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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel mightly annoyed that everyone forgot my DS 1st birthday

97 replies

mandoo · 04/01/2013 18:28

He only got 6 cards. Only one of my friends remembered and even his uncle forgot. I am a stickler for remembering peoples birthdays and sending cards. One of his gifts was wrapped in christmas paper, surely this is just not on? I feel I may now 'forget' everyone else's birthday this year!!

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 04/01/2013 18:31

How many do you think he should have got?

And clearly everyone didn't forget or he wouldn't have any cards would he Hmm

Salmotrutta · 04/01/2013 18:31

Oh, and YABU by the way.

theoriginalandbestrookie · 04/01/2013 18:32

6 cards, thats quite a lot to have arrived unprompted.
Fine forget everyone elses birthday I'm sure they will live

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 04/01/2013 18:32

He is 1, he really won't care.

Even in years to come who cares about christmas paper? It get ripped off and binned anyway.

He got 6 cards so 6 people remembered.

Gumby · 04/01/2013 18:33

Yabu

He won't mind what paper his present is wrapped in

ItsMeYourCathy · 04/01/2013 18:33

Nice reply there.....

YANBU I'd be peeved also. Sometimes, people get caught up in their own lives and forget things. I hope you and DS had a lovely day and that you enjoyed his first birthday

nightowlmostly · 04/01/2013 18:33

I'm not sure if YABU, tbh. I'm crap at dates, and if one of my friends had had a baby a year ago I might well not remember the exact date. Did you talk about it in advance, arrange some kind of party? If you didn't mention it I can understand why people forgot, these things aren't as significant to other people as they are to you. I get why you're a bit upset though, their first feels like a really important milestone.

I'm planning a big family do for my DS's first birthday, I won't give anyone a chance to forget! We didn't have a christening as we're not religious, so this will be our proper party to celebrate his birth.

ujjayi · 04/01/2013 18:33

Erm, he received 6 cards and some gifts. Get a grip. His birthday was not forgotten by all.

YABU, ungrateful and rather precious.

whistlestopcafe · 04/01/2013 18:34

YANBU. First birthdays are particularly special and it's sad that family members have forgotten.

I don't see the big deal about the Christmas paper though. I have been known to wrap presents up in Xmas paper in June!

HecatePropolos · 04/01/2013 18:34

At this age he neither knows nor cares about his birthday and any cards he get will not so much be appreciated as chewed Grin Ditto wrapping paper.

I am sure when he is old enough to actually know it's his birthday, people will get things for him. At one year old, it's really for your benefit rather than his.

And I know how you feel Grin I'd be all grrr, you forgot my BABY YOU EVIL BASTARD!!! Grin

But you have to put on your sensible pants and let it go. See how they are in future years, when he knows anything about it.

Or you could mention it. See what they say.

dequoisagitil · 04/01/2013 18:35

Cards for a one year old (and for small children generally) are pointless and a waste of money.

Close family should give a present, god-parents (if any) as well - apart from that everyone else gets away with doing nothing, imo.

LynetteScavo · 04/01/2013 18:36

Did you have a party for him?

I find that's a good way to remind people of birthdays.

You may be a stickler for remembering peoples birthdays and sending cards, but not everybody is.

carocaro · 04/01/2013 18:38

I'd be peeved too, however tis par for the course, I don't remember friends children's birthdays, there are too many, they don't remember mine and it's fine, sort of an unwritten rule of life as a Mum that no one tells you about! As long as you and Dh and close family it's all that matters. My brother, DS's Uncle is a fab fun uncle but can't remember their birthdays and it does not really matter cos he still loves them.

Kalisi · 04/01/2013 18:41

I would only be annoyed if close family had forgotten my DS's first Birthday. We did get quite a few cards but that's because we threw a party. Otherwise he wouldn't have got many.

Original poster
mandoo · 04/01/2013 18:42

Ok mixed results there. Ranging from full on bitchy to rather sweet. Typical mumsnet stuff. Thanks you all for your opinions, as always enlightening.

OP posts:
DontmindifIdo · 04/01/2013 18:46

Are you holding a party? If so, most will just bring them there.

Honestly, I can't remember my nieces birthday date, it's early July, and I have it written down somewhere, so will work on the principle if they don't hold a party, I'll send something the last week of June to be on the safe side.

LuluMai · 04/01/2013 18:47

What's wrong with Xmas paper? I always wrap DS's in left over Xmas paper (birthday 27th Jan)- kids don't give a shit what paper they're wrapped in (particularly at the age yours is at)- they want what's underneath!

HollyTheHedgehog · 04/01/2013 18:49

My sons birthday is today. Several family members forgot.

Its not their fault, they'd never deliberately forget, its just the time of year. Peoples brains are scrambled from Christmas and new year and getting their heads round going back to work.

Its just the downside to having a birthday this time of year, dont take it to heart. Dont be too hard on them.

DontmindifIdo · 04/01/2013 18:49

BTW - who were the 6 cards from? For a 1st birthday I would expect cards from grandparents, parents, yours and DP's siblings and any godparents, after that, I wouldn't expect anyone else to send one without throwing a party, that would be about 6 for us...

TraineeBabyCatcher · 04/01/2013 18:51

It would depend on who forgot.

I have a big family, so 6 cards would mean half of the family had forgotten, I would be upset at family forgetting.
However friends forgetting is fairly normal I think.

MrsDeVere · 04/01/2013 18:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hugoagogo · 04/01/2013 18:53

YANBU

As someone who has a birthday over the Christmas period, I remember vividly having birthday presents wrapped in Christmas paper and it certainly did bother me.

CloudsAndTrees · 04/01/2013 18:54

Whether YABU or not depends on who 'everyone' is. I'd expect Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles to remember, but not friends, unless you have always given presents to their children, in which case, they are now obliged.

bbface · 04/01/2013 18:56

Relax. He got a few cards and pressies.

Whatever you do, try not to be this uptight around his as he grows older. Teach him not to get worked up and stressed about the little stuff. And to be absolutely clear, this issue most definitely falls under the 'little stuff' banner.

Original poster
mandoo · 04/01/2013 18:57

Thank you. I just knew that birthday gifts wrapped in Christmas paper was not on. I would never do it, thats why they sell birthday wrapping and christmas wrapping.

OP posts:
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