OP, can you please explain why, when men and women all over the world manage to work, maintain their homes and not neglect their children, you feel that you would not be able to manage it, and that working would mean that your child would be neglected?
Do you feel that you are less capable than all those working mothers with happy, well cared-for children? Is this a confidence thing?
It seems to me that you could well feel inadequate if you have been raised in a wealthy household where nothing you did was ever good enough, and where you remain dependant on your father for your income after already being indebted to him for an expensive education, and where you then transfer your dependance to a husband who doesn't want you to work and has strong views about a woman's place being in the home.
Everyone has moments of questioning whether they are doing the best job they could do in relation to their children. But the difference is that most people can work this out in their own minds and reach a place of confidence in their own choices.
If you lack that confidence, or feel that your choices are more imited than you would like, then it is probably easier to lash out at others and criticise their choices than admit that you don't feel entirely positive about your own situation.
If you feel that you are doing your best for your daughter, then that is the most important thing. You don't need the permission or approval of others whose situations are very different to yours.