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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be angry at this mother.

165 replies

Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 10:25

Right. I know I'm going to be flamed for this as it's been discussed before but I'll ask anyway.
On the tv last night there was a young mother who was complaining that the council had kept her in b&b because they had no suitable flats. You could see that she was also pregnant. There was no mention of a father for either child.
The last time I checked, pregnancy was optional. It seems totally irresponsible to have another baby when you do not have adequate accommodation for the first.
Councils have a responsibility to house homeless people, and that is quite right. But they cannot keep building infinite numbers of flats just to keep up with people who expect free accommodation for life. The rest of us have to pay for it!

OP posts:
Original poster
Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 12:57

Well LRD it seems quite clear to me what happens if you move employment out of a district.
Look what happened in the north-east when mines and steelworks closed down. Those who were able to moved away to find jobs. The others were left to fend for themselves or rely on impoverished councils

OP posts:
LRDtheFeministDude · 07/12/2012 12:58

That's not really relevant, though, sallying.

London is not about to become a wasteland if some employment is moved around the country, is it?

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 07/12/2012 13:00

I'm not talking about this girl vinegar
I'm on about the thousands of young out of work teenage girls that get pregnant each year.

But if this girl had a job presumably she could afford to get out of b and b?

WileywithSageStuffing · 07/12/2012 13:00

are you one the fuckwits many who think that those living in council accomodation must be claiming benefits?

Is council housing not heavily subsidised anymore?

I get that they may not be claiming traditional benefits but always thought council housing was subsidised (as it was).

For instance here, you can get a 3 bed council house at a rent of £95 per week (not claiming benefits) whereas the same house 2 doors down privately rented is £750 pm.

tethersjinglebellend · 07/12/2012 13:03

It was not said that this woman was living in council accommodation.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 07/12/2012 13:06

Anyone who allows themselves to conceive when they don't have a home or a job or a means of supporting themselves is irresponsible and a drain on society. It's that simple. I don't see why someone who has got themselves into situation should be supported by the rest of us when we have enough struggle to provide for our own children.

If this girl has an income that is not paid for by the state, then she can do what she wants and that's fine. I'd still say it was bad parenting to bring a child into the world when you are living in a B&B, but if she's paying for it herself, then that's up to her. If the rest of us are paying then it's not up to her, and we have every right to judge.

TeamBacon · 07/12/2012 13:07

OP - you sound like my Mother.

Pinkforever · 07/12/2012 13:08

Well said freddo but you will get a flaming for saying that so duck for coverGrin

WileywithSageStuffing · 07/12/2012 13:09

I was just asking an off topic question in response to VinegarTits ....

I doubt a B&B is council owned accommodation.

I also do not agree that a B&B is suitable for mother and child. They should be in flat/house.

However, if someone is going to have a second child i do not agree that they should immediately get any extra benefits/larger accommodation. The decision to have another child should be the same as for those who do not receive help. If you want to have another one fine, but you have to adjust your household budget/spending to accommodate that.

TwinklingWonderland · 07/12/2012 13:10

Agreed, well said freddo.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 07/12/2012 13:10

That's ok Pink, I've been flamed for saying similar before! Xmas Grin

I'm not going to change my opinion though, I'm only stating common sense.

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey · 07/12/2012 13:10

Argeed Wiley if someone is going to have a second child i do not agree that they should immediately get any extra benefits/larger accommodation. The decision to have another child should be the same as for those who do not receive help. If you want to have another one fine, but you have to adjust your household budget/spending to accommodate that

alemci · 07/12/2012 13:11

exactly freddo.

also is the cycle broken by giving mums housing. this has been happening for while now and you find there are 3 generations who have all had teenage pregnancies and it becomes the norm.

tethersjinglebellend · 07/12/2012 13:17

The woman in the report the OP is talking about:

-Was not pregnant
-Was no longer living in a B&B
-Did not say whether she was working or not
-Did not say whether she was in private or council accommodation
-Made no mention of her education

EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 07/12/2012 13:33

Good post freddo

Original poster
Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 13:36

tethers. That doesn't sound like the report I saw.

The reporter interviewed her specifically BECAUSE she was in b&b.

OP posts:
EverlongLovesHerChristmasRobin · 07/12/2012 13:38

tethers are you on the right thread love!
OP said she was in a b and b and she was pregnant again

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey · 07/12/2012 13:39

It is the one i saw on the London News.

She had left the B&B as she had been there too long i think.

She was staying in a one bedroom flat with a friend and her dc.

EldritchCleavage · 07/12/2012 13:39

She had left the B&B after 9 weeks because it was so awful and went to sleep on a friend's floor instead. She also didn't sound grabby or unreasonable, just worn down.

And of course, we don't know when or why she ended up in the B&B-before or after she got pregnant, because she is feckless, maybe the father chucked her out when she got pregnant, who knows.

Original poster
Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 13:40

LRD if enough employment is moved out of an area to rehouse everyone who wants housing, of course that will significantly affect the unemployment ratio.
You can't have one without the other.

OP posts:
HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey · 07/12/2012 13:41

Sallying was it on London News or did you see a different one to the rest of us?

LRDtheFeministDude · 07/12/2012 13:43

No, not necessarily.

This isn't a new and radical idea, it's what's been being done quietly for quite a while - trying to drum up employment in areas other than London, getting businesses to considering moving all or part of their work out.

You've got to remember that you're looking at a whole structure, businesses and housing and all the support systems in between them, and having them all concentrated in one city is quite odd - London is immensely densed populated and the UK unusual for having one city in which so much employment is concentrated.

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey · 07/12/2012 13:43

This is the one from BBC London news

Original poster
Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 13:44

The report was specifically about people who had been in b&b for longer than the prescribed period because housing was not available. The woman interviewed was one of those people.
And there was no mention of where the father was or why he wasn't helping to house the child.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sallyingforth · 07/12/2012 13:45

Thanks for posting the link. Yes she had moved out of the b&b.

OP posts: