It's up to mums to teach their boys that pubic hair on women is normal!?

[Uppatreecuppatea]

I've read countless surveys and reports over the last few months that state that young men would be 'grossed out' if they went to bed with a woman and found that she had pubic hair.

They seem to think that all women either come hair free or should wax it all off.

I think a lot of this attitude comes down to them viewing porn where it's normal for a woman to have zero pubic hair and a neat little pudenda.

It's a worry. I quizzed the local boys who work in our pub and they all wax their chest and think pubic hair is disgusting on both men and women.

So glad I am married to a man who appreciates the 70's!

But what is in store for our young girls?

It's not new.I have heard that in olden times young men got their expectations of the female form from statues and were rather shocked to discover real girls went as smooth everywhere!

Mosy young lads are happy to shag any girl, hairy or not!

Did any normally hirsuit women here do 'Fanuary', like the boy's version 'Movember'?

I can not see that this is possible. Why would a young man or woman listen to them mum, when a generation has been like this for ages, all thier friends are, all the porn is, all the footballers and pop groups are like it.
I don't like it. I don't think its right. But what can we do?
I am more concerned about teenagers view of sex (which is of course linked to this), because of porn and all they see, as the norm, is a hard unemotional fuck.They seem to think that that is 'making love'.

Fortunatley dh and I sleep naked, and we shower infront of the boys, so our 2 know that WE have pubic hair. The world may not, but our 2 know that we do.

I don't understand why this is only a question for mums. What about dads?

Plus there's all kinds of everything that's normal - from hairy to nothing and everything in between. Why shouldn't a woman do whatever she feels happiest with?

I think its pretty disgusting that you feel it OK to ask personal questions of people whose job it is to be nice to you. I bet they resent serving you in the pub.

would you go round tescos and ask teenage girls on the deli counter their opinions on anal sex?

My theory is that, as mothers, we are supposed to sport pubic hair so that our boys know that there's nothing wrong with it, 11plus.

One thing occurs to me - are some people assuming that boys are really dim, and despite having pubic hair of their own, will still be surprised that other human beings have it?

Pro muff V pubist

when boys start refusing sex because the female has pubic hair, then I'll think we have something worth worrying about.

actually I won't - because this will breed out those who think pubic hair is abnormal, so the problem will solve itself.

Ok so when your son gets to be nearly sexually active, you say "over 'ere son and look at my hairy muff" ???

FFS that's ridiculous. The best thing to do is teach your children (sons and daughters) that there are lots of different looks in all body parts and all kinds of everything is normal.

I agree, 11plus. My pubic topiary is about my preferences, not even dh's, so there is no way I am going to grow a hairy mary (love that term), just to be a Good Example to my boys.

Though, as I said, I will have the discussion with them about porn, and the unreality of the women it portrays, if the subject arises.

Don't most girls like a trimmed man anyway? I'm not saying a dude's gotta be waxed to the max, but damn, a little tidying goes a long way.

I'm still laughing that you think it's up to mums to teach their boys about pubic hair. I will teach my sons about lots of things but pubic hair isn't my domain, my 11 yo DS would run screaming and never come back if I said pubes to him and we talk about all sorts.

Already had that discussion. Also discussion about golden showers recently Might add we don't sit them down and tell them about things - they ask question a propos things they see on television. I do think we need to be less squeamish as parents - most teenagers are far more open then I was at their age.

I'm absolutely certain that just as boys don't care whether a girl is hairy, I doubt many girls do either.

How many people are, honestly, so promiscuous that this trivial rubbish really plays any part in their choice of sexual partner.

It plays a part in lots of imitate teasing and bullying and peer pressure, as much within the sexes as between, but behind closed doors between couples who care about each other?

Immature

I find the whole things rather bemusing TBH. I think there is a link between porn and hair removal, but it's not that straightforward and owes more to the general 'pornification' of society than it does actual adult movies. Think back to the days of Baywatch, for example, where Pamela Anderson wore a one-piece so ridiculously high-sided that she'd have had to remove pretty much everything to avoid hairs sticking out the side.

We none of us make choices in a vacuum. We are all influenced by society and cultural norms. It's up to us to show some insight into those and then make informed choices, even if those choices are something we can argue against rationally but still prefer to do anyway. That's allowed, surely. For example, I think heels are bad for your posture, ruin your feet and play into the 'women as sex objects' argument, but I still wear them. I just acknowledge that I am influenced by my culture, and to some extent being influenced by culture is what being a member of society is all about. It's the same principle as to why we obey the laws of the land, after all.

Ultimately, each to their own. The complete removal of hair makes me feel a bit odd because it harks back to pre-puberty, which I find a bit disturbing. That said, while there's no way I'd shave or remove mine completely because it's so high-maintenance I don't have the time and it itches like hell growing back, I completely understand why people would want to trim theirs for reasons of personal hygiene and comfort.

Kids we need a serious talk about pubes

if you care so deeply about each other then making small changes to please each other is just nice.

The same argument re porn means that should we teach our sons (only the mums mind, not the dads) that not everyone in real life has 34DDDDDEEEEEFFFFFGGGGGG boobs?

Come on!

I wouldn't dream of discussing this with DS. Anyway it's all a matter of what the individual wants. And personal preferences. No different to any other type of body hair. Whether it's chest, facial underarm or other. Do what you want.

If porn is teaching young men that women should look a certain way, I'm surprised that young men aren't all ashamed of their own average sized winkies, in comparison to porn stars. Thinking of teaching my daughter that the correct response to 'eurgh, you have hair' is 'eurgh, you're not 9 inches!'.

Oh dear - I'd need a breast reduction then - unless a naturally-occuring 44F was deemed acceptable!