To not understand why people blame their dc for lack of sex

[BabysPointlessPocket]

Seriously, I can't!
Is it just an easy excuse for women to use when they can't be bothered?
I have young dc, one also that I bf'd. It never affected my sex drive.
Maybe its just me and I shouldn't speak for others.

Yeah......what everyone else said....

Penis

I don't really see why anyone would need an 'excuse' to not have sex. It's something you do for mutual enjoyment, not a moral obligation. No need for 'excuses' if you don't want to do it. Interesting that OP uses words like 'bothered', as if she finds it an effort.

Hi op. are you the woman whose dh earns a shed load of money but you still feel poor?

You sound so similar..

Your all out this week arnt you..

can't we have a decent troll thread debate for a change?

how about 'scones, rhymes with stone or gone?' and 'what goes on 1st, jam or cream and what about the butter?'

YANBU at all. Joined up thinking is really hard for some people. This isn't your fault op and it's unfair that people are criticising your inability to understand that we're not all the same.

Good luck with your article anyway.

I think I liked it better when they just talked about poo.

There was a weird central heating troll type thread today

I have often seen it said on mumsnet that lack of a fair division of labour in the household relates to lack of desire for sex - unfair division of labour is often precipitated by arrival of first child and the woman going on maternity leave. So might be more the partner than the children, in some cases.

We do have a lock on the door.

And one morning a little voice suddenly piped up-"Mummy, why are you breathing so loud?"

Tended to be lack of opportunity for us.

It's not so bad now mine are 5 and 2 but when they were younger I felt "touched out" after I'd been in constant contact with them all day, constantly being pawed at, fiddled with, slobbered on, bounced on, climbed up, etc. The last thing I wanted was to be touched by someone else at the end of the day.

Plus I was in mum mode. I couldn't switch from wiping noses/bums/sick straight to wanting sex, I needed a good couple of hours to relax, feel like a person again, then get in the mood. Which rarely happened because they'd take ages to go to sleep and then I'd be knackered, cleaning and clearing up the wreckage of the day, so I hardly ever felt in the mood.

Honestly kudos to you if your libido never got disrupted but I'd say you were probably just lucky. A few more kids will sort that out for you.

OP - when you and I are in the Old People's Home and in the bedroom next door, could you PLEASE KEEP THE NOISE DOWN because I will be concentrating on the bingo.

Provided Harry Styles will still be doing his charitable visits...

I guess we can't all be as superior as you. What a shame.

I wondered that too tbh, I have 2 kids both partly breastfed, if they wake up they come in with us etc, etc.

But they both largely sleep through so maybe that's why, IME some forms of contraception really lower you sex drive and generally make you feel like shit. On the implant I had no enthusiasm at all.

Dame

Scone rhymes with moan

Cream then jam. No butter.

Children who do not reliably sleep in their own beds. A child with ADHD who can wake at any time in the night and be awake for hours on end.

Don't be so damn smug and start being a bit more understanding.

I dont want anymore children so why bother having sex or do people actually do it for pleasure and pleasure alone??

Like glenthebattleostrich, it's not down to lack of sex drive it's down to lack of sleep!

yy to "touched out"

yy to hormones (bf suppresses normal hormone cycle, and I tend to need an oestrogen surge to get horny)

yy to exhaustion (when you're that tired, you don't waste even three minutes horizontal time shagging when you could be sleeping)

yy to part-time co-sleeping and comically timed interruptions.

Was about to say exactly what Tunip said. Why on earth would you need an 'excuse' not to have sex? If I don't want to I say no, it's sex, not PE! I don't need to provide a note from my mum excusing me. Not sure why you are so annoyed by others' lack of sex life either, does it affect you if I don't have sex very often? Yabu and very, very odd.

You still have the teen years to go op. please do update then

My sex life fizzled out after having our first baby. I haven't had any for 8 months and it's at the point now where I'm too afraid to bring up the subject in case I get an excuse. It used to be down to tiredness and having too much to do, plus my boyfriend works late. Now I don't know what it is but he's not interested. Probably because I'm fat.

Lucky you!

op, you didn't have much sex before conception, i take it.

It can't be that hard to understand why someone's libido might suffer when they have young DC's?

Our sex life has dipped but it is dp who wants less. It's not baby weight either because I weigh less now. (thanks ds for literally sucking me slim!)