to think the new ASDA advert is the biggest pile of sexist crap in a long time

[MaureenLove]

to think its trying to APPEAL to women? dur!

This reminds me of when I was in hospital with dc1. I was in for 4 weeks before and 2 weeks after. DH was sick to the back teeth of the female neighbour (who at the time had a pathetic manchild for a husband) constantly coming around and "trying" to look after him. Especially as her "help" usually coincided with the little time he had between finishing work and visiting me, or after visiting when he wanted to rest.

He snapped in the end and told her to lay off and that he'd lived alone for bloody years before I moved in with him and that he did half of the cooking and cleaning anyway! She honestly thought he was living on dry crackers and cold beans, because, in her words, "thats' what my dh would do".

This sort of attitude doesn't need normalising by shit adverts.

My dh writes his families cards because they are primarily his family and it's more personal if they are from him.

Doing the Christmas cards is not meant to be a chore to tick off the list.

Why does poor Asda Mum have to sit on the poufee - dont' Asda at least sell garden chairs for a fiver......

My DH probably never did any of the things on the list because he was at work and I was fortunate enought to be able to chose not to. However he has always regarded the running of the house etc as equal to the work he did. He does all the cooking, but will be divorced if he ever buys anything for us to eat in Asda.

The advert is trying (and failing) to be John Lewis.

Put it this way, who would you rather have written your card from your sister's family. Your actual sister, or her husband?

Has no one spotted that Asda Mum is BOTTLE FEEDING.

I don't actually have a sister, but my brother's partner always writes the cards from the two of them, as they have been together a long time and he is part of the family it seems perfectly acceptable to me. DH writes cards to people he knows well and I don't, but surely aunties, uncles, brothers and sisters are part of your family too. FGS, my sister in law is dds auntie, it would seem ridiculous that I wouldn't send her a Christmas card from us but send one to my own brother.

Well my mil wouldn't be overjoyed at her Mum card being written by me, or the Nana card off her grandchildren being written by me either! Birthdays or Christmas.

I write my cards, dh writes his, the dc write theirs. It far more personal to do that, not ridiculous.

If dh didn't have any hands and I didn't write his cards, that would be ridiculous, But thankfully he does, and also, thankfully, he is a mature capable adult who is happy to write cards to his family himself.

Even without being told to

That's fine headless if your DH is the sort that wants to and will buy cards and send them himself, I didn't say that was wrong, it's very nice. But you are suggesting that because my DH doesn't really bother with them, then I should just send them to my own family (although i do consider Dhs family mine too), and I am stupid to send cards to his family too.
I don't write cards from dd, but i do write them from us as a family, eg. to Auntie Ethel lots of love from Isabelle, DH and dd. Most people do.

"What's for tea, love?" A kick in the nuts.

Some men are functionally thoughtless and do nowt. I wouldn't marry one though.
I had a bf for a while who was a single dad, and he was fab in that way. He did all the stuff on that list and more, because he didn't have a wife doing it for him.
Don't enable men to act like children. Its like that 1950s idea that a woman is really in charge, since she has control if the house. Like fuck.

Have you seen the asda facebook page? Full of simpering huns declaring it's so like their house!

Ifnot.

Speak for yourself, I'm in charge of my home and what goes on .
My dh isn't the thoughtless type but doesn't see any point in all the planning for xmas. I do most of it because I'm at home, enjoy doing xmas and think I do it best. I do expect dh, older dcs, and youngest to all do their bit though. There is no big deal about who does what afaic, we just all muck in. Isn't that what families do?

I think the what's for tea comment has been edited to cut away before we see her foot in his face. And therefore quite like it.

Headless - when ds1 was small (about 2yo) I had a friend round for coffee, at about 6pm. Dh walked in,and I gave him ds1. who needed a nappy change (done that minute, before I get clawed to death). Friend, open-mouthed, said 'Is he really going to change ds?' Cos her husband 'would gag, litterally gag.'

Tough, i'd say, gag if you will, but get on with it. I worked all day (with the dc) and dh did too, so home-time chores were shared.

Reminds me of some male friends at college, who were talking about washing up (can't remember why) and I mentioned that my now-DH did it most of the time at home, they laughed scornfully and said he must be "whipped" (and then clarified the phrase, apparently the full version is "pussy-whipped" )

Have to say my opinion of them plummeted at that point - turns out their views on washing up transferred to many other parts of life. Shame, they were nice guys in other ways.

I dare say if they saw a more balanced version of the ad, with the dad doing some of the tasks, they'd laugh at that too.

Similar happened when some new friends came to see our newborn - DH suddenly realised DS needed a change and got straight on with it. Friend turned to her DH and said "you SEE that Richard? He changes nappies!"

I had a male housemate that wouldnt wash up - just put the dishes in the sink thereby blocking it the message being YOU wash it up. Sadly for him one of the other girls was a fiery redhead and put all his washing up in his bed. He sorted himself out then.

Haha! Same neighbour couldn't believe it when she discovered dh changed nappies too

I've just read that F4J are going to protest about this Ad.

F4J and MN united.

I think I'll find something else to get annoyed about.

Watch it Balderdash - I got deleted the other day for just mentioning F4J !

morethan

You misunderstand. I am sure you are in charge of your house. But I want more out of life than just being in charge of a house.
Come to think of it I don't do most of the things on that list!

I hope f4J do protest about it. I am sick of women being cast as servants and men as earners. Even over 20 years ago when I had my first children many many of us avoided sexist marriages, both worked full time and both did as much as the other in the home.

Sadly I suspect if F4J (ie men) protest about it they are likely to be taken more seriously than feminists which is a pity but let us use F4J for our own ends as I am with their cause - want men to be forced to have chidlren 50% of teht ime after divorce whether they like it or not and do half their washing etc etc too.