AIBU to breastfeed in a restaurant?

[lovetomoan]

DH says I am, that people are paying to eat and not to see my breast. AIBU or is he BU?

YANBU, I've never had a boob on show when feeding, even with mammoth 36G boobs, no mean feet. Always use a scarf to cover me and baby up. Have been sat next to people feeding and they haven't realised, even my bils who get very embarrassed if you even mention the word boobs.

Surely restaurants and cafes are the sort of places where bfing is most likely to happen - they're comfortable, food and drink to hand....plus (this may just be my DD) but has anyone else noticed that even tiny babies always want a feed when they smell food?

If I'm out shopping or something and DD wants a feed I always head to the nearest cafe- seems the obvious choice.

YADNBU - he should be more supportive as it can be pretty nerve-wracking feeding in public at the best of times.

YANBU.

You win for the most unanamous AIBU thread ever.

YANBU. My DW BFs quite happily in restaurants, cafés, churches, and anywhere else she's sitting when DS gets hungry. AFAIK nobody's ever noticed, let alone been offended.

YANBU However this reminds me of a suggestion that DH made when DD was newborn that he wouldn't feel comfortable with me BFing around his (male) friends. I wasn't outraged by it at the time as I wasn't hugely confident about it either and neither of us had much experience of other people BFing (he had none).

2.5 years and another BF baby and it seems ludicrous that he would ever have said that. I feed anywhere and everywhere: a family meal with my grandad, a marriage service in a Catholic cathedral, a meeting with our financial adviser - and yes I do feed around his friends.

It was just a case of being uncomfortable with the unfamiliar in my DH's case, and he quickly got his act together. Could this be similar?

The first time we went out as a family after DS was born, DH looked a bit worried when I said DS needed a feed. He actually thought I'd do the top off boobs out approach I did at home. When I just got on with it following the scathing look at "are you really going to feed him HERE" (here being a cafe), he realised you couldn't see a thing. Neither could the bloke at the next table who was so busy cooing over DS he didn't realise he was being fed, until his wife said "leave the poor wee lad alone George, he's trying to have his dinner!"

Oh, and I had to have a word with DMIL about wrecking the whole discreetness of the situation when I was BFing DS in (another) cafe and she attempted to shield me from onlookers with her coat! She then conceded she was being a bit over the top when she realised the whole cafe was looking at her crazy coat lady and nobody realised what i was doing

I used to be nervous about feeding in public but I don't care any more. I'm very discreet anyway. Jumper up, vest down and you can't see anything!
Fed in Cafe Rouge yesterday which left my other hand free to eat :)
Think DH was a bit nervous about it too at first but has realised it easier than expressing and facing with heating up a bottle whilst DS is screaming (which will attract more attention than you feeding).

YANBU OP! He's a muppet and needs a stern word. If people in the restaurant cared about it, it's their problem!

I love those hats, they are highly adorable!

I think the discreetly thing is a bit of a red herring. You hear about some women who make a big show of getting their boob out, leaving it out whilst fussing with baby and then doing the reverse when baby has finished, but realistically, you just don't see them! Most people who BF learn quite quickly the methodthat works for them and their child and can organise themselves and their child quickly when it comes to feeding times from what I have seen in public. The only person who BFs that I've caught a glimpse of anything has been my boss, and that's only because my charge is an absolute fidget and will jump up proclaiming "Other side!" at random intervals. Even then it doesn't happen often!

I've BF everywhere. If your FIL has an issue, the problem is his not yours.

Well DD couldnt feed so I expressed all her feeds and bottle fed. Tell your DH that if I quite happily sat on trains, in cafes and on benches in town with a breastpump (hidden as much as pos under a muslin but still fairly visible) then you can BF in a restaurant!

YANBU.

Although, on our first outing as a family of 4, my ds1, who is 7 got all panicked in the tea room where we were having lunch when the baby starting making 'I want feeding' type noises. Ds1 said to me, 'but what are you going to do? You can get our booby out here the police might take you away. Getting your privates out in public is a crime. We caused more attention from laughing than breastfeeding!

I once fed DD now 7 in a display at Ikea. I asked a shop assistant where I could feed the baby and she said "anywhere you like, please choose an arm chair or sofa". No one batted an eye lid and the only comment was from an elderly couple who came to ask if the arm chair was comfortable for sitting with babies as they were expecting their first grandchild :)

PS If you're having trouble eating one handed try going out for a chinise or japanese. Provided you can use them chopsticks are designed for just that and make life so much easier

I have done, plenty of times. And on a train, while shopping etc. There is nothing for anyone to see! A baby with head tucked in close to you with jumper
over part of the head...

YANBU

The first time we went to a restaurant was when DD was a few weeks old. She starting giving me cues, I was incredibly nervous about doing it in public. DH told me not to be silly, cut my food for me and I got on with it. Only comment was from an old lady asking if DD had fish and chips for her dinner, when we walked past on our way out.
I feed wherever I need to; sat in the middle of Boots, in restaurants, in cafes etc. I don't think that anybody waves their boobs around, the baby's usually got them covered! I don't use a muslin or scarf as DD won't tolerate it. I probably showed more boob when on holiday or clubbing.

When feeding DS out in public for the first time with my mother, she made a huge fuss over it. Draped a muslin over much, which I promptly removed, and told her that just like anyone else she was welcome to sit somewhere else if she didn't like it. Bloody woman.

and WallaceWindsock that is awesome Well done you!!

I think it's inappropriate to breast feed in a restaurant personally, you should go to the toilet to avoid embarrassing other diners, people don't want to see milk squirting out of a breast when they're eating, fiddling with bras etc. Also, babies regurgitate and milk could be expressed onto the floor or other people. Restaurant tables aren't the place for bodily excretion.

0/10 theplodder

'Go to the toilet'?? 'Bodily excretion' indeed, she's feeding a baby, not dropping her trousers and crimping one out. Get a grip.

Nice try plodder.

Next time you're embarrassed by a brand new teeny baby, why don't you simply take YOUR dinner and eat it in a toilet cubicle to avoid the sight.

Seriously plodder is that a genuine post?

Why don't you go eat your dinner in the toilet if you're offended by a baby eating his/hers?

Oh come on, of course it isn't.