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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

AIBU when meeting new people, to judge them by the way they speak

110 replies

PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 20:51

When meeting new people, I tend to listen to the way in which they speak, and then make a judgement- however the judgement shows with a snobbish face which I unfortunately inherited from my mother.

This is the latest scenario:

I have recently been skiing with my DH and DC along with friends who we regularly travel with. My friend this year introduced us to her new partner, whom I instantly disliked! Firstly, upon meeting the chap he called me 'babe' 'sweet haart' (pronounced as spelt) and speaking like a cockney, I felt like I was on an eastenders set! Personally it triggered all kinds of snobbish reactions for example when he asked me 'do ya wanna drink' I sharply replied 'NO THANK YOU'. In addition he repeatedly arranged his .... and sat with his legs so far apart that when I was made to sit next to him I found my self crossing my legs so tightly that my nose and lips looked like old raisons; obvious I was disgusted.

My friend confronted me about the issue- and I told her I thought he was not good enough for her, bearing in mind DF is a solicitor and is very elegant. It did not go down very well at all- and now we're not speaking.

DH told me that it's becoming an issue, since whenever I meet new people who I dislike my Mother Snob comes out! It's so embarrassing but I cannot seem to stop!!

Am I being an unreasonable snob or am I being fair?

Advice??

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 27/02/2013 20:52

Woteva.

IneedAgoldenNickname · 27/02/2013 20:52

You're an unreasonable snob

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 27/02/2013 20:53
Biscuit
Foggles · 27/02/2013 20:53

Margot???

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 27/02/2013 20:54

Are you for real, you are being completely unreasonable. Do you have any friends left?

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 27/02/2013 20:55

Hyacinth? Is it you?

LaurieFairyCake · 27/02/2013 20:57

Yes you are and I think it's great that you want to change that about yourself.

The first step is noticing it. Now you have to apologise to your friend for your abominable rudeness.

And then you do some voluntary work with a section if society that's underprivileged.

Once you've done that (because obviously you're serious about changing this) come back and tell us how you're getting on.

I wholeheartedly applaud you for trying to become less of a total cunt.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 27/02/2013 20:57

YABU and an unreasonable snob, but it's a promising start that you're rightfully embarrassed by your own behaviour.

That said, if you were genuinely as intellectual and well-spoken as you claim, you would know that it should be "friends with whom we regularly travel". Wink

BegoniaBampot · 27/02/2013 20:57

Tsk, tsk, so unsubtle - try harder next time.

gordyslovesheep · 27/02/2013 20:58

'knell

usualsuspect · 27/02/2013 20:59

The Trolls are rubbish just lately.

PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 20:59

I know it's terrible I cringe at the fact that I do it! But like Lauriefairycake says I've noticed it! I do have friends left but I think it's something to do with my upbringing!

Yes someone mentioned voluntary work!

Okay thank you Lauriefairycake, I blame my Mother, and my upbringing and background- but things already seem to be getting better fingers crossed

OP posts:
fuzzysnout · 27/02/2013 21:00

I fink you iz jus wel jel.

Icelollycraving · 27/02/2013 21:01

Disappointing.

Thingiebob · 27/02/2013 21:01

This must be a joke. If not, your attitude is vile.

PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 21:01

Of who?

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 27/02/2013 21:01

She is totes wel jel, innit blud.

LaurieFairyCake · 27/02/2013 21:02

You still must apologise to your friend, you can't fall out over this - you owe her flowers and sincerity.

Foggles · 27/02/2013 21:03

Only elegant flowers, mind.

usualsuspect · 27/02/2013 21:03

Not some nasty cheap daffodils.

Locketjuice · 27/02/2013 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 21:04

Agreed- we're meeting tomorrow for a bite to eat at lunchtime- never thought of flowers thanks :D

OP posts:
PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 21:06

Locketjuice- what makes me a dick lol- the fact I enjoy good company.... :S

OP posts:
Foggles · 27/02/2013 21:07

You just lolled ! Shock

PennyBrowne · 27/02/2013 21:07

shit happens

OP posts: