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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel so upset regarding contact.

999 replies

MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 26/01/2013 13:50

Some of you may know my backstory from the nature of my post. I namechanged a while ago and have been trying to put the past behind me and move forward with 5mo DD.
Me and my ex have a rather volatile relationship. He didn't want me to keep DD. since she has been born he hasn't provided physically or emotionally. He pays half the maintainence he should.
I tried to keep him seeing DD, him coming here, me there (2.5 hour drive). Supervised by me.
I don't want or agree with any child been taken away from their father but he is so inconsistent and to put it bluntly useless it had crossed my mind that it may be better if he goes away.
He has had a new girlfriend who seems to have taken priority since when I was 5 months pregnant.
It's now 22 days since any contact with him. He's ignored my attempts to send pictures and updates and is like to know if I am BU by thinking this is not acceptable and letting it upset me.
I'm a bit of a wreck today. I know this is AIBU but please try to be gentle.

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 04/03/2013 12:53
Grin
StrugglingBadly · 04/03/2013 14:03

Grin My DD loved my singing voice until she could talk Hmm. She now cuts me off when I start singing in the car, and glares at me if I don't stop. She's actually a great wee singer herself, if a bit warbley. Me & my mum have to stiffle our giggles when she starts as she does that OTT warbley thing and then settles into a decent rendition of whatever song she's singing. Her 1st toon was balamory in the back of my car at about 10 mths old. Even if you are as good tone deaf as me, you might well end up with a lovely wee songstress Make. Keep it up!

GregBishopsBottomBitch · 04/03/2013 14:32

Me and DD engage in some rather obnoxious singing in the car, right now my little singer, is working her way through the 80's ballards.

Never beat the time i heard her singing "Mr Loverman, shabba"

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 04/03/2013 14:40

Surefire way to get DH to switch on radio or CD in car: I start humming or singing .

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 14:41

That is hilarious!!!!
I find myself singing along to this remote control from firsher price I bought DD.
She loves it and we hate it, she worked out how to get it to sing.
It's awful truely awful

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 04/03/2013 14:44

Friend of mine bought our DS a toy trumpet for his 3rd birthday.
We retaliated with a kiddy drum kit for her twins.

GregBishopsBottomBitch · 04/03/2013 14:56

My mum bought my DD a piano with microphone, i think shes getting revenge on me for all the noisy shit i had as a kid, cant wait til DD is older and has babies, oh shes gonna get it good.

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 16:55

How I hoped they loved the drumkit.
Maybe the noisy toy could live at nannys house?
I've been asked on a date Confused he's 18Blush

OP posts:
flow4 · 04/03/2013 17:23

That's a nice confidence boost :) Are you going to go? (And how old are you?!)

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 17:28

Gosh I don't think so I'm nearly 24! It seems slightly wrong Shock

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 04/03/2013 17:31

It's nice to be asked if they're nice. Maybe he's very mature! Does he know how old you are?

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 17:35

Yes and knows about DD. he doesn't drive or anything tho

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 04/03/2013 17:42

22 or 20 I might say what's the harm, have a few laughs, let your hair down, 18 not so sure.

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 17:45

18 is just too young I think

OP posts:
nomoreplease · 04/03/2013 17:48

Can you not see that you are not going to change his attitude to his child? Just get on with your life and let him take responsibility for seeing his daughter.

flow4 · 04/03/2013 17:49

I have a son who's almost 18, so it feels much too young to me! Shock But I dunno... Maybe he is very mature?! You can only go on your gut feeling... And either way, it's nice to be asked :)

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 17:51

I suppose best to be asked than not.

Can't believe it DD is sitting up, all be it a bit wobbly but still.

OP posts:
CruCru · 04/03/2013 17:54

You should go. At worst you have a dull date.

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 17:59

Really?

OP posts:
GregBishopsBottomBitch · 04/03/2013 18:12

Go girl and have fun,it might be shit, but you gotta kiss frogs before you find a prince, i havent been asked out all after my break up and its nearly 4 years now.

CruCru · 04/03/2013 18:23

At least you get to wear a pretty outfit and put make up on.

Skyebluesapphire · 04/03/2013 18:34

I've had a message from a guy wanting to meet me. He looks nice, similar age, sensible, self employed, says size is not important. (thats good if he means my weight, but not good if he means other things Grin Wink

you have nothing to lose by going on a date, as long as he doesn't have a curfew and have to be home by 10pm for school Grin

Original poster
MakeItUpAsYouGoAlong · 04/03/2013 18:40

Very funny Skye Grin

So when are you going? Smile

OP posts:
CremeEggThief · 04/03/2013 18:41

You should both go!

Skyebluesapphire · 04/03/2013 18:46

its a scary thought isnt it?! I went on one date without even thinking about it really , but since then I just cant be bothered, but this guy sounds quite nice. I might chat to him a bit and see if he is normal or just a perv. they soon out themselves Grin

age is but a number. he may be a mature 18 year old, he might have younger brothers and sisters and be used to babies, kids etc. My XH was 8 years older than me and ended up acting like a 12 year old brat, so age doesnt mean a thing.