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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To think i shouldn't have to pay HALF of the holiday, just because i have a child?

415 replies

WhistlingNun · 26/01/2013 14:45

My two friends suggested we should go on a caravan holiday this summer with my 5yo dd (neither of my two friends have children).

We've decided on a self-catering Haven holiday and the total price is approx £450 for the week, including funworks passes etc. Only additional costs would be for food and transport, which we'd pay our own way on when we get there.

Anyway, my friends are expecting me to pay half - so £225 - rather than a third - £150.

They say it's because dd will count towards the price too.

I've just checked how much it would be for me and dd to go alone - on the exact same holiday - and it's still £450 - the same price.

The price is based on size and type of caravan, not how many people are in the group. And since the smallest caravan is 2 bedrooms, it's the same price.

(Hope this is making sense).

Anyway, i'm a bit peed off they expect me to pay £225 and they can just pay £112 each. They've reluctantly agreed to go thirds instead (£150) each, but have said it's just to shut me up, they're not happy about it.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
WhistlingNun · 26/01/2013 14:53

Yes - it's not based per person. The price is based on the caravan.

Caravan's only start at 2 bedroom. You can't get a one bedroom caravan.

It would be £450 fixed price whether 1, 2, or 3 adults were going.

OP posts:
WannaSplitAPineapple · 26/01/2013 14:53

Why not say £125 for each adult and half for DD (£75)?

StripiestSocks · 26/01/2013 14:53

YANBU, in our family we split it amongst adults. That is very mean of them, it is an adults holiday.

Has it been booked? I would pull out if it were me, as they are saying 'only to shut you up' - not very kind or conducive to a relaxed holiday.

nickelbabe · 26/01/2013 14:53

what about agreeing to pay half for your child?

so you would pay 3 halves, of one person, they would pay 2 halves each.
that's dividing the cost into 7s.

so:
£450/7 = 64.28
you pay 3x (£450/7 =64.28) so £192.85
and they pay
2 x (£450/7 =64.28) each so £128.57

you have to take into account that you have an extra person, but I don't think you should have to pay a full adult share for her.

AnyFucker · 26/01/2013 14:53

The price is for a 2 bed caravan

They have one bedroom

You and dd have the other

Costs are half the price per room, unless you and dd are squeezing into a single bed ?

FatimaLovesBread · 26/01/2013 14:53

You say you shouldn't pay half as it would be the same cost whether or not your dd was coming? Well it would be the same cost whether or not your friends go too, so that logic doesn't work either.

If it sleeps four people and there are four going then it should be split four ways surely?

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 26/01/2013 14:53

I would have expected to have paid twice for me and my DD. I certainly wouldn't have kicked up a stink and pissed them off before we went Hmm

ENormaSnob · 26/01/2013 14:54

We have the same with centre parcs. It's price per lodge not per person.

We are using 2 of the 3 bedrooms and therefore are paying 2/3 of the price. Mil and her partner are using one room so paying 1/3.

I would never expect someone to sub me and my dc.

Mutt · 26/01/2013 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

crashdoll · 26/01/2013 14:55

YANBU because you've have to pay £450 regardless of if your DD was there or not. It's not per person.

Stropzilla · 26/01/2013 14:55

Since its by room not person and you are taking half the rooms you should pay half the cost. YABU. Really you should apologise and pay your fair share or you may find your friends won't ask again.

Original poster
WhistlingNun · 26/01/2013 14:55

I don't understand why i should have to pay half though. If dd wasn't going, it would still be the same price, and we'd only have to pay a third each. But because i'm bringing dd (who adds nothing to the price at all!), i have to pay half?

OP posts:
Shelby2010 · 26/01/2013 14:55

Can argue this one both ways, but on balance YABU. Why don't you offer a compromise that you pay £200 & they pay £125 each?

EmmelineGoulden · 26/01/2013 14:55

By your logic Whistling why don't you pay for it all? It would be the same price whether they come or not so you should pay the £450 and everyone else can tag along for free.

It's sometimes hard when you socialize with childless friends because you often have a lot more expenses than them and no more income. So I see why you are struggling with this. But they arent BU to think two of you, two of them.

Agree with others - if you're arguing and building resentment at this stage don't go on holiday with them.

StripiestSocks · 26/01/2013 14:56

The people saying its four peoplair am soooo glad you are not my 'friend' it would cost the same f the child goes or not. The child has no earnings, so is not very kind to expect the child to pay for themselves.

PickleSarnie · 26/01/2013 14:56

YABU. If one of your friends didn't go then the price would be the same too. Should they use that as justification for not paying as much? If there were agree rooms and you were sharing then you should pay less. But there's not so only fair to pay half.

FreePeaceSweet · 26/01/2013 14:56

This kind of holiday is pretty much based around kids though. Unless its just being used as a base and you won't see much of them then it'll probably be more focused on your child and what they want to do. Kids change the dynamic.

PickleSarnie · 26/01/2013 14:56

Three, not agree. Stoopid phone.

Emilythornesbff · 26/01/2013 14:57

Nickelbabe's suggestion sounds good to me.

StripiestSocks · 26/01/2013 14:57

Well, that was excellent typing, well done me!

EuphemiaLennox · 26/01/2013 14:57

If sharing holiday accommodation you share costs between the number of people going.

If two people were going theyd pay the cost of the caravan between them.

If 3 people were going they split the cost 3 ways.

As 4 people are going you split the cost 4 ways.

As you're responsible for your daughter you pay both your shares.

People book larger accommodation they couldn't afford on thier own and then share it and split the costs to make it affordable. So they fact there aren't any smaller cheaper caravans is irrelevant.

You are basically asking them subsidise your daughter.

Taking kids on Holiday is not usually free.

Ilovesunflowers · 26/01/2013 14:57

You should pay half. You will spoil the holiday if you don't compromise IMO. There will be ill feeling in the group.

Shelby2010 · 26/01/2013 14:58

But you could use your argument to say it would cost the same if you didn't go at all. In which case they should pay £225 each & you go free!

FatimaLovesBread · 26/01/2013 14:58

But crash her dd is going so that point is irrelevant. It would be £450 whether one of her friends went or not so should she not have to pay? Because if she didn't go the total cost would still be the same. That's an illogical way of looking at it.

Agree with anyfucker and others, it should be split by room surely?

angeltulips · 26/01/2013 14:58

I don't really follow your logic - why would you not pay half? Saying "well it'd still be £450 if DD didn't come" is missing the point - it'd also still be £450 if YOU didn't come. Or one of your friends. So what?!

It is a 2 bedroom place, with 2 sleeping berths per room. Your 2 friends are sharing a room. If you didn't come yes it would still be £450 but they'd have a room to themselves each!

If I were you I'd be hideously embarrassed to have pulled that stunt.

YABVVU