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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why this Mother was eye rolling over my comments to my DC.

128 replies

Goldenbear · 12/04/2013 14:17

I was at a supermarket this morning and was trying to choose some yogurts for my DC. DS picks up some that are laden with sugar. So I said, 'no not those they have too much sugar in them, what about these instead?'. Cue lots of eye rolling from a new Mother nearby. She picked up something more sugary for herself so I don't think she was in agreement with me. I'd seen her from the start pushing her newborn baby in a supermarket car seat style trolley, the baby was wailing and wailing and couldn't have been older than 2 weeks. When i first saw the newborn crying and crying i felt sorry for the baby but then remembered how difficult those first weeks were and so stopped judging. However, after the yoghurt judgment I did feel that she was hardly in a position to judge my 'preciousness', considering her very young baby was wailing the whole way around the shop and she wouldn't pick it up. I heard her say things to the 2 week old intermittently like, 'you're not having a good day today are you?'

I knew she was a new Mum because there was a nappy promotion on in the store and I heard her tell the shop assistant that the baby girl was her first.

AIBU in thinking you keep the eye rolling to yourself given the circumstances?

OP posts:
mrsscoob · 12/04/2013 14:19

She was probably having a bad day and probably picked up on your judginess hence the rolling eyes. It does sound like you were looking at her rather a lot!

Pancakeflipper · 12/04/2013 14:34

She probably hasn't slept for more than 2 hrs in the last few weeks ( if lucky).

She might be looking at her baby and thinking " which way up in this trolley seat contraption should you go?"

First baby is bewildering to many mums.

Don't judge her.

She might end up feeding her child yoghurts that are more sugary than you but she will do other parenting stuff just fine and dandy.

DiscoDonkey · 12/04/2013 14:37

Ah well she judged, you judged. Even Stevens I say

MintyyAeroEgg · 12/04/2013 14:39

Seriously?

ChocsAwayInMyGob · 12/04/2013 14:41

A knackered first time mother with a newborn gave you an eye roll.

Could have been worse. Move on.

BegoniaBampot · 12/04/2013 14:42

so were your yogurts laden with artificial sweeteners instead of sugar then or more natural yogurt type?

IYoniWantToBeWithYou · 12/04/2013 14:42

She probably wasn't even looking or listening to you at all and eye rolling at having to do a shop with a crying baby and, by the sounds of it, having someone watch her every move.

I really never pay a blind bit of notice to anyone in the supermarket unless they are in my way or I'm in theirs, let alone listen to what they say to their baby, shop assistants, watch what nappies and yoghurts they are buying etc. Were you bored? Confused

MrsTerryPratchett · 12/04/2013 14:44

It could have been an 'oh, look at me with the noisy baby' eye roll at herself. I used to do those a lot when people stared at crying DD.

YoniLovesChachi · 12/04/2013 14:48

This really made me laugh. You certainly put a lot of effort into not judging this woman, just happening to notice her rolling her eyes a lot and accidentally overhearing her talking about her nappies.

She probably noticed you paying her an unusual amount of attention and was annoyed when you couldn't just choose a yogurt and get out of the way.

Lj8893 · 12/04/2013 14:48

It could have been an eye roll to herself that she didn't think about the sugar in yogurts. As a new mum she's probably discovering all sorts of things that she hadnt thought about before and probably chastising herself!

YoniGirlInTheWorld · 12/04/2013 14:51

She was probably eye rolling over your yoghurt sermon and was thankful she wasn't there for your butter vs olive spread one.

SilveryMoon · 12/04/2013 14:52

Someone gave me an odd look the other day in the supermarket when I told ds1 that I wasn't going to buy the 'no added sugar' squash he had chosen. i was going to buy this one , he asks why so I attempt to explain the sugar vs aspartame business.

Who cares what someone in the supermarket thinks of your choices? If she read this thread, she'd probably say that she really doesn't give a fuck what yogurts you feed your dc's.

I also remember being in the supermarket with ds1 when he was a few weeks old. He was in the car seat on one of those trolleys with the holder bit. He was wailing all around the shop. I got down the frozen foods section and heard one woman mumble to another "she really shouldn't bring that baby out when it's in such a state"
I literally hadn't slept for weeks. Did she really think I wanted to be in the supermarket with a screaming baby? I (Blush) yelled back "I've got to eat, so at some point have to come here" I probably dropped the f-bomb as well.

Don't worry about it, sure she hasn't given you a second thought.

EverSoYoni · 12/04/2013 14:53

OP, were you doing "loud parenting"? It makes me feel like eye rolling, not the content of the parenting, just the way its delivered.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/04/2013 14:54

You seem to have taken a massive interest in her!!

She could probably feel the judginess oozing from your pores.

SauvignonBlanche · 12/04/2013 14:55
Biscuit
YoniGirlInTheWorld · 12/04/2013 14:59

Yeah loud parenting is the worst. I saw a woman with a baby of around 10 months (who was happily chewing his own fist) trying to get him to point out which apples he wanted. When he looked vaguely in the direction of the pink ladies she scolded him for having expensive tastes and chucked some bog standard funsize 99p efforts in the trolley.

usualsuspect · 12/04/2013 14:59

Maybe she was a bit fed up Of your bizarre stalkerish behaviour

MorrisZapp · 12/04/2013 14:59

I loud parent all the time. I'm a parent, it's loud. Couldn't give a hoot what other people think.

Loud parenting on MN is just shorthand for being middle class. So shoot me for engaging with my child.

Bearcrumble · 12/04/2013 15:02

You got the Rachel's didn't you?

seeker · 12/04/2013 15:02

My favourite loud parenting overhearing was "Well, Toby, that's the shopping done.. Shall we buy some rice cakes for the treat jar?"

Waitrose, obvs.

5318008 · 12/04/2013 15:03

oh that is BRILLIANT Seeker

lolo

Pancakeflipper · 12/04/2013 15:04

snorts at Bearcrumble. Grin

Bearcrumble · 12/04/2013 15:04

Put down the papaya Felix.

DiscoDonkey · 12/04/2013 15:06

Rice cakes are rank, when that woman is in a care home I hope Toby brings her nothing but Shitty rice cakes every visit.

PickledInAPearTree · 12/04/2013 15:09

Some babies cry all the time what you supposed to do starve?

This is another reminder of why I Internet shop.

You run the fricking gauntlet at tescos these days what with eye rolling and people threatening to knock you out.