in asking just what time the world will end tomorrow?

[SirCliffRichardSucksEggsInHell]

I've got plans you see and wanted to schedule them around the apocalypse. You'd think the Mayans would have narrowed it down to a time slot wouldn't you? Like delivery drivers?

11.11 you say i,m off tomorrow with the boys but hubby will be at work at that time i did hope we could all be together

The apocalypse came round but you were unwilling to let it shit in your toilet so it has gone elsewhere.

I told my teenagers they weren't allowed to go out tomorrow night (last day of school because I want us all together at 21.12 when the world ends.

Unfortunately ds has decided that it is actually 12.12, so he offered to stay at home from school, and then if we don't all die he can go out tomorrow night.

Though at least if I'm dead I won't have to collect him from wherever he is going.

I liked your joke, andimac.

I am sure Simon Cowell will be involved somehow SirCliff!

Surely that should be 21.02 21.12 2012 if we're being truly mystic. And That's in South American, so those of us in Europe get a few hours more.

if it makes anyone feel better all the other 183 predictions of the end of the world since roman times havent come true

This explains why my window fitters haven't bothered turning up . They must have thought it pointless to start a two day job in the circumstances .

Should I go for a wee first?

Nah there will be lots of reglazing after the fire and brimstones. No point getting it done now.

I don't want to have a Jurassic Park moment, being caught on the casi as all hell breaks loose around me. I mean, that's not very Kate Winslet, is it?

Everlong - my DH has to go to the GPs - imagine spending your last moment surrounded by coughing crinklies getting their piles checked.

I'm just gutted I've spent a fortune on Christmas presents no one will get. I might phone round tonight and tell my family that I got them all ipads. I haven't, but they will never know.

These things always happen at the most inconvenient moments don't they? Like when the postie knocks for something I need to sign for, I'm in the bath and the kids answer the door and shout up "Muuuuuuuum, the Grim Reaper's here and you need for sign for it! Are you having a POO?"

Honestly, the amount of times I've jumped out of the bath knowing that the kids have opened the door to a strange man.

BoffinMum, go for a pee love. It ain't happening till 5pm someone said. Cause that would be 11am Mayan time or summat?

I am rather chilly actually, I hope the end of the world is a bit warmer.

Ooh ooh, it's started, look someone started trying to create zombies

I'll be at a wedding. I suspect the apocalypse may take the form of a bored, hungry toddler tbh.

Arse, 11 really? I wont have had a proper chance to start my Yule celebrations with MrsBeep, looks like we'll need to start food cooking much earlier.

They are all a bit loopy over there aren't they?

Oh no, the kids will still be at school, I hoped we would all be together at the end of the world. If I keep them off, and the world does not end, do you think it would be marked as 'unauthorised absence'. Obv. if it does end then no one will be around to give a shit. It is just so tricky, this apocolypse malarky!!!

Message deleted by four horsemen

Erm, I think it's started with me...

After Jeremy Kyle, the t.v went off
My christmas lights went off
My broadband light went out

The dustbin men have just left, they are 3 hours early