to think the new ASDA advert is the biggest pile of sexist crap in a long time

[MaureenLove]

to think its trying to APPEAL to women? dur!

YANBU!!!!
STAB! STAB! STAB!
Even in the 80's my step dad did Xmas. He got up at 6 am to get the turkey ready, and slaved in the kitchen all day. Kids did the tree. Mum drank sherry.
As it should be

How many kids does the mother have? Is it 2 older boys and a baby boy? Or is one of the older boys not hers? (I clearly need to get a life for even wondering this, but so do the people who have complained to the ASA)

peppermint yes there are more offensive things - but it's normalising the myth that men can't peel sprouts or organise!!

I hated Christmas growing up DM piled such huge expectation upon herself to deliver a perfect day that more often than not she ended up a drunken sobbing mess by 3 o'clock.

And I do shop at Asda. I am totally it's demographic e.g Northern and Poor.
So fuck off Asda-you have just alienated one of your customers!

isabelle - dont be PLEASED when your h does something like clean his own fucking house

DEMAND it

and bet your h is LAUGHING at you sending cards to his relatives!!

sucker!

maureen i would hate to be your dh,

try asking not demanding, and you might have an easier life.

aw thats sweet!

i have sons who one day might marry your daughters. I dont want them to think that by virtue of a vagina your daughter is his drudge

being pro woman doesnt have to be anti man.

no but it would demand a modicum of respect

like pouffe girl hasnt

they wouldnt be, if they didnt want too that is, its about choice.

Isabelle, my husband wouldn't buy his MIL a present, neither do I buy mine one. We both buy presents for our respective families (I never buy for his, he never buys for mine) and so far, everyone has gone something most years!

i choose to be at home and to be a homemaker.

i enjoy looking after my dh and my children, does that make me a drudge?

of course being at home doesnt make you a drudge.
But when one event cannot be shared either because you are a control freak or you cant trust your H to have a brain, OR you think its womens work thats pathetic.

its HIS House HIS holiday HIS parents etc hIS meals too.

dont infantlise your men

Have you heard the Halfords one on the radio recently?

And, out of your examples, my husband has organized a birthday party without me even being in the country (!), bought trainers on his own initiative for September, organized the children to start ballet when they were toddlers didn't even ask me.

I don't agree that you have to do wife work and nothing can change if you don't want to. However, this does lead to ceding a lot of control, and this means your children have clothes you wouldn't have bought and do activities you are not that fussed about that. Many women prefer to organize Christmas so they can have it their own way. I don't, and don't have the time/inclination, I don't think I'm lucky, I think my husband is normal (and when we had Christmas in his home country, he organized the entire thing).

1. Paid dinner money
2. Organised ballet/dance/swimming/tennis etc lessons for dd/ds
3. Bought an outfit for child for a special occasion
4. Checked child's shoes to make sure they fit
5. Cleaned out a kitchen cupboard
6. Bought a birthday card for a school friends party
7. Arranged a sleepover for your dds birthday
8. Bought a lovely present for his Mother-in-law for Christmas
9. Sewn a button on your childs school cardigan

10. Baked fairy cakes for the school fayre 11. Got the Dc's to write thank you letters and addressed and posted them to realatives

My dad did 1-5, 8, 10 (well, made food for special occasions at school, not necessarily fairy cakes!), 11, organised and took part in my parties, polished my shoes and took care of things like bike helmets, went clothes shopping with me, helped me pick out presents for friends' birthdays.......he also has a full time job and would shudder if anyone called him effeminate or anything like that. It's a question of mindset ffs.

It's not about choosing to be a housewife or not, it's about the fact that the Asda mum does every single thing in the ad and still gets the bloody pouffe and patronizing 'what's for tea' comment.

It is a depressing portrayal of a doormat.

And regarding Asda snobbery and their fresh produce, although I may have used a touch of hyperbole , all I can say is I was once unlucky enough to go to Old Kent Road Asda and believe me, it was not pretty. The food was poor quality and it seemed to be overwhelmingly made up of aisles of processed junk. And of course it promotes itself as being cheap, that is Asda's thing, isn't it?

• and btw I don't like the bit about shuddering, but I'm just saying, it's possibly to see these things as entirely "androgynous" if they have to be seen in terms of gender at all

Except the sleepover, because the Dcs are too young, my husband has done all of those things, in fact he organised my mothers 60th birthday party and chose and shopped for her present because I was too busy. And he iced her birthday cake.

He always does the Dcs clothes and shoe shopping and does the food shopping every week, with them in toe so I can relax for an hour with a coffee and a magazine.

2, 5, 6, 9, 11. My dh has done all of those without prompting. Plus loads of other things you haven't even mentioned, like regularly doing a shop on the way home from work to stock up. (and yes, he manages to buy the things we need without me holding his poor wikkle handy)

I don't understand 8? I don't buy my mil or fil presents, dh does and without being "told" (Ffs he's not a manchild) . They're his parents. My mum's not around, but I get my dad's presents.

I'm the stay at home parent, dh is more qualified than me and is by far the higher earner so it makes sense. So because I'm around at school times of course I'm the one that sorts out sleepovers/school fair shop bought cakes.

Just one more point, sending cards to DH's relatives? Hahahahaha!

Sorry, and 4 . He is the one that checks the dcs shoes and polishes them weekly. Without being "told".

The idea that a man is incapable of doing these thing without instruction from wifey has made me quite cross!

Have not seen the Asda ad but can imagine. The P&G "proud sponsor of mums" had me spitting blood. Heard the Halford's one. Only the presence of kids in the car prevented blasphemy. It is all very depressing.

How odd that when writing your Christmas cards you would send one to your brothers family but not your brother in laws family - don't you send cards from your family to other families?