I am interested to know if what
Iteotwawki said is true- that they aren't really better for the environment. Anyone got a link to research etc?

Overall, I would say YANBU about the people you know OP (it's a bit much to shove it in everyone's face all the time, I would never do that with BF, for example).

But YABU to generalise. Those I know who use cloth nappies really aren't superior/smug at all. They have been encouraging when I've expressed an interest, but haven't judged when I've said it's not for me, at least for now.

Original poster
DearJohnLoveSavannah · 15/04/2013 19:21

Maybe the lady who did the "demonstration" had been asked questions about cloth nappies by some of the other mams?

I'd say there was 9 of us, only 3 of us are mothers. And one of the mothers her child doesn't even need them anymore.

OP posts:
moonstorm · 15/04/2013 19:21

dashoflime has it in one. And that point could be said about so many areas in manufacturing. In fact if manufactures were made to cut down much more, then we, at the consumer end, wouldn't have to pick up their pieces...

Squarepebbles · 15/04/2013 19:22

With energy costing more and more in money and effects on the environment, the shite in detergents unless you use Ecover which costs £££££££,the impact of having wet cloth hanging around the house(mould pores and asthma)or worse tumble drying,the cost of creams,nappy soak etc,etc.

Sorry anybody could see there must be buggar all in it.

I don't think they look cute either,quite the reverse.

I used Eco disposables as a compromise.

pinkpudding · 15/04/2013 19:23

I'm with the op. I know quite a few mums using cloth. I use washies myself when in the house and use eco disposables when out and about or holidays. But I really really dislike hearing other mums going on about dispicables like they think a nappy could possibly be evil. Some get really evangelical. I know one woman who's goal in life is for her child to never ever wear a disposable nappy, used cloth from birth. I think she really needs to chill out and find a much more interesting subject to obcess about about.

Squarepebbles · 15/04/2013 19:23

And yes I did try them but it didn't save me anything.

Exhaustipated · 15/04/2013 19:25

Sorry x post - I see that study has been disproven

evansthebread · 15/04/2013 19:26

Just wondering, but has anyone tried fleece or bamboo nappies? If so, I would imagine they would be so much easier to wash and dry (and costing a lot less to do so).

Also, is there VAT on disposables? If there is, little wonder there'd be no campaign.

Hippymama · 15/04/2013 19:26

I wash mine at 40 with a mixture of own brand non bio and soda crystals, no fabric conditioner and dry on the line outside. I do one nappy wash about every three days. Definitely costs me less than disposables.

Hippymama · 15/04/2013 19:27

Evans, I use fleece liners and have a couple of fleece wraps. They are fab and come out of the washer practically dry :)

MummytoMog · 15/04/2013 19:28

That study has been disproven. And what creams, nappy soak or hanging round the house? Anyway, I never talk about them because some sposie users can be really horrid about cloth nappies and you never know which ones are going to tell you your baby smells of pee (not true) and looks stupid with their big cloth bum (maybe, but I like it).

HiggsBoson · 15/04/2013 19:30

Squarepebbles Two part nappies dry very quickly, so the don't hang around the house for days on end.

Secondly cloth users don't soak nappies these days. You just chuck them in a bucket and put the lid on.

No additional cost in terms of creams etc., as less nappy rash in the absence of the chemicals which disposables contain.

Some serious misinformation out there.