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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

for flouting hospital 'no sibling' rule for ebf baby?

659 replies

StarlightMcKenzie · 05/02/2013 14:57

DS had an operation yesterday. He needed me to be there. Breastfed baby also needed me.

I took my Aunt to look after my ds and we were sent initially to a waiting room. The plan was for her to keep him there and for me to pop out of the ward to feed him.

However, we were there for half an hour and my ds started to ask for a feed, so I started to bf. Literally 2 sucks in, we were called. I pulled him off and he screamed so I jigged him about (which quietens him as a distraction) and moved towards the ward with him in tow.

The nurse told me he wasn't allowed. I told her that I needed to finish his feed and then I would take him back to my aunt. I offered to vrubg ds ub 10 mins but she got arsey saying that ds would have to have his operation cancelled if he missed his slpt. Nurse started tutting about him disturbing the other patients and that there was a strict no-sibling rule that I knew about as it was in the letter (it was).

so WIBU?

OP posts:
11Plustrauma · 06/02/2013 20:45

I am old. And hard of thinking. Anyone care to explain to me what's going on on this thread? Because I've read it twice and I still don't get it.

Uppermid · 06/02/2013 20:46

Well I must have read this thread very differently then.

She said that the sibling rule was about space not infection, several people ignored this and went on about how selfish she was and she could have made all the other children ill

She also said several times that she had not complained about the nurse, in fact they ended up getting on

She had plans in place but these fell through and ended up having to feed the baby for a short time on the ward

She explained that other threads where she talked about weaned babies were other children, not this baby.

I'm not sure what exactly she's done in the last to deserve this treatment but it seemed to me to be very harsh and unnecessary. People checking old posts etc - wtf is that all about?

I've seen other people post about their bf baby and how when the ex / mil / dm / whoever wants to have the baby for any length of time, they are supported and told that they shouldn't be separated from the baby as they are bf, why is this any different?

Yes leaving a baby for a short while when they're hungry is not going to kill them, but the baby had already started to feed, it's highly unlikely that anything would have soothed that baby other than its mum feeding it, is that so difficult to understand.

Maybe this is a poster who has had difficulties in the past with healthcare organisations but that doesn't mean she was looking for trouble but several posters admitted that they judged what had happened purely on her name. Not on.

No wonder she's had her posts deleted. How do you know she's not had a really shit time of it for whatever reason, she's come on here looking for support and gets nothing but grief. If you had a problem with her, report her, don't start a witch hunt.

BeerTricksPotter · 06/02/2013 20:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsDeVere · 06/02/2013 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

crashdoll · 06/02/2013 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

idshagphilspencer · 06/02/2013 20:59

Thinking about Helenmumsnet getting fruity with David Cmaeron has really made me Grin

FrankWippery · 06/02/2013 21:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

TheSecondComing · 06/02/2013 21:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nipersvest · 06/02/2013 21:17

uppermid - "She explained that other threads where she talked about weaned babies were other children, not this baby"

really?, are you sure about that?? because that explanation sounded like a big load of bollocks to me!

point is, the op bent the truth about a lot of things, meaning many on this thread take the whole scenario with a pinch of salt.

Dereksmalls · 06/02/2013 21:28

You had my sympathy until the "bring DS up in 10 minutes" bit, then sorry but you lost it and I can't understand why anyone thinks that suggestion is ok.

idshagphilspencer · 06/02/2013 21:29

I reckon helenmumsnet really is busy.......

BigSilky · 06/02/2013 21:43

There's a cracking thread about the OP wanting to breastfeed in a public pool now you mention it.

WipsGlitter · 06/02/2013 21:56

Link please!

MarthasHarbour · 06/02/2013 22:01

now i am Confused as i can see all of OP's previous posts, including all the Ella's kitchen gubbins.

cant believe this thread is still going. OP your baby isnt EBF,

So was this another 7 month old baby masquerading as your baby? or your baby from several years ago....?

StarlightMcKenzie Mon 28-Jan-13 20:45:23
7 month old

Lots of breastfeeding.

Large piece of yellow pepper (not sure how much was eaten)
Ellas kitchen pouch
Banana
spagetti bolognese (not sure how much was eaten either, baby played with it mainly and spread it around high chair - what a mess)
yoghurt (spread around high chair and mixed in with bolognese)

orangepink · 06/02/2013 22:02

Am rarely moved to post but I think the OP was not BU and I can't understand why there's been so many unpleasant posts directed at the op.

MarthasHarbour · 06/02/2013 22:03

your Aunt could have pacified him with a banana and a yoghurt Hmm

sorry but we have caught you bang to rights here

MarthasHarbour · 06/02/2013 22:05

uh oh - deletions have started

MummyDuckAndDuckling · 06/02/2013 22:06

Oh i remember the thread about the op wanting to feed her dc at side of pool. Was it the same person?!

exoticfruits · 06/02/2013 22:12

I have looked at the other thread and it is quite clear that the elder child could have been put first and the aunt could have been given some easily transported food and a drink.

WipsGlitter · 06/02/2013 22:16

That's a lot of deleting!!

MmeLindor · 06/02/2013 22:18

Um. MNHQ - Would it not be better to just delete the whole thread?

May I suggest as a deletion message.

Thread deleted because we spilt one of those fruity pouch things on it. Whoops.

HelenMumsnet · 06/02/2013 22:19

Evening all.

Right, big fat ahem at this thread.

Please can we remind you about our Talk Guidelines, specifically the ones about no personal attacks and no trollhunting (ie suggesting another poster might not be genuine).

A couple of clarifications, too...

The OP's posts were all withdrawn by MNHQ, at the OP's request, several months ago. The OP told us people at the Department for Work and Pensions, who were looking into an allegation that her ds wasn't disabled, were reading her posts and quoting them back. We thought, in the light of that, that her request was perfectly reasonable.

We can see that some of you have searched the OP's history and brought up some of her more recent posts on this thread.

That's fine (although perhaps not particularly friendly Smile) but we do need to remind you that doing so specifically in order to make personal attacks or trollhunt is not on.

So, if I was to post about how much I loved David Cameron (using him as an example, for no particular reason at all) and folks were to pull up on a search remember me saying a couple of days ago how much I loathed his guts, it would be fine to post, "Hang on, didn't you say you loathed his guts two days ago, HelenMumsnet?"

It would NOT be OK to post, "HelenMumsnet, you fucking troll. This link here and here and here show you to be the biggest liar of all time."

Equally, if I had posted in 1993 about loathing David Cameron, it would not be on to use that a evidence of my lying/trolling today. People are allowed to change their opinions at least once a decade, after all.

Hope that helps.

For what it's worth, Starlight has been on MN for ages and we've never had reason to doubt her as a genuine poster. We'll drop her a line about the dangers of changing genders/ages/details in posts - and how that can often lead to problems when others notice and assume an intent to deceive.

Right, as you were. Can't keep Big Dave waiting...

5madthings · 06/02/2013 22:22

Except bfeeding isnt just about nutrition! the baby had just woken and went back to sleep after the feed so it was about comfort as well as nutrition. At 7mths even a baby on solids will STILL and should be getting most of its nutrition from bmilk. And it will be a huge source of comfort.

sauvignon who is a ward manager has posted and said she in NBU.

I have been in similar situation a few times and they have akways allowed 'babes in arms' and bfed babies.

AudrinaAdare · 06/02/2013 22:24

That is the best H.Q response I have ever read.

Although it has made me feel queasy.

LadyBeagleEyes · 06/02/2013 22:25

Op was the breastfeeding at the pool one?
I remember that,
I'd also like to know wtf is going on, please MNHQ, can you come on and explain.