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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that not paying child maintaince should be a criminal offence like tax evasion

275 replies

ReallyTired · 30/12/2012 21:12

One of ds's friends has a father who is extremely well off, but has been terrible about paying maintaince. The man has taken no interest in his child, and the mother has found getting maintaince out of her ex is like getting blood out of a stone. The little girl is living in adject poverty because her father owes thousands. The man is able to afford a whole host of foreign holidays and can easily afford to support his daughter.

I feel that men who hide their income for maintaince purposes should be jailed. Even if they have second families.

OP posts:
MrsTomHardy · 30/12/2012 21:14

YANBU

LaCiccolina · 30/12/2012 21:16

Agreed with u. Start a petition?

Pochemuchka · 30/12/2012 21:16

YANBU

Can't think of anything else where you have to pay money and are expected to do so but there are no real consequences if you don't.

It's disgusting.

SnookieSnickers · 30/12/2012 21:17

YANBU.

MrsMcEnroe · 30/12/2012 21:19

I think this is illegal in the USA (correct me if I'm wrong please somebody?). One of my cousins knew an American, who lived in the UK and couldn't go back to the US because he would be jailed for non-payment of child support ....

Sadly this wasn't a big enough red flag for my cousin, who married the tosser man, when she was 19, and was divorced by the time she was 21.

He did go back to the US, and did go to jail, apparently. His child must be so proud of him.

Pochemuchka · 30/12/2012 21:21

Maybe it should be done like an attachment of earnings for those on PAYE or benefits so they never see the maintenance money in the first place.

And for those who hide their incomes they should have their assets frozen while they are investigated. Might think twice about it then!

Needs to be taken seriously and the consequences need to actually affect the non-payers' lives.

difficultpickle · 30/12/2012 21:22

YANBU. My ex has an lifestyle hugely in excess of his below minimum wage declared earnings but there is nothing I can do about it. I used to catch him out by not claiming anything and then filing a claim with the CSA but all that means is he gets savvy for the following year's tax return. His 'bumper year' translated itself into declared earnings of £140/week which obviously goes a long way to service a mortgage of £300,000 Confused.

WhoWhatWhereWhen · 30/12/2012 21:23

The fault is with the CSA they have many powers they refuse to use

WhoWhatWhereWhen · 30/12/2012 21:23

*Is also with

LemonBreeland · 30/12/2012 21:24

Yes I thought that too MrsMcEnroe. Sadly from watching Teen Mom. I remember something about one of the Dads going to jail if he didn't pay child support, and that included when out of work.

acceptableinthe80s · 30/12/2012 21:25

YANBU. I have being saying this to anyone who'll listen.

Offred · 30/12/2012 21:25

It is an offence I think and they can be jailed. They can also do a deduction of earnings and do if the parent refuses to pay.

LemonBreeland · 30/12/2012 21:27

Totally agree btw. It is so annoying that some Men just run away from resposibilities and get away with it.

TravelinColour · 30/12/2012 21:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Amazoniancracker · 30/12/2012 21:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

5madthings · 30/12/2012 21:29

bisjo i think they can investigate if he obvioysly has a lifestyle that doesnt tally up with 'declared earnings'. I know of someone who did this, it ended up in court eyc and the csa and the judge took a very poor view and awarded substantial backpayments etc.

Yanbu op but i think there are some sanctions that can be placed but they arent given out very often.

Then we also have another thread where a suprising number of mnetters seem to think its ok for a man to 'opt out' of fatherhood and the financial responsibility if he didnt want the baby...

Amazoniancracker · 30/12/2012 21:32

But can I just say as a point aside, what the actual FECK is Ken Dodd doing on Channel 5?

TV executives must be pissing themselves on their fat salaries sitting in restaurants in Soho right now.

middleeasternpromise · 30/12/2012 21:32

I would send you mine but hes moved to the Middle East, also not covered by any arrangements, still its nice to see they can move on isn't it....

Amazoniancracker · 30/12/2012 21:33

which thread is that 5madthings ? [holding harpoon emoticon]

ledkr · 30/12/2012 21:34

Amen to that op. my x has the life of frcking Riley has had two more dc and never pays me a bloody penny

Amazoniancracker · 30/12/2012 21:36

Yes middleeastern it's lovely for them isn't it. Smile

May all their spring joys follow them

and may all their winters be mild,

may all their summers be warm, happy and leisurely

and may they suffer severe constipation.

quite often

5madthings · 30/12/2012 21:39

Its in aibu and is called something like 'to not have sympathy for my friend' the op is a right charmer...

HollyBerryBush · 30/12/2012 21:40

Amazoniancracker without meaning to sound like the board police - I think it is totally inappropriate to have a link to your ExPs facebook account posted here with your version of events.

Booyhoo · 30/12/2012 21:42

Op do you know what abject poverty is? are SS involved with this child?

i do agree that it should be a criminal offence not to pay child support.

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 30/12/2012 21:46

YANBU at all. I agree wholeheartedly.

I am also concerned about "Trial by Facebook", Amazoniancracker.