To think that not paying child maintaince should be a criminal offence like tax evasion

[ReallyTired]

One of ds's friends has a father who is extremely well off, but has been terrible about paying maintaince. The man has taken no interest in his child, and the mother has found getting maintaince out of her ex is like getting blood out of a stone. The little girl is living in adject poverty because her father owes thousands. The man is able to afford a whole host of foreign holidays and can easily afford to support his daughter.

I feel that men who hide their income for maintaince purposes should be jailed. Even if they have second families.

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

And yes I am well pissed of with she, as we are in debt up to our eyeballs from raising (willingly) the SCs with no contribution from her, only to be hit with a "new" claim - for the youngest - who by the way we always supported and had 40% residency of, while she is thousands of pounds in arrears for the "old" claim.

[Amazoniancracker]

splash those poor fathers who have lost their kids eh?

They're all weeping and wailing around our local streets and pushing their babies/walking their toddlers/taking their young teenagers to pizzahut everywhere I go.

Not.

If so many fathers want their children after a split, why aren't they in Morrisons?

Why has my friend's husband just been astounded by the amount of romantic interest he had from women when he pushed my son around for an hour a week ago?



Fathers for Justice? Pah.


Fathers for Justice should first of all turn their sights to fellow 'fathers' like my ds's dad in Thailand. They do not have a leg to stand on while they continue to ignore their fellow 'fathers' (the majority) who do not give a fuck. They do not have a united front. They need to get their own house in order.

But they never will.

Boys just whine and whine. On and On. Whether it's socks, bins, roast dinners or their lost kids.

FFJ is a wonderful neon sign - they're entitled and they think they deserve what they want.

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

What are you on about - the SCs lived here, with us?

[Amazoniancracker]

she her we all these terms are alarming Izzy as you post a lot in relationships and your loathing of your step children's mother is worrying.

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

I think you may have me well confused with someone else - I dont post in relationships

[Booyhoo]

how are those alarming terms? very

[Booyhoo]

i post alot about my EXp. what does that mean? can i not post on a thread about CSA payments? still very

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

Perhaps the thousands of pounds of CSA arrears she has built up over the years are a figment of my imagination?

Maybe really, she paid and DH and I just never knew about it and the CSA have stolen our money - I mean they do have a bad reputation and all that.

No I think it is far more likley she simply never paid.

[sashh]

I heard (a long time ago so I can't remeber if it was ever implemented or where) a proposed scheme where a parent not paying had their licences revoked.

So no driving licence, no fishing licence, no licence to practise medicine etc etc

It seemed like a good idea because it has an immediate impact.

Or maybe there should be a child tax. You get taxed for every child you have, but at a rate of 0% if the child lives with you.

[blondietinsellyminx]

YANBU & I agree with niceguy

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Amazon,

Your misreading posts and mixing up posters. You've just ranted at one poster who agreed with you and then another one who you've mixed up with a compleatly different poster.

It's a making you sound like your either drunk or a bit of a twat, I'm sure your not but you are sounding like one.

[flow4]

I'll vote for you OP.

It it scandalous and hugely frustrating that so many absent parents simply decide they're not going to pay anything, and there is fuck all the resident parent can do about it.

The CSA has powers they do not use... or are so slow to even to begin to think of using that circumstances change before anything is actually done. My X owes assessed arrears of around £25,000. The CSA took over a decade to enforce an attachment of earnings. He quit his job and wrote to me to tell me I had 'forced' him to leave the country... The CSA told me they had the power to remove his passport, but somehow they didn't manage to do that before he left.

Festive, you ask why they are so useless. I think it is because they only act efficiently to recover money when the resident parent is in receipt of state benefits - so maintenance saves the state money. If the resident parent is earning, like me, they just don't bother.

[Amazoniancracker]

Yes, sorry. Will re-read in morning.

Just finished a load of shitty chemo with ds. basic point is that Op is NBU.

Gaah. Sorry again.

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

Dont worry about it Amazon, we all have crap nights - yours has probably been worse than most - hope you and DS get some sleep x

[Amazoniancracker]

Thankyou

ds has bad pains. vincristine. effing vincristine

[izzyhasanewchangeling]

I am so sorry - is he still in hospital or are you home??

[Amazoniancracker]

We're at home. He had IV Vincristine on Thursday and is on tabs at home. He's not had a good day Today. Mouth and knee pain. hot, grumpy, miserable and he's also on dexamethasone so hungry all the time. have made countless pancakes and burgers today. It's fine. It does make me angry with the CSA in some random way though.

I also don't understand why every father who doesn't want to pay anything, or indeed be chased for bills or debts etc, doesn't go to Thailand?

It's so damned easy. Lovely warm country, cheap to live, beaches, great food, cheap work..(have never been there myself but this is obviously the case)

Of course there are a lot of father-escapees over there, but the child support people will never sort it out/seek them out. Why should they bother?

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Amazon, I really hope he's able to get a decent nights kip,and is enjoying the pancakes. Have you been able to eat anything?

I'm totally with you on the Thailand thing my ex ran off there as well apparently he was so emotionally damaged by being cought shagging my now ex best friend he had to spend about 2 years over there diving and contributing towards the abuse of vulnerable women on film, just to recover. He's back now and given my old company to his current gf and claims she employs him at less than nmw ( the jobs exempt from nmw) the csa have taken 5 years just to sort out a diversion and lifestyle inconstancy variation but have openly admitted to me that they just can't find where he hides funds even if they know he does and have him on tape boasting about his income.


flow4 maintainance no longer has an impact on state benefits so now the csa don't give a shit about any of the pwc's its not just the employed ones they can't be arsed with these days. Half my clients are even struggling to get the £5 a week actually paid to them or with lost paperwork or just incompetence.

[Damash12]

Agree totally - what an arse he sounds.

[Iactuallydothinkso]

The CSA is the biggest toothless tiger ever.

My kids are 14 and 12 and I split with their dad when the youngest was still a baby. To this day I am yet to receive a single payment. The CSA went so far as putting a charge on both of the properties (yes! 2 houses!) owned by my ex but are unable to secure any regular payments.

He is down as not claiming benefits and not paying tax so is therefore untouchable. He sees his kids every other weekend and has them half the holidays. He lives in a 5 bedroom barn conversion, drives a very flash car, the bailiffs have been round on numerous occasions but "everything is owned by his wife or his mother". He remarried and has 2 more kids that go to private school, they have amazing holidays and he just laughs in the face of the CSA who have the power to do precisely nothing.

I don't chase the CSA anymore. It is too disheartening and stressful. I gave up. I can't secure payments and they're not interested in doing the investigative work.

I'd sign up for something where there are major consequences for someone who doesn't pay what they should.

It's a pile of crap. It really is.

[Collaborate]

The system jails as many non-payers of maintenance as it does parents who disobey contact orders. Not sure how you could justify jailing more of one lot but not the other. Non-payers can be jailed for wilful refusal to pay. Jailing either parent is not generally considered in the best interest of the child, which is why it's used as a last resort and in extreme cases.

[creamteas]

No. it should not be a crime, and I really, really don't want to pay more taxes to pay for the prosecution and imprisonment of people who don't pay. It would costs a lot more than supporting the parent with care through the benefits system.

I have never wanted, expected nor received any maintenance for my four DC. I worked bloody hard to get to a point where I am financially secure (had to claim benefits when he left, house was repossessed) and I don't work my twat of an Ex having any power over our lives.

[Mayisout]

Why do so many women choose partners who are arseholes who do not give a fuck?

[creamteas]

Possibly because people are not always born arseholes, but can turn at any stage!