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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To get annoyed at DH for buying me flowers

151 replies

BimbaBirba · 13/02/2013 21:04

For Valentine's... Yes one day early!
Annoyed because he dumps them on me and I need to unwrap them, get a vase, dispose of all the wrapping, cut the stems and place them
in water then clear up the mess from leaves and other bits that fall on the floor.
What a faff! I just wish he'd buy me chocolates instead!

OP posts:
BimbaBirba · 14/02/2013 06:56

I must have started a thread similar to a bogus one by your comments. I'm sorry if people think this was a fan thread. It wasn't. That's the trouble with bogus thread: people don't believe anything anymore.
Might try to upload a picture of the bloody flowers on my profile to prove Im not a fake

OP posts:
KnittedCharacter · 14/02/2013 07:21

My dp always buys me flowers which come already in a bag of water presented in a box so all i have to do is find a nice place for them to stand!! He is a good un....!

pigletmania · 14/02/2013 07:32

Here have a Biscuit very ungrateful

BambieO · 14/02/2013 07:36

piglet I'm reckoning you will be flamed for not providing the saucer for crumbs and the Brew for dunking and a Hoover for strays Grin

MrsBucketxx · 14/02/2013 07:39

stealth boast

have a Biscuit I get bugger all.

BambieO · 14/02/2013 07:47

There's a lot of biscuits here and no saucers, this is a recipe for disaster!! OP will be most unimpressed :) !

MrsBucketxx · 14/02/2013 07:50

but you dont have a mug and saucer, or is that wrong too?

GreenLeafTea · 14/02/2013 07:57

Two years ago dh and I were really broke so agreed not to get each other presents. My dh ended up buying me some plants in a Christmas display. I was really annoyed as I could have really used something more practical with the money such as shoes, there was nowhere to put the bloody things and I was just so stressed out and busy as we were moving in the new year. It was really the last thing I needed at that moment, more things to look after!

I get the OP's feelings. It's the thoughtlessness of the gift that was the problem. Like buying someone on a diet chocolates.

BambieO · 14/02/2013 07:58

Haha I have no idea mrsb

I'm one of those weird creatures that doesn't drink hot drinks

Blush
ScumbagCollegeDropout · 14/02/2013 08:15

I'm kinda with you OP.

I am crap with flowers. Sure they can be nice to look at but they don't do anything. Just sit there getting all droopy and dry until I can be arsed to throw them away two months later.

I don't see the point in them.

Chocolate on the other hand...

Mosman · 14/02/2013 08:21

I had to buy my own so the children wouldn't cotton to the fact that I want to stab him the head for fucking some tart.

Take the roses and thank god you aren't me today.

thegreylady · 14/02/2013 08:24

My dh and I just exchange cards and a kiss in bed on Valentines Day then I get breakfast in bed :-) . Much nicer than flowers.

AllYoursBabooshka · 14/02/2013 08:25

Oh Mosman :(

Now that's a bastard, hope you're alright.

YABU Bimba. Tell him you don't like flowers.

SnowyWellies · 14/02/2013 08:32

Oh Mosman. :(

OP if you are real, then really I am pretty shocked by your ungratefulness. It is a nice gesture, your DH loves you. These are all good things in a world that is too often filled with pain and difficult times. (seriously). Are you the sort of person who rolls their eyes at wonky mother's day cards from children too? Don't be that person.

My FIL gets really pissed off if anyone buys him presents.... the last time he did was a few Christmases ago when he really went off on one. So now we do not do presents at Christmas.... DH and I and the Dcs secrete ourselves away in our room Christmas morning and open them privately. It is a real shame, that someone ruins it like that. Don't ruin your husband's pleasure at getting you something nice.

CuriousMama · 14/02/2013 08:34

Mosman so sorry to hear that. What are you planning to do or is it too soon to think straight?

CuriousMama · 14/02/2013 08:36

SnowyW why do you have Christmas with your FIL? Sounds pretty grim.

rockinastocking · 14/02/2013 08:39

I get it, OP.
I started feeling like this about the same time I went off my stbx-husband.

DP doesn't 'do' Valentine's Day. I mind a tiny bit, because I've been conditioned to. But he does romantic things at random times throughout the year when I least expect it, which is much nicer.

He wrote me a song on Sunday Smile

SnowyWellies · 14/02/2013 08:51

Because it is all meant to be a family Christmas Curious. :) Actually, generally Christmas is a nice time, just that bit always seems a shame.

Although- when I wrote that upthread I thought to myself WHY do we pander to him like that? Okay, so he hates presents.... this year I might say 'Right kids, present opening time' and just do it in the lounge room. (Although DH and I might do ours privately).

My DH did not give me flowers, but I received three cards in his fairly obvious writing pretending to be fron a 'secret admirer' so I have told him he needs to up his game as clearly I have options Grin

CuriousMama · 14/02/2013 09:01

Please do SnowyW, you'll think back when the dcs are grown and really regret pandering if not. Why should you do this, it's crazy?

SnowyWellies · 14/02/2013 09:09

We do tend to tip toe around him a bit anyway as he can be quite difficult (although I do genuinely love him) but you are right, Curious.

Sorry for hijack OP!

CuriousMama · 14/02/2013 09:15

My late exFIL didn't do gifts or cards but he would never have been like this. He accepted them from us but wouldn't have ever bought any. ExMIl more than made up for him and still does. Love them both.

I'd tell him beforehand that it's not fair on the dcs so it'll save any fuss on the day. I find it very odd tbh that the allows this with dcs in the house? Even if it's for religious reasons you have to embrace all beliefs. Seems a bit passive aggressive?

Stropzilla · 14/02/2013 09:17

Mine doesn't make an effort the rest of the year why should today be any different? I only get flowers after an argument and thatss really not the reason I want flowers!

Lucky you!

Notafoodbabyanymore · 14/02/2013 09:22

Just been reading a thread about a woman whose DH takes all her wages, verbally abuses her and kicks her. Sad

YABU

discotequewreck · 14/02/2013 09:40

Ilovesooty, that made me laugh I.e. the woman who berated her dh for the flowers that didn't compliment the living room.

I can always rely on mn to cheer me up Smile

landrover · 14/02/2013 10:01

The cakes thread was SUCH fun!!!!! I totally agree with Bimba!!!!!! I tell my husband every year (nicely) that I would rather have a silk flower arrangement that I can keep forever!
He is getting it right now! (card and champagne and bar of chocolate) But I think Bimba is right!!!

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