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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To feel sorry for the Australian DJs?

921 replies

andapartridgeinaRowantree · 08/12/2012 00:38

Obviously more sorry for the nurse's family. I wonder how long she was having suicidal thoughts for? I can't think this could have been the only cause,

But these pranks have been going on for such a long time and those DJs could not have predicted such a result and are going to have to live with it for the rest of their lives.

It's such a tragedy and I feel very sad for all concerned.

OP posts:
QuickLookBusy · 10/12/2012 11:44

Just seen the deletions.

It's very telling that some of Everlong's posts have also been deleted, whilst the person saying unpleasant things about a dead woman have all been allowed to stand.Angry

TantrumRun, have you just joined MN or have you name changed?

farandawaysheran · 10/12/2012 11:46

Actually I think you're lying about having depression and making a suicide attempt to try and justify your vile posts. Nobody who had ever been in that horrific pit of despair would ever judge another so harshly.

Speechless and leaving this thread.

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 10/12/2012 11:51

mnhq can you please email my deleted threads.

natation · 10/12/2012 11:54

Why are the offensive posts about a dead person still there?

RedToothbrush · 10/12/2012 11:57

MNHQ generally only delete posts that have been reported and often leave ones that are as bad, but haven't been reported.

So if you see something that you think breaks the rules report it yourself and don't assume someone else has or that MNHQ will look at the thread as a whole; they tend to just look at reported posts in isolation.

mollysfolly · 10/12/2012 11:58

Thank God I don't live in Australia if this is what passes for entertainment

womblingalong · 10/12/2012 11:58

I agree with farandawaysheran's last couple of posts.

I am shocked by the comment that Templerun is lying.

I think there is a valid point in what Templerun is saying (that a feature of suicidal and depressive behaviour, is that it can be seen as focused on themselves, and therefore perceived as selfish), but only when seen in the context of that these people are ill, and deserve compassion and help, not blaming them.

SantaFrontPaws · 10/12/2012 11:58

They were awfully quick on the button today though.

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 10/12/2012 12:00

You get that quite often on a thread.
Some fuckwit poster will upset many people with very vile and hurtful comments, people respond and they are deleted but the person who has caused it has their posts intact.

Very unfair.

MNHQ
LittleTownofBethleHelenMumsnet · 10/12/2012 12:01

@QuickLookBusy

Just seen the deletions.

It's very telling that some of Everlong's posts have also been deleted, whilst the person saying unpleasant things about a dead woman have all been allowed to stand.Angry

TantrumRun, have you just joined MN or have you name changed?

QuickLookBusy: everlong's posts were deleted because they contained a personal attack.

As NewKateMumsnet has already posted, we do realise this is a highly emotive thread but we do ask everyone to stick to our Talk Guidelines.

If there are any other posts that you think break our Guidelines, do please report them to us. We're always happy to take a look - and if we've missed any, we will do our best to rectify that ASAP.

womblingalong · 10/12/2012 12:01

I also think that templemum's posts have not been well thought through in terms of their impact on others on this thread who have had the horrific experience of suicide or depression.

wannaBe · 10/12/2012 12:04

"Some people don't need external reinforcement to feel remorse. They have a conscience and they feel what they feel because it's the way they are made." and you think that two people who pulled off a stupid prank don't have a conscience? So nothing but the baying mob will suffice?

You know what, there's been an awful lot of assumption on this and other threads, that this nurse committed suicide because of this prank. There has even been suggestion that it could take something like this to drive a previously mentallly stable woman to suicide, just like that. And anyone who has dared to suggest that there must have been previous mental health issues has been shot down, the implication being that none of us can possibly know that we wouldn't react in the same way were we in the same situation.

Well, how many of us have been in a situation where something stupid resulted in someone killing themselves? No-one? no? Well in that case, how can anyone possibly know how anyone would or should react in a similar situation? Fact is we don't.

Death doesn't trump everything you know. No-one has said it isn't tragic that someone killed herself after this hoax took place. But that doesn't mean that because one person died, all others are not deserving of sympathy. Or will only death do that?

natation · 10/12/2012 12:05

I would interpret some posts which are still standing as a personal attack on a dead person and her family. They could also be construed as highly offensive for those bereaved as a result of suicide. Can you really not see that too moderators? Or is it ok to attack a dead person?

Yorkpud · 10/12/2012 12:06

YABU - there are more worthy people to feel sorry for here.

If you go around doing stupid pranks to humiliate people you need to be prepared for things to backfire. However, I think the radio station boss is more guilty by letting it get aired in the first place.

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 10/12/2012 12:06

A personal attack on all my deleted posts! Hmm I'd like to see them.

Helen does it not matter that people are being provoked on here?

SantaFrontPaws · 10/12/2012 12:09

Everlong - I have never known you to make personal attacks, even when people are being ignorant, provocative or just plain pld twats.

DreamsTurnToGoldDust · 10/12/2012 12:14

I reported templeruns posts as I thought they were highly offensive to people on this thread who have had friends or family lose their life through suicide, and to be honest MNHQ I can see and empathise totally as to why Everlong responded as she did.

Sometimes its not just the personal attacks that need to be deleted, but posts that appear to provoke or inflame as well.

MNHQ
LittleTownofBethleHelenMumsnet · 10/12/2012 12:14

@natation

I would interpret some posts which are still standing as a personal attack on a dead person and her family. They could also be construed as highly offensive for those bereaved as a result of suicide. Can you really not see that too moderators? Or is it ok to attack a dead person?

We're happy to look at any of those posts, natation - do report them to us (and we'll look through the thread again now)

But, just so everyone is clear what our guidelines are about...

  • The rule about no personal attacks primarily applies to Mumsnetters on this thread (or a clearly identifiable MNer or group of MNers).

  • We completely understand that there are posts on this thread that could be highly offensive for those bereaved as a result of suicide (as, indeed, at least one of us at MNHQ has been) but it has never been our policy to delete offensive posts (unless they're truly beyond the pale).

The truth is, as we always say to those who are offended by posts on MN, we don't think we should be the arbiters of what people should find offensive and what they shouldn't. More to the point, it's very rare that a tasteless comment is left unchallenged: as this thread amply demonstrates.

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 10/12/2012 12:15

Santa rarely I've called someone something knowing it would be deleted but not caring because I was so mad.

But in this case I was mindful of not purposely called a certain someone anything. But obviously the powers that be think otherwise.

SantaFrontPaws · 10/12/2012 12:18

But the are some people (not saying anyone here was doing this mind) who's trot up, add some provocative posts with the intention to get a rise and bleat to mumsnet to get them deleted. It may be a power kick. Even I've been deleted on such a thread and it was getting to the point where it was just the Trolls posts that were left. Just saying...

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 10/12/2012 12:18

So we can't call someone a fucking cowbag for posting something extremely vile? But their posts are left to stand?

How is this fair mnhq?

MsNobodyAgain · 10/12/2012 12:19

I read it all before it was deleted. I don't believe Everlong should have had her posts deleted.

How long until this thread goes 'poof'?

HeftyHeifer · 10/12/2012 12:19

I came back hoping to see the thread back to a sensible place of discussion of what's a very sensitive topic. Sadly mistaken.
It seems that posters are allowed to come onto a thread with offensive AND provocative statements in their posts which are clearly intended to wreak havoc and cause a lot of upset, then disappear after a feeble attempt at trying to explain some of their heinous comments and 'get away with it'.

natation · 10/12/2012 12:19

aha so the dead woman is not on mumsnet so it's ok to attack what she did, ok I understand now.

noddyholder · 10/12/2012 12:20

MN at its worst

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