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AIBU?

AIBU to throttle DD???!!

466 replies

matchpoint · 31/03/2013 21:41

Roughly four hours later and I am still frothing at the mouth.

Backstory: DD is 4 years old, and she and her sister have received (too) many Easter eggs from school, family friends, various well-meaning relatives etc. Both had a Creme egg for a treat after dinner, and the rest of their haul of Easter eggs are living in the kitchen to be dished out as appropriate over the next year/eaten by me (seriously, there are a lot).

I come downstairs to get DD up for bathtime, and she has opened and eaten parts of five eggs, two of which she knew were not hers. There was chocolate in little bits all over the floor, some of which melted and it took ages to clean up.

When asked about it, DD lied to my face that it wasn't her, but eventually fessed up (her sister is innocent in this affair). I went absolutely batshit crazy at her, and I don't feel guilty. She was sneaky, greedy and she lied to my face. She knows better. DD was sent straight to bed, no bath, no story, cried for ages, now asleep.

I'm thinking that she gets no more Easter eggs; and also want to ban her from the iPad for the next week. DH is a bit of a softy, and reckons being shouted at and sent to bed was punishment enough.

DH thinks this is too harsh; my worry is that she will see it as a not a bad trade-off---snuck into Easter eggs, Mummy shouted a bit, but she still got chocolate. MN thoughts please??

OP posts:

Report

MajaBiene · 31/03/2013 22:50

Take a deep breath and remind yourself she is four!

However angry you were (about chocolate eggs ffs!) not sure how you can have left her to cry herself to sleep

marriedinwhiteagain · 31/03/2013 22:50

Shall we all really hope that the OP read the first dozen messages and is now snuggled up with her dd, snuffling into her hair and reassuring her how much she loves her.

We all make mistakes as parents remembers screaming at ds when he lied about sweets at about five or six and yelling at dd when with a friend she indelibly markered all over a dolls house and bedroom wall when she was five. Two occasions when I went batshit but at nearly 15 and 18 they seem to have turned out OK.

Bridgetbidet · 31/03/2013 22:51

And how can she be told off for taking eggs which 'aren't hers' when you're going to do exactly the same thing OP, taking her eggs and eating them yourself?

AgentZigzag · 31/03/2013 22:52

I know why you might say that fluffy, but I don't want the OP to think she's a Bad Mummy just because she lost it a bit.

Fucking hell, I'm overly pretty controlled, and even I've behaved in ways I know weren't up to scratch in the parenting manual.

Same as if you fall off the wagon drinking alcohol/dieting/spending less cash, just dust yourself down and try again tomorrow - as well as looking at what was it about the situation that made you so angry.

littlebitofthislittlebitofthat · 31/03/2013 22:52

really... they were her eggs. they were given to her.

LemonPeculiarJones · 31/03/2013 22:54

It is your behaviour that is the issue here.

MintChocCh1p · 31/03/2013 22:56

You sound horrible

It's no biggie is it? 4 years old? Blimey.

Lucyellensmum95 · 31/03/2013 22:56

You sent your child to bed and let herself cry herself to sleep

marriedinwhiteagain · 31/03/2013 22:57

DS: now mum before you go batshit
Me: Are you saying I go batshit
DS: Well yeh but it's funny
Me: FFS
DS: But you know that if we'd talked about me using your credit card it would have taken ages and then you would have given in so I saved you the time and trouble of arguing with me.

It's eggs OP. Eggs. Deal with it because it gets much much worse and mine are good teenagers in the scheme of things.

matchpoint · 31/03/2013 22:57

...always nice to come back and see you've been mauled! Hazards of posting in AIBU, I suppose.

Yes, they had one creme egg today. I am very strict with both my DDs sugar intake, as they have inherited their father's shit teeth. Maybe this is "mean and stingy", but I want to reduce the risk of decay as much as I can.

NumericalMum-no I have not considered counselling. Thanks for your concern.

MrsSham-I know other DD is innocent as she was upstairs the entire time. She can't be in two places at once.

Dontsteponthemomeraths-I love how you think I scapegoat one child and the other is the golden one. Can you tell me how you reached that stunning conclusion from one post?

OP posts:

MintChocCh1p · 31/03/2013 22:58

I've had a look at your other posts.

You have form for being harsh, over bearing and controlling from what I can make out.

You deserved your mauling i think.

AgentZigzag · 31/03/2013 22:59

Awww, can't you take anything posters have said on board matchpoint?

Can you at least acknowledge you might have been a bit harsh with the little lass?

marriedinwhiteagain · 31/03/2013 22:59

Have you forgiven her though OP?

fluffypillow · 31/03/2013 22:59

agentzigzag I just read my post back, and thought I shouldn't have written that. You are right. I got a bit too emotional about it

I just hated the tone of the OP, and felt sad for the little girl I don't like to think of any child going to bed so upset and worried.

MajaBiene · 31/03/2013 23:00

If you weren't going to let her have her Easter eggs, you should have got rid of them completely or put them well out of sight/reach.

Taking all her Easter eggs off her and leaving them within reach but forbidding her to have them is too much for a little child.

piprabbit · 31/03/2013 23:01

Are you still frothing?

You don't appear to have any regrets about your behaviour, although perhaps you just aren't admitting them to us.

NorksAreMessy · 31/03/2013 23:01

Ah, it is one of those!

OP: AIBU?
THE WHOLE OF MN : YABU
OP: no I'm not

[buconfused]

Lucyellensmum95 · 31/03/2013 23:01

your last post there is very defensive - look, just admit, you fucked up, give the poor wee soul a cuddle and a bloody easter egg for breakfast

If you are that worried about her teeth, just get her to clean them afterwards - sorted.

scottishtablet · 31/03/2013 23:02

'Innocent'? Seriously? She took a little chocolate. Poor child.

LemonPeculiarJones · 31/03/2013 23:02

OP you cannot absorb what everyone is saying, it seems. Can you imagine for a minute that perhaps you were wrong, or went a bit too far? Or does suspending the idea that you are In The Right feel impossible, even for a moment?

It might be useful to open your mind here, rather than go on the attack against particular posters.

marriedinwhiteagain · 31/03/2013 23:02

Tootles off to make DS a cuppa with two buttered matzos and DD a Hot choc before going to bed [bugrin]. They've hardly touched their eggs today. Mummy mug me [buwink]. But I still luffs them - ds is busy visiting another world - something to do with the computer.

MrsSham · 31/03/2013 23:02

And do you think OP you can take any of the positive, supportive or me constructive suggestions? maybe difficult in such a harsh thread but I do think you have maybe picked just a few of the easier to justify comments.

I was rather hoping you would come back with an honest explanation and realisation about your reaction, I do hope you can find the support and honesty with your self that you need to re look at your base reactions and behaviour. But sadly not.

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AllThatGlistens · 31/03/2013 23:02

AIBU?

Yes.

No I'm not!

Look, we've all overreacted at times, and it's easy to get defensive when you're criticised but honestly, she's just 4 yrs old, your anger and reaction is disproportionate to what she did, she's still so very little

marriedinwhiteagain · 31/03/2013 23:03

Leave the OP to it. She'll be someone's MIL one day.

MrsSham · 31/03/2013 23:04

More not me constructive

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