When I said earlier the figures don't stack up, I meant specific examples have been given of when two people earning and paying less in tax than one higher earner. I know the economy is important, but I honestly think it is a red herring in this debate. People don't go out to work 'for the economy', they work either to primarily raise money for their family, or for fulfilment or a mixture of both. sahp are making a conscious decision to earn less and as a family spend less (I.e buy less goods) so they are not going to be popular with the government. My dh drives a clapped out old car, for example, other dhs from homes where both parents work more conventionally, might drive an Audi (for example). Just one example of how we would rather spend less to be able to spend more time with the children.
I never sahp should be paid to do so. I explained that the discrimination sahp experience can be financial (unfairly shouldering higher proportion of cuts in benefits etc) and otherwise e.g people think you are lazy, not contributing etc.
We do, as explained, share childcare between us, so am not strictly a sahp, but I am we'll aware of the discrimination sahps experience. It is truly horrible that the contribution of raising children is not valued. People value going out to work and paying for daycare. The research about daycare states that in terms of attachment, the preferred model for under 3s is care provided by a parent, or perhaps a relative if a parent is not available. The outcomes for people who use childcare for under 3s are perfectly ok in most cases (although if children use daycare for extremely long hours or start v young there are possible negatives) but some parents make an active decision to do what is preferred particularly when the children are young. If you want to read such research genuinely (as I did when researching who should look after my own dc) try googling Jay Belsky as a starting point.
I strongly believe if flexible working initiatives were adopting particularly by larger companies (understand small businesses might not be able to) there would be less discrimination as sahp could organise to work around school pick ups, school holidays etc etc. I speak from experience as dh and I do this. I am endlessly amazed by people who think it is somehow 'not contributing' to take this approach.
Perhaps one day dh and I will look back and wish I had earned more during the children's early years but I don't think so. I am not 'demonising' paid childcare - I can well understand the financial pressures to work and see my friends carefully choosing and paying for the best childcare they can afford. Their dcs are perfectly fine, I understand this. We'd rather exist on half the amount of money, drive an old car, wear second hand clothes, not go out, not eat out, not go on holiday etc, so that we can provide our own childcare. Its not because we can 'afford it', it is a choice we make on how to spend our income, for this brief time in the children's lives. I do not mean to belittle other people's choices, I can see that we are all trying to do the best for our families. Just different views on how to do it.