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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be a bit miffed that no one has remembered our anniversary?

95 replies

phantomhairpuller · 09/01/2013 17:33

We only got married 3 years ago! Out of 100 odd guests, only 2 have wished us happy anniversary!! None of our parents have mentioned it, nor the best man/bridesmaids.
DH thinks I'm being daft but I can't help but feel a bit miffed Hmm

OP posts:
BellaVita · 09/01/2013 17:35

You are being a bit precious over it!

As long as you and DH remember it that is all that matters.

MrsCampbellBlack · 09/01/2013 17:36

God - I'm lucky to remember my own let alone anyone elses.

Unless its 25 or 50 years then you are being unreasonable.

Lulumama · 09/01/2013 17:36

did you really expect 100 anniversary wishes? i'd expect from DH, my parents, his paretns and siblings. that's it really. as long as you guys remembered then that;s great !

lurkedtoolong · 09/01/2013 17:36

I kind of know how you feel, but at the same time I'm dreadful for remembering other people's anniversaries so am a bit of a hypocrite. Anyway - happy anniversary.

firawla · 09/01/2013 17:36

other people dont normally remember your wedding anniversary, its more for you and your dh
people go to a lot of weddings, cant remember all of them!
if your dh forget then yanbu but as it is - yabu

abbierhodes · 09/01/2013 17:37

YABU. Your anniversary is for you, it doesn't mean anything to anyone else. Do you remember everyone else's? If so I'd find that a bit odd.
I only send my parents a card if it's a 'big one'.

RuleBritannia · 09/01/2013 17:38

I send anniversary cards for the first anniversary and then the big 0s (except for Silver etc).

IDrankAllTheGravy · 09/01/2013 17:39

See I never remember anyone anniversaries, but then I don't expect them to remember ours. I feel that it's a personal thing to celebrate between the couple, no one else.

TheFallenMadonna · 09/01/2013 17:39

Our anniversary is for DH and me. I find it odd when people define their relationships in terms of bridesmaids/best men after the wedding.

YorkshireDeb · 09/01/2013 17:40

I get a card for my parents & it's a struggle to remember that. I have no idea when anyone else's is. If you want people to remember next year try talking about it lots in the week running up to it. X

Nixea · 09/01/2013 17:40

Same as RuleBritannia, I send a card for the first one and then only on the significant ones. I barely remember my own let alone anyone else's!

YABU a teeny bit precious.

EuroShagmore · 09/01/2013 17:40

Really? My parents send us a card on ours. I think a few people marked the first anniversary but that's it. It's really for the couple to celebrate. I wouldn't really expect anything from anyone else.

If you are a bit emotionally needy, my top tip would be to post on Facebook "Happy Anniversary to wonderful hubby. I can't believe it has been three years already!!!!!" and change your profile pic to one from your wedding. That should generate some congratulations.

MrsHoarder · 09/01/2013 17:40

I wouldn't expect anniversary cards off anyone (except DH and possibly DM). Do you send a card to everyone you know on their anniversary?

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 09/01/2013 17:40

YABU, it's your anniversary for you and your DH to celebrate, everyone else has moved on.

I never send cards or even recall other people's anniversary dates. My mum used to end us a card which I thought was slightly odd, even she didn't bother this year.

AngelsWithSilverWings · 09/01/2013 17:41

I remember being quite confused when we received first anniversary cards as I had always thought that anniversaries were for the couple to celebrate alone.

I've never sent an anniversary card to anyone unless it was for silver or ruby one.

jumpingjackhash · 09/01/2013 17:42

Anniversaries are really only special to the couple, perhaps their parents too (depending on the nature of the relationship of course). You can't expect everyone else to remember anniversaries - can you imagine having to remember and send a card for every anniversary of every wedding you went to?!

MonsterBookOfTysons · 09/01/2013 17:44

It's our wedding anniversary today too.
Happy anniversary.
Only the pils remembered today. They are buying us a present and got us a card. Everyone else remembered after seeing my fb status, including my mum.
I wouldn't worry tbh, it is for you and your dh.

BackforGood · 09/01/2013 17:44

Agree with everyone else - anniversaries are only special to the couple and not always then, so I wouldn't expect any cards (although MiL ends cards for everything, she's in the minority)

Hulababy · 09/01/2013 17:45

We don't send cards or recall wedding anniversaries tbh, bar the first for close family/friends. I just about remember my own and wish DH a happy anniversary!
f I know a special one is coming up, generally having heard about it from someone beforehand, then I will try and remember to send a card.

rubberducky24 · 09/01/2013 17:45

sorry but I think YABU - I love sending cards but think it's becoming a thing of the past. I send one to my parents and grandparents, sent one to my best friend on their first anniversary last year (I was chief bridesmaid and DH was best man, otherwise probably wouldn't have bothered.) Probs won't send one to them this year. I think wedding anniversaries are only special for the couple involved, too many other dates to remember so I would never expect anyone to remember mine. I would be touched to get a card but wouldn't expect one off anyone nowadays.

Lambzig · 09/01/2013 17:46

YABU How strange. I would be a bit miffed if DH forgot, but certainly dont expect anyone else to, neither would I remember anyone else's, even if we have been bridesmaids etc.

I have only ever sent anything to anyone for a silver or gold wedding anniversary.

knackeredmother · 09/01/2013 17:47

Not one person has ever remembered ours ,family included. I thought that was pretty standard but was pissed off the first year.

Autumn12 · 09/01/2013 17:47

YABU. Your anniversary is really only important to you and your DH.

diabolo · 09/01/2013 17:47

Totally U sorry.

Only you and your DH should care about it, it's your anniversary. Only really special anniversaries should be celebrated by others.

Fakebook · 09/01/2013 17:49

Yabu. Your anniversary is only special to you and your DH because that's the day you were joined in matrimony. A big majority of your 100 guests that day only came for the free food and booze. Sad but true. Get over it.

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